State Of The Nation - Worst NO Lyrics ever?

This - whisper it - was the last New Order single I ever bought (okay, please don't all stage a mass revolt in shocked outrage...) before the LP Brotherhood came out - which was also the last New Order LP I ever purchased, before sort of not really bothering with them since (I blame that on discovering the wonderful world of Sonic Youth then, my life ain't been the same since...!). With good reason too, since Bernard's lyrics are absolutely appalling on this track... so that didn't bode very well for the prospect of further NO singles - though a few I've liked since: Touched By The Hand Of God, Run, Regret.....but not too much to get excited about if I have to be really honest.....

Mr Sumner is just excelling at his lazy rhyming couplets on this one - and even then the words just sound like so much random gibberish , e.g: "You can walk/and you can run/you don't have to be someone" (???!!) Elsewhere we get this pearl of wisdom: "...I drove in my stolen car/ when it broke down/i kissed the ground/cos i don't kiss when you're around...." (eh?? someone explain to me this awful drivel?!?!). Truly a prime example of Barney's lyrical prowess then....as if we needed reminding. Forget World In Motion for crap lyrics - this one has to be the ultimate dud from start to finish! Who agrees?

Nah mate. "Behind Closed Doors" really takes the cake.

I check up on the scores I listen to The Corrs Behind closed doors

Complete and unmitigated arse.

There's quite a few embarrassing rhyming couplets out there in Barney's big book of bollocks ! Sooner Than You Think is just one that springs to mind ! You could probably stick all his decent lyrics onto one record.....in fact that gives me an idea for a new thread ! As soon as he stopped trying to copy Curtis he got embarrassing lyrics-wise.

Slow Jam has shite lyrics.

Originally posted by Sébastien Boisvert I'm happy to see that people have finally let go of Slow Jam.

The afternoon was very clear The sun was beating down on me I got thirsty for a beer That I had to go to sea The sea was very rough It made me feel sick But I like that kind of stuff It beats arithmetic

thanks for reminding me seb. Slow Jam is horrible. Get Ready is a great record (best of 01) but why did they leave Slow Jam? worst new order song hands down. Barney's lyrics hurt a lot of songs. He is the weakest link in neworder (what does gillian do again?). they need to do more instrumentals and barney can save his rhymes for childrens books.

why can't neworder choose from their whole cataloge when playing live. it should be down to a few rehearsals but they make it sound like its a major chore. i don't understand why someone couldn't simply play the keyboard parts live? does new order need 2 guitars? it's sinful that they just trigger samples and sequences without any live synth support. lazy bastards.

Originally posted by Geaux Hagen thanks for reminding me seb. Slow Jam is horrible. Get Ready is a great record (best of 01) but why did they leave Slow Jam? worst new order song hands down. Barney's lyrics hurt a lot of songs. He is the weakest link in neworder (what does gillian do again?). they need to do more instrumentals and barney can save his rhymes for childrens books.why can't neworder choose from their whole cataloge when playing live. it should be down to a few rehearsals but they make it sound like its a major chore. i don't understand why someone couldn't simply play the keyboard parts live? does new order need 2 guitars? it's sinful that they just trigger samples and sequences without any live synth support. lazy bastards.

You've only got to listen to some of the keyboard fuck-ups to know that Gillian did play live keyboards on many songs. It would be interesting to hear from the band themselves why they insist on playing the same set every night now, having been so proud of not doing so for so many years.

Sorry, my oversight - as I said at the top , I don't possess any other New Order records since Brotherhood so I've obviously been (thankfully?) oblivious to the further examples of heinous lyrical crimes some of you have kindly quoted here . Judging by the toe-curling triteness of some of them, maybe I'm fucking glad I never bothered investigating their later catalogue if only just to avoid further embarrassment.

