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Calling All Female NOOLers

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Chilled cucumber :deal:

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NObabe wrote: Chilled cucumber :deal:

eeep

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toys are for amatuers...

anything you can't do with your fingers and a well oiled fist isn't worth it..

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ChrissMari wrote: a well oiled fist

great zeus's beard...

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AgentWood wrote:

ChrissMari wrote: a well oiled fist

great zeus's beard...

i guess.. if it tickles ;)

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anything you can't do with your fingers and a well oiled fist isn't worth it..

:confused3:

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ChrissMari wrote: a well oiled fist

This is the best thread I've read in ages!!!!

:clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap:

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This is the best thread I've read in ages!!!!

Another Quality thread from Digital Threads :D

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A well oiled FISH? good GOD:evil4:

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Flying Teapot wrote:

This is the best thread I've read in ages!!!!

Another Quality thread from Digital Threads :D

Congrats!! This almost make me feel like posting in this forum again! Hey, I'm posting! Again!

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Speaking of toys...

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Flying Teapot wrote: Good COD

Holy MACKEREL...

Snorri xxx

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Rampant Rabbit :uhoh:

Can't believe what ChrissMari wrote - Go to your room young lady! (On second thoughts don't - it won't be punishment)

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[pink]Missy Jem[/pink] wrote: Rampant Rabbit :uhoh:

Can't believe what ChrissMari wrote - Go to your room young lady! (On second thoughts don't - it won't be punishment)

:nonono: And i thought you were an animal lover!:evil4: :lol: :thumb:

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Shhhh, don't tell everybody. I'm a passionate woman, i have needs!

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Comrade Shampanyov, Last Gentleman of the Mohicans wrote: Speaking of toys...

did you read the first one? :barf:

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AgentWood wrote:

Comrade Shampanyov, Last Gentleman of the Mohicans wrote: Speaking of toys...

did you read the first one? :barf:

It is HIM that is the SELLER!:nono: :lol:

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AgentWood wrote:

Comrade Shampanyov, Last Gentleman of the Mohicans wrote: Speaking of toys...

did you read the first one? :barf:

:rofl:

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who needs a toy if you've got a tongue nearby? :D

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who needs a toy if you've got a tongue nearby?

Who's that flexible? :skeptic:

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I dunno, I know at least one woman who's considering writing a book on replacing boyfriends with toys, weed and the occassional meet up with a (platonic) male friend when you just need to feel superior for a while.

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AgentWood wrote: who needs a toy if you've got a tongue nearby? :D

What's your dog's name?

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LE Roberts wrote:

who needs a toy if you've got a tongue nearby?

Who's that flexible? :skeptic:

Liam, apparently.

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LE Roberts wrote:

who needs a toy if you've got a tongue nearby?

Who's that flexible? :skeptic:

:abovelol:

Our first contender for post of the year surely.

Nobody who has time for this place certainly.

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Comrade Shampanyov, Last Gentleman of the Mohicans wrote:

AgentWood wrote: who needs a toy if you've got a tongue nearby? :D

What's your dog's name?

ROVER and out:lol:

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ROVER and out

Roll her ROVER and out.

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Comrade Shampanyov, Last Gentleman of the Mohicans wrote:

AgentWood wrote: who needs a toy if you've got a tongue nearby? :D

What's your dog's name?

i have two cats.

and as cats have barbed tongues i wouldn't try it. well, i wouldn't try it anyway.

100% prime choice human male for me. :thumb:

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AgentWood wrote:

Comrade Shampanyov, Last Gentleman of the Mohicans wrote:

AgentWood wrote: who needs a toy if you've got a tongue nearby? :D

What's your dog's name?

i have two cats.

and as cats have barbed tongues i wouldn't try it. well, i wouldn't try it anyway.

100% prime choice human male for me. :thumb:

Just check his I.D., then, to make sure he's older than he looks. :D

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Comrade Shampanyov, Last Gentleman of the Mohicans wrote:

AgentWood wrote:

Comrade Shampanyov, Last Gentleman of the Mohicans wrote:

AgentWood wrote: who needs a toy if you've got a tongue nearby? :D

What's your dog's name?

i have two cats.

and as cats have barbed tongues i wouldn't try it. well, i wouldn't try it anyway.

