Sex Frog

A young lady goes into a pet shop to get herself an exotic pet. She looks around and sees a box of live frogs with a sign that says, "Sex Frogs $20--Guaranteed to work or Your Money Back."

She sheepishly says to the young man behind the counter that she would like to buy one of them. He boxes it up and tells her just to follow the instructions in the box.

When she got home she read the instruction and followed them exactly:

1. Take a shower
2. Put on nice perfume
3. Put on a sexy nightgown
4. Lay the frog down beside you on the bed
5. If there are any problems just call Bob at the store.

She laid there awhile and after nothing happened she called Bob at the pet store and told him the problem. He said for her not to worry he would be right over. When he arrived she said the frog just sits and there and I am very disappointed in my purchase. He said for her not to worry and turned to the frog. Bob picked up the frog and looked directly into his eyes and said very sternly, "Watch me. I am only going to show you how to do this one more time,"

A blonde finds out her husband is cheating, so she goes and buys a gun. Not long afterward, she walks into the bedroom and surprises her husband in bed with another woman. She goes and gets her gun, returns to the room, and points the gun at her head. Her husband jumps out of bed, pleading with her not to kill herself. She tells her philandering husband, "Shut up, you're next."