Something good,I hope :shrug:

Just wrote this, let me know what you think ( , , or )

GREAT BOOKS I'VE NEVER READ: A HIGH-SCHOOLER'S HONEST OPINION

Dear Mr. Johnson,

You wanted me to read all these books to help my grade-point average, but Greg and "Wingman" were having a monster bash last night, so I hope this is alright. Go Pumas!

Moby Dick, Herman Melville: Yeah, I admit, I never read this one. Could barely make it through the movie (why did Gregory Peck look like Lincoln? Was that some sort of effort to make Honest Abe look crazy? I just don't get what the film-makers were hinting at). What's all this stuff about a whale? Is that supposed to be symobolism or something? Wait, dude, my pager's going off...

My Antonia, Willa Cather: Snoozed through the TV movie of this, with that guy from "Doogie Howser". I was disappointed and all, 'cause Mrs. Parker said it's a love story and all, and it was written by a chick, so you know what I'm thinking....Hot Lesbian Action! Then I see this flick, with a dude supposedly remembering all this...sucked ass!

Rabbit is Rich, John Updike: Up-dike? Shit, that's a good one....up-dike! Get it! Pretty funny, really.

Cry, the Beloved Country, Alan Paton: You mean Africa has white people? Damn, I did not know that. I thought maybe it was a misprint on the back cover, you know, "South Africa" when it was supposed to say "South America". And you mean these guys who were white pushed blacks around? Dude, that's not cool...but I still didn't read it.

Gravity's Rainbow, Thomas Pynchon: "A great streaking came across the sky"...great, what's the rest of the book supposed to be about? I don't get it. I thought this was about war or something (though I skipped ahead to the part where the two chicks are doing it. Sweet! Thumbs up or whatever!). Might have to catch the movie...

The Last of the Mohicans, Thomas F. Cooper: Saw the movie, it blew chunks. Chicks didn't even get naked or nothing, and they were hot, too.

Lolita, Vladamir Nabokov: This is the one about the creepy old guy who gets it on with a little girl, right? Well, it's kinda like that guy in "Dazed and Confused" said about high-school chicks: You get older, but they stay the same! Kinda gross, though.

The Naked and the Dead, Norman Mailer: Shit, you see how thick that thing was? To hell with that, I got football practice...

Jeremy "T-Dog!" Thompson Chester A. Arthur High School ("Fighting Pumas") Fort Needy, Ohio

I like your comment on Alan Paton's book, but you need to write some shit about Thomas Hardy's books like Tess, Jude, or Far From the Madding Crowd :barf:

Funny.

However, my aversion of lit classes back then is something I regret. My children will hate me at first when I force them to take every lit class they can.

Quite hilarious, since it reminds of my senior year in English when my class was assigned to read "Return of the Native" and "Beowulf" during the first month. However, James Fenimore Cooper, not Thomas F. Cooper, wrote "The Last of the Mohicans."

Originally posted by This blue-eyed boy that wants to be However, James Fenimore Cooper, not Thomas F. Cooper, wrote "The Last of the Mohicans."

I wish I could say that was an "intentional" mistake to emphasize the jock's stupidity, but I simply blanked on the name and came up with "Thomas" for some reason

Originally posted by Taboo # 7 > Originally posted by This blue-eyed boy that wants to be> However, James Fenimore Cooper, not Thomas F. Cooper, wrote "The Last of the Mohicans."

I wish I could say that was an "intentional" mistake to emphasize the jock's stupidity, but I simply blanked on the name and came up with "Thomas" for some reason I only remembered because I wrote a report on mid-19th century writers for my senior year history class, and Cooper just happened to have been mentioned a few times.