Coldplay album review :lol:

Chicken's come home to roost eh Chris? Time for Doves to take up the mantle of biggest British band.Erm, if they can get round to finishing the album.

Coldplay album review from The Daily Mirror

**"**You do have to wonder how the hell we got here. Chris Martin and his well-bred boys are modest operators – charisma-light rockers – but there’s an even more advanced state of hype around their fourth album than its underwhelming predecessor, X & Y.

We’ve had free shows and free downloads to announce the greatest thing since the last time Brian Eno trousered a big cheque for giving an average band credibility.

To mark the occasion, Coldplay pose enigmatically in war paint and military dress – a little Adam Ant, a bit of Sgt Pepper.

Martin looks at the camera lens with a magnifying glass. I have little doubt he sees people rushing to acclaim this album’s greatness the way one magazine did with X & Y. Advertisement Click Here

“Don’t worry its a classic,” ran the headline. Yes, and I’m the Queen of Sheba.

From the spiralling U2-redolent, organ-washed, guitar-reverberating Life In Technicolor, Coldplay affect to make all the right moves, right down to American-friendly spelling.

But, devoid of urgency and the dizzy madness that comprise great rock ’n’ roll, Viva La Vida is not what it’s cracked up to be. It may, with all the hype, help their record company’s share price, but it will have little effect on the many employees at EMI who have lost – and will lose – their jobs. Chris Martin a major poet of the age? Hardly. Despite Coldplay’s money and power, they refuse to write songs that take a stand. “I’ve become so tired of this loneliness”, Martin sings on Violet Hill. Well I’ve become so tired of average talents clogging up the channels of communication rather than REAL warriors of truth and justice."

Coldplay go cultural shopping on the track Viva La Vida. The Eastern affectation re-emphasises the Pepper link, the rave-style freakout ending provides instant nostalgia for thirtysomethings who had it large, but now take it cold.

Martin is as brazen as the prattish rock star he played in Extras when he says Eno “taught us there was a whole lot of other stuff out there to steal”.

Stealing’s fine, so long as you say something with the liberated pop loot and don’t just create nice, comfortable but ultimately empty Coldplay music.

Thats the spirit. The media getting the boot in early, for a change. Although I did read a Sun semi-review, and they were masturbating over it somewhat.

Well "Violet Hill" doesn't throw me off the stool (like we say over here). Boring thing with a "We-try-to-be-Pink-Floyd"- Intro. I heard it several times now, but I can't tell you any single note of it. One ear in, the other ear out. I didn't hear the album yet. But if it's as exciting as 'Violet Hill' then...

Coldplay sucks. Chris Martin's lyrics are crap. U2 should sue for copyright infringement. It is nice to see someone just destroy Coldplay in the press.

Reminds of a line from "Knocked up". Two of the main characters are playing video games and playing a game of "I know you're gay because..."

the best one was "I know you're gay because you like Coldplay" OUCH!!!!

musically they've had a few good moments. it's hard not to like a song like 'clocks,' for example, but goddamn they all have terrible lyrics. haven't heard anything from the new album, but i imagine it'll be pretty mediocre like the others.

I've liked a few Coldplay tunes but from what i've heard of this new album they sound really really desperate for ideas.Chris Martin's had his day in the sun and people have moved on. I saw an advert on telly for the album and i actually thought the track they used was some jokey little ditty they'd knocked up for the ad and not actually a track from the album.But then watching a bit of some MTV Movie awards show the other night Coldplay performed the track in it's entirety and it is indeed a track off the album.It was utter Coldplay- by-numbers bilge.

Thier first album was great, their second ok, and the third blew donkey balls... don't expect much outta the fourth... it seems once they go down the road of 'adult contemporary' the bands never come back... its like selling yer soul to the devil....

The one thing that does bug me on media critics is they always want some sort of lyrics that "take a stand"... why? Imagine NO lyrics that took "a stand"... sometimes the trivialness of the lyrics is what is nice about a certian band (not all bands mind, only certian ones).... but not all music has to be over-cerebralized...

From the spiralling U2-redolent, organ-washed, guitar-reverberating Life In Technicolor, Coldplay affect to make all the right moves, right down to American-friendly spelling.

Technicolor is a trademark; it isn't written with a u. :dead:

i liked too much parachutes...and a few songs from the other albums, maybe 3. But i'm not interested about the new one...less with that name: "Viva la Vida Loca" By Ricky Chris Martin

The only things I like about Coldplay:

The album "Parachutes" and a few tracks from "A Rush of Blood to the Head."

Everything else -

People can be so stupid can't they?

Coldplay were cack the moment they first burst onto the scene.

The best signifier of just how cack they are is proved by the fact that "Yellow" is actually their finest moment. And what an utter pile of tritely-written slapdash toss on toast that song was.

Did that song get an Ivor The Engine award as well?

By 'Eck! My Neck! wrote:

The best signifier of just how cack they are is proved by the fact that "Yellow" is actually their finest moment. And what an utter pile of tritely-written slapdash toss on toast that song was.

I disagree with that though. I love Parachutes, but I can't stand that song... its utter wank

^^ Check the double-sided irony of my previous comment, dude! ;)

they should be happy they had a good album and fuck off then.movng on....

