THE Maltesers Appreciation Thread

yum!

I thought you'd gone to bed!

Very fond of malteasers...They were always Nanna's easter present"much better than ripp off easter eggs" she'd say..And they are

Few things in life must strike fear into the hearts of health care professionals like 1 ward of 10 kids half of which have just taken delivery of those battleship magazine sized boxes of maltesers. not only will all out war ensue, but the filthy wee bastards eat em off the floors (the ones that haven't coated the medicine trolley and all the visitor's feet.

great things, but you have to go easy, overdo t and you'll lose the coating on your tounge

After the recent controversy of the Marmite debate, its good to see a subject we can all agree on. I feel like having a Malteser-Marmite sandwich. ;)

I want to be Mrs Malteser (swoon)...

although i'm a bit fickle, i got engaged to a Crunchie last month.

Yeah, and what about midget, he's running round heartbroken, distraught....you still keep the name despite the divorce.

i like a white chocolate malteser they're quite yummy

Steve Campbell wrote: Yeah, and what about midget, he's running round heartbroken, distraught....you still keep the name despite the divorce.

Ha, i only just got that! I'm like, erm Missy Midget, Midget Missy... oh right! Got there in the end.

I have to say in my defence, he did knock me about and he shagged my next door neighbour.

farm life in deepest Bolton eh!!

john kershaw wrote: farm life in deepest Bolton eh!!

My sisters my mother and that's why i'm blind.

:dead:

My dog TASHA loves these. me-i prefer WHOLE NUT

They remind me of big Rabbit Droppings

Mick, Tracey say's we can send you a bag of Rabbit Dropping's if you like ?

i love maltesers. i just like to suck, suck, suck 'em dry.

get those dirty thoughts out of your minds!

i cant stand them.they are even more awful than marmite

BASTARD! Get back to dipping bread in OXO!!

Maltesers..oh yes! Not only do they taste fit,you can flick 'em across the table,or you can play table rugby.

Christy are you good at sucking !

monty wrote: BASTARD! Get back to dipping bread in OXO!!

Maltesers..oh yes! Not only do they taste fit,you can flick 'em across the table,or you can play table rugby.

we didnt DIP the bread into oxo.we ripped bread up up and floated it in oxo -- poor man's crotons actually maltesers would have floated too

one of the interesting properties of maltesers is that when launch from a catapult, they can maintain their integrity in the "breach" to a pressure that enables them to hit walls with a velocity that makes them vanish save for a small choccymalty spot! Ah, the engineering and force bearings properties of confectionary, another degree i could have done :(

Steve Campbell wrote: one of the interesting properties of maltesers is that when launch from a catapult, they can maintain their integrity in the "breach" to a pressure that enables them to hit walls with a velocity that makes them vanish save for a small choccymalty spot! Ah, the engineering and force bearings properties of confectionary, another degree i could have done :(

Think you're in the wrong job mate. You could be a rich professor or summat.

Maltesters are definitely one of my choccy faves. I never buy a bag of maltesers anymore - only the boxed ones now. The last bag I bought had about five maltesers in it. Very disappointing :(

Samantha Chapman wrote: Maltesters are definitely one of my choccy faves. I never buy a bag of maltesers anymore - only the boxed ones now. The last bag I bought had about five maltesers in it. Very disappointing :(

They taste better from a box for some reason, like chips do from a wrapper. My friend bought a box the other day and it had this little hole in it so you can only get one out at a time. It must be a diet version.

PS: Love your avatar, i am green with envy!

Missy Jem wrote:

Steve Campbell wrote: one of the interesting properties of maltesers is that when launch from a catapult, they can maintain their integrity in the "breach" to a pressure that enables them to hit walls with a velocity that makes them vanish save for a small choccymalty spot! Ah, the engineering and force bearings properties of confectionary, another degree i could have done :(

Think you're in the wrong job mate. You could be a rich professor or summat.

ROFLMAO, you'll like this..... I got tarred wth the name 2professor" sometime around the age of about 7 or 8. I've never been entirely sure, but classmates later told me variously that it was cos i dismembered and more-or-less reassembled the teacher's alarm clock (big acme cartoon type), or that it was because even at that age, I would correct the teacher (or at least add brackets to what they said).

To this day if I'm in the pub or wandering the streets at that certain time of night, it's not uncommon to hear the duclet tones of "alright prof ya mad cunt". wafting on the breeze.

digital mike binoche wrote: Christy are you good at sucking !

no one's complained. in fact, no one seems to remember their name afterwards. hmmm.

Missy Jem wrote:

Samantha Chapman wrote: Maltesters are definitely one of my choccy faves. I never buy a bag of maltesers anymore - only the boxed ones now. The last bag I bought had about five maltesers in it. Very disappointing :(

They taste better from a box for some reason, like chips do from a wrapper. My friend bought a box the other day and it had this little hole in it so you can only get one out at a time. It must be a diet version.

PS: Love your avatar, i am green with envy!

Yeah, they do taste better from a box! I haven't seen the Diet version of the box yet...I'd have to rip the box to shreads

BTW, thanks for your kind words about my avatar!

AgentWood wrote: i love maltesers. i just like to suck, suck, suck 'em dry.

get those dirty thoughts out of your minds!

gulp!!!

By 'eck Kershaw you've really got the hang of these smileys now!

yeah girl. its all runnin smoooothly mannnnnn!!!!

just wish i knew how to upload a picture into a reply now. got jealous of you lot puttin pictures of gorgeous newsreaders in a reply. well, maybe not you. coz ur probably more into the trevor mcdonald type of newsreader.

Or... no newsreaders at all. You see i'm a strange sorta girl, i've never fancied a newsreader in me life. I fancy rock and film start. Weird that innit?

Y'know I've never asked a girl what she though of such and such a band or such and such a movie, and NOT had the answer involve what she'd do to some bloke involved. No shaggable male, no reaction.

Steve Campbell wrote: Y'know I've never asked a girl what she though of such and such a band or such and such a movie, and NOT had the answer involve what she'd do to some bloke involved. No shaggable male, no reaction.

Now, now, don't be like that. I usually gauge a band by hearing them on the radio, in which case i've not a chuffin clue what they look like. So there.

Smart arse.

well I've never asked YOU have I.

:D

Steve Campbell wrote: well I've never asked YOU have I.

True. I'll let you off (like the fart that you are)

:D

Why, I oughtta put you over my knee but we've not been formally introduced. (and besides, y'might like it :) )

here's a more on topic one but.....what u reckon....are the maltesers ion a packet of revels just diverted from the main malteser training grounds, or are they special elite revels-grade maltesers.

Well they taste exactly the same, but good point. How do they get the chocolate on a malteser without there being a flat bit where it's sat?

It's kept me awake for years that i tell you!