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BBC takes Jesus to Manchester

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BBC's Jesus sings Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now http://media.guardian.co.uk/site/story/0,,1695198,00.html Ben Dowell Thursday January 26, 2006

Bez in Celebrity Big Brother

Bez: former Happy Monday and Celebrity Big Brother winner will play a disciple. Photograph: Andy Butterton/PA

The BBC plans to mark the crucifixion and resurrection of Christ this Easter with an hour-long live procession through the streets of Manchester featuring pop stars from The Stone Roses and Happy Mondays and featuring songs by The Smiths and New Order.

In the programme, called Manchester Passion, a character representing Jesus will sing the legendary Joy Division anthem Love Will Tear Us Apart before dueting his arch-betrayer Judas on the New Order hit Blue Monday, according to senior church sources involved in the production.

Mary Magdelene, the penitent whore of the New Testament, is also getting in on the act: she is being lined up to sing the Buzzcocks hit Ever Fallen in Love (with Someone You Shouldn't have) accompanied by a string band.

The climax of the event sees Jesus sing the Smiths classic song Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now as he is being flayed by Roman soldiers. He will then come face-to-face with his Roman prosecutor Pontius Pilate with the two of them singing a duet of the Oasis hit Wonderwall and its chorus:

"I said maybe You're gonna be the one who saves me? And after all You're my wonderwall."

The broadcaster, which plans to show the event live on BBC3 on Good Friday, insisted the event was inspired by "the way Bach and other composers fused music and the Passion story".

The "contemporary retelling" of Jesus' last hours will begin with the messiah - who is yet to be cast - singing the Robbie Williams hit Angels, which will mark his procession into Jerusalem.

In this case, Jerusalem will be represented by Manchester's gay and red light area near Canal Street and the Passion scene will pass via Chinatown and St Peter's Square to culminate in Albert Square.

The march will be followed by members of the public who will be encouraged to join in the singing of relevant anthems, which include the M People hit Search for a Hero Inside Yourself.

The crowd will carry a large white cross and the public will also be asked to bring a symbol of their own burden - "something they are personally concerned about" - according to senior church sources involved in the programme.

The crowd will be joined by Bez - the entertainer famous for bashing his tambourine on stage with the Happy Mondays. He will be accompanied by former Stone Roses frontman Ian Brown and Black Grape saxophonist Martin Slattery.

The event will end with the resurrected Jesus singing an as yet undisclosed song from the top of Manchester's town hall.

The show is being made by the corporation's classical music television department, which has won plaudits for its experimental music and drama work overseen by its head, Pater Maniura.

These include Flashmob: the Opera - a live opera event staged among commuters at Paddington station in London in which members of the public performed a song inspired by the Orpheus legend - and the forthcoming Riot at the Rite, a dramatisation of the notorious first performance of Stravinsky's ballet the Rites of Spring, to be aired in March.

While the event is likely to raise eyebrows among more traditional-minded Christians, it has the broad support of both the Church of England and the Roman Catholic Church in the area.

Church of England spokeswoman Gillian Oliver said: "We are working with the BBC on this and are very pleased to be taking the good news of the gospel onto the streets of Manchester. If anything, something like this can translate the old story into new terms."

Canon Robin Gamble, canon evangelist at Manchester Cathedral, has been tasked with encouraging churchgoers to attend the event.

"I wouldn't know a Buzzcock from a ballcock so I couldn't really comment on the music. All I can say is that they are not doing a Christian service, it is a piece of contemporary theatre and that is going to get people to think about the story in modern terms," he said.

"It is going to come from the streets, with the sounds of traffic and people bustling around and it will make people think about this story in a new way. It is going to be challenging and shocking and is going to get things rumbling - it's going to be brilliant."

A BBC spokeswoman declined to comment on the details of the line-up but promised that the event would be "exciting".

· To contact the MediaGuardian newsdesk email editor@mediaguardian.co.uk or phone 020 7239 9857

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BY God is that horrible.

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ChrissMari wrote: BBC's Jesus sings Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now

i bet he was! nailed to that fuckin cross!

(allegedly) :ignore: forgive me father.

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This has so...got to be a joke???? :eek3:

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Jesus Christ!!

I'll be giving that a wide berth.

Some people just dont know where to stop

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Has Tony Wilson got something to do with this? :D

This sounds like someone trying to imitate Malcolm McLaren's Ghost Of Oxford Street, but a fcuked up Northern version!