By 'Eck! My Neck! wrote: ^^ Check the double-sided irony of my previous comment, dude! ;)

I'm American, ironing isn't usually done on a Sunday

Andrès wrote: i liked too much parachutes...and a few songs from the other albums, maybe 3. But i'm not interested about the new one...less with that name: "Viva la Vida Loca" By Ricky Chris Martin

it's taken from a painting, rather that a song. still pants though, natch.

I don't like them.

(Although I do rather like Trouble and Violet Hill. Does that make me a bad person?)

They're not for music fans; in the same box as most over-hyped pop as far as I'm concerned. I simply can't think of them on a deeper level than, say, Steps or Brotherhood of Man. The fact that they're successful makes no difference to me in the same way that I don't care that someone's out there selling rather a lot of paperclips. Coldplay are just a commodity to be consumed, rather than art to be enjoyed.

I was quiet surprised to find that, as a live band, Editors are in the same category. My initial excitement at seeing them yesterday quickly decayed to disappointment then utter apathy. It would have happened a lot sooner if it hadn’t have been for the utter beauty of the dark green Rickenbacker that the guitarist was using to play the same few notes over and over again.

They were utter crap, to be honest. Perhaps they were having an off day, but I would say that anyone who enjoyed that live act wasn't much of a music fan or had an even more unhealthy obsession with high notes being played on a Rickenbacker than I do.

His Holiness, The Pope wrote: ...it's hard not to like a song like 'clocks,' for example...

I have managed it. Effortlessly, as it happened.

i'm sure everybody is looking forward to that guy from bush's solo album also.

It must really piss good bands off to see useless groups like Coldplay get treated like serious musicians.

I saw a band called Rochelle yesterday. They were great. Really interesting music played with loads of enthusiasm and a cracking singer. I bumped into the singer and the guitarist later on. That was great, I said. Thanks, they both said.

No full-page spread in the Sun required. They did a great gig, packed up their stuff and then got on with their day.

They were the anti-Bongo

good, bad and indifferent. i will be buying the d@mn cd.

Biginoil wrote:

They were the anti-Bongo

Why is it at my work, I keep serving Brits that dress up and act like Bongo? I've had at least 3 in the last week Is there persecution of bongites in the UK? Are they seeking asylm here? If so, I'm sending them back :mad4:

Biginoil wrote: They were utter crap, to be honest. Perhaps they were having an off day, but I would say that anyone who enjoyed that live act wasn't much of a music fan or had an even more unhealthy obsession with high notes being played on a Rickenbacker than I do.

must have been an off day, i've always rather enjoyed them live. we'll have to agree to differ on that one.

agree with coldplay appealing to five cd a year man

Good point, I'd not thought of that Shug. Fair play indeed.

Come on Coldplay, I say

I think they are good for Britain actually. They have quite a broad spread of appeal and have achieved quite a good deal of international success. Chris always comes across as quite pleasant and polite aswell.

Oh you have grey eyes, blue ey.....um..er hang on? wrote: I think they are good for Britain actually. They have quite a broad spread of appeal and have achieved quite a good deal of international success. Chris always comes across as quite pleasant and polite aswell.

JUDAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Polite?

If I want polite I'll go and see the bank manager.

Rock stars aren't supposed to be polite. They're supposed to ride up in a mucky bus, feel up your bird then puke in your shoes.

Any respect I had for Coldplay has just gone right there when you said that.

Biginoil wrote: Polite?

If I want polite I'll go and see the bank manager.

Rock stars aren't supposed to be polite. They're supposed to ride up in a mucky bus, feel up your bird then puke in your shoes.

Any respect I had for Coldplay has just gone right there when you said that.

I just dont understand the vitriol over them when all they do is write some fairly harmless rock and pop.

Oh you have grey eyes, blue ey.....um..er hang on? wrote:

I just dont understand the vitriol over them when all they do is write some fairly gormless rock and pop.

I've corrected your spelling mistake.

Vitriol is just what we do, mate.

It makes us feel clever and superior.

Oh you have grey eyes, blue ey.....um..er hang on? wrote:

I just dont understand the vitriol over them when all they do is write some fairly harmless rock and pop.

If it was harmless it wouldnt be on the bloody radio all the time, or on this forum. For some this causes pain, for other 'lovers of music', it is when a band's popularity changes from being ok, to morphing into 'up their arse' pretentiousness, powerful enough to affect politics, in some cases. Once a band regularly makes Heart FM, they fall into this category, and their CD graces many a coffee table across the nation, being more regularly dusted and only played, when friends are around, just to be faux 'hip', and 'in with the kids'.

I am certainly not a 'fan' of them really, but I think its worse when you see those bands on Jools Holland or the NME - pretending that they are turning water in to wine when all they are is shouting and whacking out a few chords

I do think it is funny that people take so much stock in Coldplay's widespread popularity... granted they are promoted better than what they really are, but its just business and most people are sheep... I don't see CP as a direct threat to society as a whole

Oh you have grey eyes, blue ey.....um..er hang on? wrote: I am certainly not a 'fan' of them really, but I think its worse when you see those bands on Jools Holland or the NME - pretending that they are turning water in to wine when all they are is shouting and whacking out a few chords

It's all such a racket these days, isn't it? Sounds like people bashing dustbin lids together.

Wasn't like that in my day

didn't they insist on an extra long gap between New Order finishing their set and them starting theirs at glasto 2005 because they were scared of being upstaged or summat? or were they just waiting for the pantomime horse to be put down?

my brother was chatting to a BBC tech in a pub in Glastonbury town the day after who said this actually