100% prime choice human male for me. :thumb:

Just check his I.D., then, to make sure he's older than he looks. :D

but there are fake I.D.s! :p

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Comrade Shampanyov, Last Gentleman of the Mohicans wrote: Speaking of toys...

holy crap! i'm not sure whether to laugh or, well, be sick.

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ChrissMari wrote: toys are for amatuers...

anything you can't do with your fingers and a well oiled fist isn't worth it..

Oh err:whip:

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Emma Peel wrote:

Comrade Shampanyov, Last Gentleman of the Mohicans wrote:

AgentWood wrote:

Comrade Shampanyov, Last Gentleman of the Mohicans wrote:

AgentWood wrote: who needs a toy if you've got a tongue nearby? :D

What's your dog's name?

i have two cats.

and as cats have barbed tongues i wouldn't try it. well, i wouldn't try it anyway.

100% prime choice human male for me. :thumb:

Just check his I.D., then, to make sure he's older than he looks. :D

but there are fake I.D.s! :p

For which Woodsy is eternally grateful. :D

Good afternoon, Emma!

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Yes, I'm sure Woodsy would be happy.

You're still it, Comrade! :)

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Yes, I am.

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Apparently, some people have gone to some lengths for stuff like this. A fried of mine told me they were using this on Howard Stern a couple of weeks ago (NSFW: adults only!!!)

A tongue.....or two??

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Flying Teapot wrote: What is your favourite toy :wink:

Men!

Unlike some, I am a meat eater and proud of it! :thumb:

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Emma Peel wrote:

Flying Teapot wrote: What is your favourite toy :wink:

Men!

Unlike some, I am a meat eater and proud of it! :thumb:

Do you enjoy lion-tamer?

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How RUDE Comrade:eek: :laugh: batteries ARE included:thumb:

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Flying Teapot wrote: I will POST some batteries to America

bettter include some unused vibrators.

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Never considered those types of toys - not yet anyway.

I know someone who accidently submitted the receipt to work to claim back for a very large female toy and got away with it!

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Ness Order wrote: Never considered those types of toys - not yet anyway.

I know someone who accidently submitted the receipt to work to claim back for a very large female toy and got away with it!

Don't talk about JOHNNY GILES behind his bacK!:hat:

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I know someone who accidently submitted the receipt to work to claim back for a very large female toy and got away with it!

What would happen if it's faulty and they need to take it back?

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Flying Teapot wrote:

I know someone who accidently submitted the receipt to work to claim back for a very large female toy and got away with it!

What would happen if it's faulty and they need to take it back?

I'm sure the shop assistants love to handle used faulty ones - eerwwwuuuh!

Seen as they hadn't paid for it, they may as well just buy another.

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Seen as they hadn't paid for it, they may as well just buy another.

Good point well made !

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Ness Order wrote: Never considered those types of toys - not yet anyway.

I know someone who accidently submitted the receipt to work to claim back for a very large female toy and got away with it!

:clap: officer thinking on that deal anyway. I wonder what they filed it under "work related stress relief" "internal massge equipment", the mind boggles.

Still, you know, if your mind DOES wander to such a purchase, how to get it for nowt :D

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Disgraceful!!

There are young adults on the forums you know!

:shades: :evil4:

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State of Love and Trust wrote: Disgraceful!!

There are young adults on the forums you know!

:shades: :evil4:

Nah, it's sound mate, I aint offended

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Me neither. I was talking about Twatto, he's scared of girls you see. :evil4: :laugh:

Lol I can take the mick while he's at work. :nod:

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State of Love and Trust wrote: Me neither. I was talking about Twatto, he's scared of girls you see. :evil4: :laugh:

Lol I can take the mick while he's at work. :nod:

Not worth it...I've tried the same technique......it leads to emails!!!!!!!

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Flying Teapot sure does come up with some pretty interesting threads.

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State of Love and Trust wrote: Me neither. I was talking about Twatto, he's scared of girls you see. :evil4: :laugh:

Lol I can take the mick while he's at work. :nod:

well it did say feemale nooler. i'm sure twatto wouldn't look in her would he.

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State of Love and Trust wrote: Flying Teapot sure does come up with some pretty interesting threads.