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BA wrote: Some people just dont know where to stop

Can't be the first time someone's said this about our Mr Berry.

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:eek3:

link

The BBC is to mark Easter with an hour long procession through Manchester featuring the city's pop stars and music.

Manchester Passion will feature members of The Stone Roses and Happy Mondays and songs by The Smiths and New Order.

Jesus will sing Joy Division's Love Will Tear Us Apart before dueting with Judas on New Order's Blue Monday, according to Media Guadian.

The climax sees Jesus sing the Smiths' Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now as he is flailed by Roman soldiers.

He will then come face-to-face with Pontius Pilate with the two of them singing a duet of the Oasis hit Wonderwall and its chorus: "I said maybe, you're gonna be the one that saves me."

The event will end with the resurrected Jesus singing an as yet undisclosed song from the top of Manchester's town hall.

Former Happy Monday and Celebrity Big Brother winner Bez will play a disciple. He will be accompanied by former Stone Roses frontman Ian Brown and Black Grape saxophonist Martin Slattery.

The BBC plans to show the event live on BBC3 on Good Friday and says the idea was inspired by "the way Bach and other composers fused music and the Passion story".

Canon Robin Gamble, canon evangelist at Manchester Cathedral, commented: "I wouldn't know a Buzzcock from a ballcock so I couldn't really comment on the music."

But he said it would bring the story to people in a new way, adding: "It is going to be challenging and shocking and is going to get things rumbling - it's going to be brilliant."

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I think you're a bit late with the thread! :lol:

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Spotty's title was a little more relevant to the topic.

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BIGINOIL wrote:

BA wrote: Some people just dont know where to stop

Can't be the first time someone's said this about our Mr Berry.

yeah.. just something WRONG:blackeye:

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Marc wrote: I think you're a bit late with the thread! :lol:

I was in a hurry ;)

I did look, no thread seemed to be on the subject...

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:wtf: That's just not right. :thumbdown: Sounds more like a mockery trying to pass off as an "artistic celebration". :nono:

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Will Mr Wilson be playing God?

Snorri xxx

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After the first couple of paragraphs I thought NO WAY! This is too strange to be true. But maybe it's so strange that it kind of makes sense. The church wants to sell this story in a modern way.

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I'm very disapointed that 2 of my favourite songs will be associated with forcing outdated superstitious nonsense on the public. Do NO have to give permission for their songs to be used in this way?

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That's just...so strange. :nuts:

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If this truly gonna happen all my NO-records will be lost and burn in purgatory, I guess. What an awful thought... :cry:

By the way - who will play resurrected Jesus? It's not that Ian Curtis guy, is it?!

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Sounds like Jesus Christ - Manchester Star...

Who's gonna play the Thieves?

Unbelievable.

:scratch:

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Thought I was the only one who thought the whole idea is a pile of shite! Praise the Lord I'm not the only one.Will Christ be flanked by a procession of trannys as he marches up Canal Street. The whole thing comes across as "The Passion" as performed by LEGS AKIMBO! (League of Gentlemen)

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Or The Passion as performed by Don Mclean on CRACKERJACK!!!

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This is not a strange idea. It is a STUPID idea. Nothing against the story of the Passion. But this is just pure unadulterated CHEESE!

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And I thought i've 'seen it all' what a load of buzzcocks

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wrong on so many levels

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I'm sorry, but this has GOT to be a fucking joke - & not funny either:brow: :nono:

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This is the dummiest idea NO has backed in a long time.

No wonder the Chruch of England is less than 10% of the population and the "Religion of Peace"(tm) is reaching great proportions. Strange-oid promotions like this are just boneheaded.

Hey boys do NOt get involved in religion or politics..it will ruin your music and turn off your audeience

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What the fuck is going on?.. It's three month's til April fools Day.

Is this gonna popularise Christianity?.. COME ON.

I can see it being a massive 'faux pas' for the artists concerned. I can just see the Guardian review the next day.

Come on, own up..

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Got to be a joke - if not convieved as a joke it will become one - as will all the songs associated with it. "Taking offence' will gain a whole new level.

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:banghead: Is NOTHING sacred nowadays????.... those tunes taught me of love and loss, sacrifice and tolerance.

And CHRIST? Er. He a dead guy, right?

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Greg Levay wrote:

No wonder the Chruch of England is less than 10% of the population and the "Religion of Peace"(tm) is reaching great proportions. Strange-oid promotions like this are just boneheaded.