As for Slow Jam - the quoted lyrics are utterly wretched, what the fuck possesses Sumner to write such inane crap? Has that bastard never left Kindergarten or something? For frigs' sake!!!! (My kid can probably write better words than that - and he's only three!)

bbt, i`ll tell u what possesses bernard to write such crap...pernod and dramamine.

I did earlier apologize for the comparing some bits of New Order to T. Rex, but if you look at the lyrics there are obviously some Bolan there and pure pop-escapism in here: - words put to together to make a fine pop tune. The lyric may seem meaningless, but it rhymes. The refrain makes some sense though, speaking of inflation, at the time of its release the inflation was on its way up.

WIM - still think it was a bit of a travesty. fancy getting keith allen in to write the lyrics..desperate times eh?

spleener, the "sooner than u think" reasonable/seasonal couplet is an absolute classic; a bad lyric that still does the trick.

"state of the nation"...total bollocks! i think shellshock was also a bit of a stinker lyric wise, though ive not listened to it in yonks so cant recall the dodgy bits.

barneys a middle aged codger with an easy, comfortable life. i reckon he needs a bit of upheaval, to give him something to write about....one of us should track him down, embark on a torrid affair (it wont be me) and treat him like crap; that might shake him up a bit...

why not me? well cos that would be taking devoted fandom to new heights id rather not scale...god ive got the hysterics just thinking about it. put it like this; barney sans kit.... need i say more?

oh he`s just too short for me.

I'll do it...

i said it first..... sorry April, beat you too it! lolol

Liv

Originally posted by velocity girl oh he`s just too short for me.

Do you know i'm 6'4" VG?? And I love intelligent women!

muffy, do i look like a Dateline form.. :p :)

Hi, I'm Trevor, I like long walks on the beach, short naps in the nude. getting out once every year, shaving my shoulders and relaxing in the warm Siberian sun :D

Republic should be called the Barney album. When I listen to Republic these days i imagine a band who don't want to be together and the music/lyrics reflect that image. The lyrics seem to be more personal and real than those on Get Ready. I think his lyrics are better than usual on what most believe is the worst NO record. With his business/personal relationships slipping away, Barns summoned up the muse to help him deal with the shit hitting the fan. "Were you abandoned in your youth/because if not you will be soon" is a great couplet and Republic is full of other quality rhymes. The last 3 tracks on Republic are as good as any closing trifecta. With the exception of Ceremony, EGG and Temptation from Substance, Times Change, Special and Avalanche may be the best 3 in a row on any neworder album. Get Ready may be the weakest lyrical effort by Barney but perhaps the greatest achievement as a band. To make such a compelling album after 8years and a lot of harsh words is a miracle. Maybe they will have enough confidence to stretch-out their musical legs and create another masterpiece ala Perfect Kiss. If Stephen Hague had been replace by Karl Hyde, Rick Smith and Darren Emerson, Republic would be the best NewOrder album in the world Ever Vol. 1.

Well said, I've always been a supporter of that little gem known as Republic. Some of the greatest albums were born from heartache and difficulty.

Originally posted by velocity girl muffy, do i look like a Dateline form.. :p :)

Not at all!! You look like a beautiful, intelligent, articulate, fun loving, female New Order fan to me. All that and a lovely smile too! Am I right?? ;)

I'll second that....

[quote"You can walk/and you can run/you don't have to be someone"

It may sound stupid, but, To me it works perfectly: You don't have to take everything so seriously all the time. You are allowed to be yourself. You don't have to think so competitive all the time. You don't have to be perfect to dance to it.

I'll suppose you can dance to more intellectual stuff as well, but are dance tracks meant to be all that intellectual?

It just amazes me that New Order "fans" still bitch about Barney's lyricism this late in the day. What exactly did you fall in love with the band for??!!??!!? Of course the lyrics are dodgy, but in a loveably surreal and invariably touching way - they're all about the inexpressibility of emotion, right? RIGHT????????