That's why I generally defend most any crap anyone wishes to SPOUT round here, bollox often creates the best threads....or at least somewhere safe to play :D

I also always hold the gent in question up any time time there is question over $POSTING_STYLE being the work of satan......why? because he truly is a bastion, a veritable pillar of NOOL, and yet apprx 98.3756 of everything he posts is fermented,undiluted yak's urine. And we loves him for it.

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Comrade Shampanyov, Last Gentleman of the Mohicans wrote: Speaking of toys...

I have the following pre-owned adult toys for immediate sale: Three-speed Vibrator with adjustable head, works great but rotator is slightly jammed with hair. $25 4 size small and extra small butt-plugs. I moved up the size rather quick so they are barely used and in perfect shape. $4 each

:abovelol: I like that

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[darkgreen]Green[/darkgreen] wrote: Apparently, some people have gone to some lengths for stuff like this. A fried of mine told me they were using this on Howard Stern a couple of weeks ago (NSFW: adults only!!!)

A tongue.....or two??

WOW.

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AgentWood wrote:

[darkgreen]Green[/darkgreen] wrote: Apparently, some people have gone to some lengths for stuff like this. A fried of mine told me they were using this on Howard Stern a couple of weeks ago (NSFW: adults only!!!)

A tongue.....or two??

WOW.

I believe this machine is working with its tongues moving on the opposite direction... at least I'm used to lick girls using the top of my tongue, not the bottom...

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AgentWood wrote:

[darkgreen]Green[/darkgreen] wrote: Apparently, some people have gone to some lengths for stuff like this. A fried of mine told me they were using this on Howard Stern a couple of weeks ago (NSFW: adults only!!!)

A tongue.....or two??

WOW.

after seeing a few of those machine-who needs men?

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Maybe these threads should be marked AO for adults only - to protect young innocents like myslef stumbing in her thinking some young gentlemen needs a womans contribution or opinion - perhaps need help choosing a gift for his beloved girlfriend or wife. And instead I find this! :uhoh:

AO in the thread title in guture people - lest I be scarred for life!

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Ed Dalder wrote:

AgentWood wrote:

[darkgreen]Green[/darkgreen] wrote: Apparently, some people have gone to some lengths for stuff like this. A fried of mine told me they were using this on Howard Stern a couple of weeks ago (NSFW: adults only!!!)

A tongue.....or two??

WOW.

after seeing a few of those machine-who needs men?

hey, men have some use... don't knock your gender! :wink:

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I'm willing to be any girl's toy...I come with my own set of batteries! :evil4:

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mil wrote: Maybe these threads should be marked AO for adults only - to protect young innocents like myslef stumbing in her thinking some young gentlemen needs a womans contribution or opinion - perhaps need help choosing a gift for his beloved girlfriend or wife. And instead I find this! :uhoh:

AO in the thread title in guture people - lest I be scarred for life!

And stumbled quite a ways beyond the first post, and then some, didn't we young innocent Mil? :laugh:

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I didnt actually, as soon as I realised what it was about I stopped reading quick smart!

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Emma Peel wrote:

hey, men have some use... don't knock your gender! :wink:

Trust me I know, I am kind sensitive charming and well no luck....

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Ed Dalder wrote:

Emma Peel wrote:

hey, men have some use... don't knock your gender! :wink:

Trust me I know, I am kind sensitive charming and well no luck....

Perhaps you should read the other thread Nice guys vs jerks. You might find it enlightening...!

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Steve Campbell wrote:

State of Love and Trust wrote: Me neither. I was talking about Twatto, he's scared of girls you see. :evil4: :laugh:

Lol I can take the mick while he's at work. :nod:

Not worth it...I've tried the same technique......it leads to emails!!!!!!!

was that the lllooovvvee technique?

I couldn't resist the pun! :p

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Emma Peel wrote:

Ed Dalder wrote:

Emma Peel wrote:

hey, men have some use... don't knock your gender! :wink:

Trust me I know, I am kind sensitive charming and well no luck....

Perhaps you should read the other thread Nice guys vs jerks. You might find it enlightening...!

I have been quite good......

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Ed Dalder wrote:

Emma Peel wrote:

Ed Dalder wrote:

Emma Peel wrote:

hey, men have some use... don't knock your gender! :wink:

Trust me I know, I am kind sensitive charming and well no luck....

Perhaps you should read the other thread Nice guys vs jerks. You might find it enlightening...!

I have been quite good......

....at what? :laugh:

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