So, my only hope is that no one will go and see this piece of shite.

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WTF? WTF? WTF?

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Sher[gold]GOLD[/gold] Six wrote: WTF? WTF? WTF?

ah yes what can i possibly add to that. :D

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Somebody has got to do something to stop this. I have mailed a load of people at the BBC & have 1 reply so far which seems to confirm that it is happening (see below)

*********************** Vic McGlynn wrote:

oh it's too obvious....

I think it is happening you know, though in the nature of oddities happening up north, I would have put money on this being more of a scouse antic.

Weird.

I wrote:Thanks Vic.

Brown & Squire could end up rueing the day they wrote I Am The Ressurrection...

GJ

Vic McGlynn wrote: ah I haven't been told who Auntie is yet. I have to get my beeb stripes first.

I've forwarded to our muso news lot and hopefully they'll look into it, or start running the story.

I wrote:One would hope so, but why would the Guardian do it?

As an insider, can you ask Auntie please...

(:-(

GJ

Vic McGlynn wrote: But seriously....this is a wind up isn't it...? Isn't it?! For the love of god it had better be.

I wrote: To whom it may concern,

It's not April the 1st, but please tell me this is a joke:

http://media.guardian.co.uk/site/story/0,14173,1695198,00.html?gusrc=rss

As a passionate atheist, Darwinist & fan of New Order, I am aghast that: "The BBC plans to mark the crucifixion and resurrection of Christ this Easter with an hour-long live procession through the streets of Manchester featuring pop stars from The Stone Roses and Happy Mondays and featuring songs by The Smiths and New Order."

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Personally, I'm looking forward to it. An epic story with a Great soundtrack? Could be fun. Admittedly a lot of these songs are kind of "important" to those of us of a N/O persuasion, but their brilliance won't get ruined by a one-off. Personally i was more cheesed when Bowie's "Heroes" ended up on a Microsoft advert for months at a time. That did cheapen it. I notice that Metro newspaper gives this a mention today on page 15 with pictures of Barnie and Bez. They suggest : Touched by the Hand of God (nice) The Boy with the Spear in his side Blue Easter Monday Loose Fit(ting crown of thorns) Last Night I dreamt somebody cricified me. and one that might be right: I am the resurrection.

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:nuts: These trendy vicars,eh?

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This...frightens and confuses me :ignore:

While they're at it why not get the rabbit from Donnie Darko to hand out Easter Eggs to the kiddies? Fun for the whole family! :uhoh:

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*checks the calendar date* Okay, so we haven't just transported to April 1st? Cripes all friday, this sounds scary.

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This makes Rick Wakeman's ice show sound like a good idea.

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It's too disturbing. Be like watching a train wreck.

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I'm speechless about this. Who would have the nerves to think about such an event? Seriously? :brow:

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I've heard Jesus has been taking an active interest in music recently, after all his Dad is a DJ

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I see I'm not the only one who woke up this morning, heard about this and thought I'd left Earth via some portal on the stairs to a counter-Earth in an alternate reality universe where everything is roughly the same but with some wild alternative directions in destiny. This has to be heading for a big "Jerry Springer The Opera" blasphemy sh1tstorm from the believers of "The Intelligent Design". Don't believe it........yet, but given JD/NO/Factory/Manchester history there's an outside chance. I feel Mr Wilson's presence near this one.

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Looks as though its ruffling a few feathers.Sounds a bit of a laugh to me,tho it remains to be seen how corny it might get...Ian Brown for Jesus anyone?Mozzer for 30 pieces of silver perhaps?Brave mental idea,but interesting I reckon:nod: potentially embarrasing?Deffo.:laugh:

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Sorry people, but i think that's a glorious idea. You should be proud there in england of your church. I would like to see mr ryder going in front of the whole procession. He should sing kuff dam with this hilarious line: you see that jesus is a cunt. Maybe it would even be possible getting an american delegation (consisting of the christian death society) to be involved in this blasphemous thing ?

Happy Easter ! Dei Gloria Intacta

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What? is that a joke? We should be proud of the church of england? what the f*ck for? archaic, irrelevent nonsense? true artists rebel against authority and convention, they do not conform.

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i heard Laibach was pissed they were not invited

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You'd think if they were going to use New Order songs, they'd use ones that have SOMETHING to do with God, like say, Run Wild? My god..

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