FACT: "Oh you've got green eyes...." is the best pop lyric in the world EVER. Its banal, meaningless, ridiculous trite on the one hand; on the other, its just the most wonderfully druggy and stunningly emotive few words (when put in context) I've ever heard. It's the sound of falling in love, and you just can't beat it.

And, personally, I love that "I don't kiss when you're around" line from SOTN: it's bitter as fuck, and bitterness is one thing the Order excell at.

Lurve,

M.

Originally posted by martin fradley It just amazes me that New Order "fans" still bitch about Barney's lyricism this late in the day. What exactly did you fall in love with the band for??!!??!!? Of course the lyrics are dodgy, but in a loveably surreal and invariably touching way - they're all about the inexpressibility of emotion, right? RIGHT????????FACT: "Oh you've got green eyes...." is the best pop lyric in the world EVER. Its banal, meaningless, ridiculous trite on the one hand; on the other, its just the most wonderfully druggy and stunningly emotive few words (when put in context) I've ever heard. It's the sound of falling in love, and you just can't beat it.And, personally, I love that "I don't kiss when you're around" line from SOTN: it's bitter as fuck, and bitterness is one thing the Order excell at.Lurve,M.

Definitely agree about "Oh, you've got green eyes." One reason I don't like the original version is the line comes too soon.

Originally posted by martin fradley It just amazes me that New Order "fans" still bitch about Barney's lyricism this late in the day. What exactly did you fall in love with the band for??!!??!!? Of course the lyrics are dodgy, but in a loveably surreal and invariably touching way - they're all about the inexpressibility of emotion, right? RIGHT????????FACT: "Oh you've got green eyes...." is the best pop lyric in the world EVER. Its banal, meaningless, ridiculous trite on the one hand; on the other, its just the most wonderfully druggy and stunningly emotive few words (when put in context) I've ever heard. It's the sound of falling in love, and you just can't beat it.And, personally, I love that "I don't kiss when you're around" line from SOTN: it's bitter as fuck, and bitterness is one thing the Order excell at.Lurve,M.

Absolutely. The trouble is though that the banal can be excused to a certain extent, then he ruins it with something absolutely shite that detracts from the song as a whole and becomes the focus of the song, not the music. Take Every Little Counts for example. It is only seen as a joke because of that one line !

Slow Jam is ... err ... well, you know. ;)

As for Behind Closed Doors, I love this line:

"Please don't take my drugs away, I'm gonna give them up someday"

Great line, you have to admit that.

Oh and "Ooh you've got green eyes etc etc" is fantastic, I like the part in Trainspotting when Renton is going through Heroin withdrawal and Debbie(?) sings it to him. ;)

In my opinion, New Ordre's lyrics may be the weakest thing about their songs but then again, when you get songs as fantastic as "true Faith", "Perfect Kiss", "1963" , "All The Way" and "Loveless" for instance, I tend to shut off and forget about such slight shortcomings and just concentrate on wallowing in the great music....that to me makes perfect sense anyway. Nigel earlier mentioned the daft line in "Every little counts" ("....think you are a pig...... should be in a zoo") - and he has a point - the song is pretty enough by NO standarsd but then all the attention is diverted to that throwaway line which then detracts from the rest of the song. Likewise in "Your Silent Face" too, only difference here is Barney isn't giggling afterwards at the absurdity of his words as he did in "ELC".

Todd

Who cares about the lyrics? I listen to New Order because of the brilliant trombone playing and the quite excellent washboard solo's.

good one keeper. i for one have always been taken with gillian`s unrivalled kazoo playing skills...

The song is the weakest thing New Order have done. Not at all keen on the lyrics eithere!

It's funny how we differ over which lyrics are bad and which are good. It's all a matter of perception. I remember listening to "Age of Consent" with a friend, and when Barney sang, "You're not the kind that needs to tell me about the birds and the bees," my friend broke out laughing. He thought the words were ridiculous. I kinda liked them. I interpreted them to be intentionally tongue-in-cheek. I feel the same way about Slow Jam's lyrics.

every little counts is worse