60 replies · 1,666 views
I mean REALLY enjoy having a shit?
Having a piss is ok, but a big shit is fookin great.
I've just had a shit that would sink a battleship...I needed a smoke afterwards. And some chicken dippers.
Would that Freud cunt have something to say about this?
Or just maybe my head is not right coz I went to a Catholic school....and have had 2 bottles of wine.
Interesting thread, must say a Shit is ace. What loo roll do you use?
I'm a Tesco own brand man, cheap but I only wipe my arse on it.
i like to read maps when i go bog i try and judge how long i'll be ,so i know if to take a chunky world atlas or just a small u.k.road map
A good loo roll does let you relax, knowing there arent going to be any problems post-poo. So I invest it decent paper. Basildon bond... with my address in the top right corner.
As for reading materials, I tend not to bother. Shitting time is thinking time. Per chance, to shit, to dream.
there is nowt wrong with enjoying a good clay pipe clear out. unless of course it happens to turn into a nightmare on shite st. you know the ones im on about,the ones that start out good n solid then suddenly turn into a gallon of bisto gravy spraying fleks of kak all over the bowl and guts a churning followed by the self pitying look in the mirror whilst washing ure hands.
and lets not forget the horror of the "its to big" poop. you sit there thrutching and thrutching till like a particle of light passing over the event horizon of a black hole your turd makes a lunge for the outside world only then do you realise its twice the size of your rectum.
and im sure you all know about having a dump ,the morning after a vindaloo curry?
but the worst of all has to be the lumpy gravy dump that disguises itself as a fart,it encorages you ,nay begs you to give it a good hard pumping into the atmosphere only to leave you sat in a mess.
shit stinks:p
bansheeman wrote: i like to read maps when i go bog i try and judge how long i'll be ,so i know if to take a chunky world atlas or just a small u.k.road map
No, absolutely not.
It is natural and people should enjoy it more. Maybe people could form a shit club to serve the Manchester city community, and call it erm, Manchester City.
On second thoughts somebody's already done that!
I've finished many great works of American literature while on the can 
There's the "good shit", which is basically a nice, relaxed "oh, perhaps I'd better" which is relaxed and you could get to the toilet a few minutes from now. Those are nice...
Then there's the "Sweet Mother of God I will fucking run over you if you don't get out of my way did I have to eat an entire pizza on break? Man, wouldn't you know the stall's out of paper? Why is that guy passing a note to me? Oh my god, I need to get the fuck outta here!"...diarehtic shit 
Those, I hate 
Barney Army wrote: I mean REALLY enjoy having a shit?
Having a piss is ok, but a big shit is fookin great.
I've just had a shit that would sink a battleship...I needed a smoke afterwards. And some chicken dippers.
Would that Freud cunt have something to say about this?
Or just maybe my head is not right coz I went to a Catholic school....and have had 2 bottles of wine.
Listen to me you little piece of shit, not only you've managed to screw my email account tonight by sending the same stuff 4 fookin times (when will you ever learn that it's the quality and NOT the quantity that matters!!?)
but it also says it's 100% full now and I'm afraid I can no longer receive any more emails ... for now. And I have no friggin idea what to do now cause it looks like it's been blocked, aaaaggghhhh!!! Just d/l the stuff now btw and on a 'enjoying big shit' note, Freud would have probably said something like 'all the men are potential homosexuals then'.
What's yours like? 
Royser wrote: sometimes having a piss in better than just OK. isn't it?
actually yes. Particularly those stinky brown pisses after a real good day on the lash....ahhhhh
But why do they always coincide with the 'hangover horn'?
very difficult.
Ha, what a great thread. I love these philosophical discussions. I'm only replying to this to get my count up!!
I, of course, am a lady and don't do toilet things, same as the Queen.
a friend of mine is very long when he is having a shit... so, he takes the news and puts the music on (surely to interfere with the sound of... you get what I mean)...
I told him last time that it was impossible to me to poo while NO/JD songs were on...
what about you ?
This is a great thread been laughting my head of in work oh yeah i had a shit in our sink in work about 3weeks ago was a fookin nightmare nearly lost me balance and had to wipe me arse with this rough hand towel fookin killed me arse good job it was a sloppy one otherwise it would not have gone down the plug hole.
True Blue wrote: Oh yeah - girls don't do poos, do they...!?!!
Chris
Personally I can't imagine a girl having one. I mean, just try to imagine the hottest girl you can, then try to see her on the toilet having a grunt. Doesn't work man, just doesn't.
Myself, I do enjoy a good one. Have to start my day everyday or it just doesn't feel right. I to have read many great books while sitting in there, gotta have something to do, otherwise I talk to myself and that's just weird.
There was one about a year ago in the toilets at work that was incredible...thicker than a beer can and just enormous
It was a source of wonder and amusement amongst the lads.A total non flusher!Whoever laid that log, must have been a 30ft giant of a man..
mike powell wrote: there is nowt wrong with enjoying a good clay pipe clear out. unless of course it happens to turn into a nightmare on shite st. you know the ones im on about,the ones that start out good n solid then suddenly turn into a gallon of bisto gravy spraying fleks of kak all over the bowl and guts a churning followed by the self pitying look in the mirror whilst washing ure hands.
and lets not forget the horror of the "its to big" poop. you sit there thrutching and thrutching till like a particle of light passing over the event horizon of a black hole your turd makes a lunge for the outside world only then do you realise its twice the size of your rectum.
and im sure you all know about having a dump ,the morning after a vindaloo curry?
but the worst of all has to be the lumpy gravy dump that disguises itself as a fart,it encorages you ,nay begs you to give it a good hard pumping into the atmosphere only to leave you sat in a mess.
shit stinks:p
C'mon: it's just taking a shit. Everyone does it - guys, attractive girls, Andy Fletcher, and Hooky.
My entire nether regions are in such a state that having a shit that isn't complicated and unsatisfying is rare. Once in a while, i sit down and park a Soviet missile sub in the U-bend, and it may have been weeks since the last one, and it truly is a moment of sheer unbridled joy, I stand up afterwards and actually feel lighter.
I dunno tho, for sheer pleasure it's gotta be the pee you've held on to for so long you may have caused yourself medical harm.
Incidentally, Campbell's Fourth law states that the Intensity of the desire to piss is inversely proporional to the distance from the pissing recepticle. That being, that even tho you last 40 mins in the car, and could have gone 50, now that you're at the door, if that bastard isn;t out in 2 mins you're gonna die. By the time you're at the bog itself, it's more like, if you can;t get your zip down in 9 seconds you'll actually piss yourself.
Hey, let's face it most threads on ere are ultimately shit, this one's just being upfront about it :)
so you think its wrong to enjoy having a shit eh? before i go any further i apologise for any offence suffered by anyone about to go to the link but you have been warned. and moderators feel free to remove if u wish. http://www.shiteaters.com/ ill never look in the bowl again.
