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Forget tits, Beer v Vagina

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This is an archived legacy thread. Replies are closed, but the discussion is preserved.

BEER VS VAGINA

Body: 1.Beer is always wet. Vagina needs a little work. One point to BEER

2.Warm beer tastes awful. One point to VAGINA

3.A really cold beer is satisfying. One point to BEER

4.If after taking a swig of your favourite beer you find a hair between your teeth, you may vomit. One point to VAGINA

  1. If you get home reeking of beer your wife may get mad, make a scene, kick you out, etc. If you get home reeking of vagina your wife may get mad, kick you out, even leave you. There's definitely a point to be had here, depending on your point of view and personal circumstances. I'll just call it a DRAW for the time being.

  2. Ten beers in one night and you can't drive home. Ten vaginas in one night and you don't want to drive anywhere. One point to VAGINA

  3. If you have a lot of beer in a public place, your reputation may suffer. If you eat any vagina in public, you become a legend. One point to VAGINA

  4. If a cop stops you and you smell of beer you may get arrested. If you smell of vagina he may buy you a beer. One point to VAGINA

  5. You normally don't find old beer. One point to BEER

  6. Too much beer and you'll think you see flying saucers. Too much vagina and you'll think you've seen God. One point to VAGINA

  7. Ripping off a beer bottle label is boring. Ripping off panties is fun. One point to VAGINA

  8. In most countries there's a tax on beer. One point to VAGINA

  9. If you have another beer the first one never gets pissed off. One point to BEER

  10. You can always be sure if you're the first one to open a bottle or a can. One point to BEER

  11. If you shake beer it'll get all agitated but eventually it settles down. One point to BEER

  12. With beer you always have choice: clear, dark, pilsner,ale,lager,etc One point to BEER

  13. You always know how much beer is going to cost One point to BEER

  14. Beer doesn't have a mother One point to BEER

  15. Beer never expects to be hugged for half an hour after you drink it One point to BEER

FINAL SCORE: BEER: 10 VAGINA: 8

That's it! The matter is settled, the clear winner is: BEER

PS: If you are a woman and at this point feel angry, degraded or discriminated against, just remember that Beer would experience none of those feelings, let alone express them, an extra point for BEER

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Funny. I mean, you;re dead meat when the vik-ettes get you, but funny noe the less.

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Knob.

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How fortunate for you that the winner is beer. Seems like that's the right direction for you to take.:abovelol:

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Eh, I'm going for the underdog. :thumb:

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i swear i saw this somewhere on another forum

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Two tastes that taste great together.

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I guess I saw God driving a flying saucer once.

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When I was younger, I was more of a vagina man.

Now when I'm older, I'm more a beer man.

:spit:

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go for the vagina every time. :clap:

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I can get a beer anytime, which makes vagina much more desirable.

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AgentWood wrote: go for the vagina every time. :clap:

Nothing stops from doing BOTH at the same time ;)

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Time for Agent Wood or Maya to make a Dick vs. Bon Bons thread :D

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Spotnick wrote:

AgentWood wrote: go for the vagina every time. :clap:

Nothing stops from doing BOTH at the same time ;)

When my ex came for a visit, we opened a bottle of--what else?-- champagne. She stopped taking care of, uh, business long enough to take a sip of champagne, then went back to business.

Ouch.

Alcohol in urethras... :nono:

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Comrade Shampanyov wrote:

Spotnick wrote:

AgentWood wrote: go for the vagina every time. :clap:

Nothing stops from doing BOTH at the same time ;)

When my ex came for a visit, we opened a bottle of--what else?-- champagne. She stopped taking care of, uh, business long enough to take a sip of champagne, then went back to business.

Ouch.

Alcohol in urethras... :nono:

vaginal beer bongs yummmmm

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I prefer shampanya.

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Comrade Shampanyov wrote:

Spotnick wrote:

AgentWood wrote: go for the vagina every time. :clap:

Nothing stops from doing BOTH at the same time ;)

When my ex came for a visit, we opened a bottle of--what else?-- champagne. She stopped taking care of, uh, business long enough to take a sip of champagne, then went back to business.

Ouch.

Alcohol in urethras... :nono:

nice ex you've got there Smirnie. who needs a new one when you've got an ex like that.

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She does have her charms.

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Comrad, you need to attend the Church of The Cramps. Chapter Stay Sick, All Women Are Bad.

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