I need some advice, because I don't want to continue making an ass out of myself. Basically, this girl I haven't seen in over a year and a half wants me to meet her at a mall in downtown Philly just to "hang out." Two summers ago, we went on a few "dates," although she was currently seeing another guy. However, the last time I saw her, we were at a club and she brought two other guys, who were far cooler than I was and she ignored or disparaged me for most of the night for being "out of place." But, recently, she found me online and we started talking again. She wants to meet up on Wednesday and I agreed to it, but I don't want to make an ass out of myself. For some reason, I still feel a bit angry with her, but I don't want to make an ass out of myself by seeming resentful. I don't know what to do. I know this might seem like teenager-drama-shit, but should I just not go? Or should I go and just shove any anger down, even if she might bring another guy along?
Some advice, please?
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Depends. On the one hand, she wants to see you. You're not out contacting her, she found you and re-established the relationship. So there's something there. 
On the other hand, if she wants to meet just so she can introduce you to, say, yet another guy that's getting to do things to her that you could only wish for, and you end up feeling like shit because you went, it'll suck 
I think you have to follow your instincts on this, in the end. This is coming from the guy who normally bitches about how he can't get a woman, but check out my "not a miserable bastard" thread and you'll see that I'm in an optimistic mood tonight. Thus, I say wing it, go with your gut. Then hunt me down and punch me in the nutsack if it doesn't work out. I would expect nothing less :p
Good luck whatever you do 
Go see her. The worst you can do is make an ass of yourself, at which point you'd be no worse off in the relationship department than you are now. Oh, and ply her with some drinks while you're at it. If you can get her tipsy and not hanging onto another guy, then she'll probably let slip some indication of how she feels about you. If alcohol is not involved, still go see her, because she may be giving you another chance. Sometimes women like the dreadfully nervous, slightly off-kilter, and attractively virginal young man whom they go to know online. Speaking from experience.
His Holiness, The Pope wrote: Go see her. The worst you can do is make an ass of yourself, at which point you'd be no worse off in the relationship department than you are now. Oh, and ply her with some drinks while you're at it. If you can get her tipsy and not hanging onto another guy, then she'll probably let slip some indication of how she feels about you. If alcohol is not involved, still go see her, because she may be giving you another chance. Sometimes women like the dreadfully nervous, slightly off-kilter, and attractively virginal young man whom they go to know online. Speaking from experience.
I can't give her alcohol. She's 18 and doesn't have a fake ID. We're just going to a mall to chill, but I still have a strange feeling that she's just going to think I'm a boring dork again.
This blue-eyed boy that wants to be wrote: I need some advice, because I don't want to continue making an ass out of myself. Basically, this girl I haven't seen in over a year and a half wants me to meet her at a mall in downtown Philly just to "hang out." Two summers ago, we went on a few "dates," although she was currently seeing another guy. However, the last time I saw her, we were at a club and she brought two other guys, who were far cooler than I was and she ignored or disparaged me for most of the night for being "out of place." But, recently, she found me online and we started talking again. She wants to meet up on Wednesday and I agreed to it, but I don't want to make an ass out of myself. For some reason, I still feel a bit angry with her, but I don't want to make an ass out of myself by seeming resentful. I don't know what to do. I know this might seem like teenager-drama-shit, but should I just not go? Or should I go and just shove any anger down, even if she might bring another guy along?
If she trated you like that- i'd tell her to fuck off. No person who can me that mean and horrible to you, especially in front of other guys, is a decent girl. Even if she wants to make up with you- she must be a cow to behave like that in the first place.
I've never been horrible to anyone like that- even if i don't want to be with them. The past is the past. You can't go back. Look to the future. There's someone nice out there who will like you for you!
Merry Christmas and a Happy 2006.
Bonzette
it doesn't get any easier as you get older trust me. you will never never know if you don't have a go.
If your idea of a date is hanging out in a shopping centre, I don;t blame her for thinking yer a dork. If it' HER idea...wow....that one's up to you.
Ditch the bitch and go racing. Seriously, she appears just want to use you as a prop. Worse yet, just as a friend. And friends don't shaft friends. Never ever be afraid to ask anyone out. Life is too short to be alone.
Like I said last night, if it doesn't work out you can hunt me down and kick me in the nuts. I'll even post my home address here if you need directions. I am that confident that you will need to do so if you follow whatever advice I gave you 
Having been "the friend that gets shitted on while she's got her tongue rammed down another guy's throat" before, I can understand your ambivilance about going. But sometimes never knowing is worse than finding out.
Either way, you can kick a total stranger in the nuts if it blows up in your face. That's what I call a no-lose situation 
Steve Campbell wrote: If your idea of a date is hanging out in a shopping centre, I don;t blame her for thinking yer a dork. If it' HER idea...wow....that one's up to you.
It was her idea. I'm not one for hanging around in malls, but she's underage and because my mother will probably be home from work, my mother's house is off limits. There's also snow on the ground, so you really can't wander around a whole lot outside.
If going to the mall means you don't have to rely on her for transportation, you might as well meet up with her, since there's really nothing to lose. And then if she starts acting mean, you can just ditch her. Good luck!
Sounds like either 1) she's using you as a meal ticket, 2) someone to make up the numbers,so she can be seen around a bunch of blokes=popular girl (?)
She wants to grow up a bit,I'd challenge her to what she thinks of you,in a nice way of course.I may be wrong,she rang you!
Well to quote various quiz hosts:
"You've gotta be in it, to win it"
mind you:
"There's nothing in this game for two in a bed"
Go!
If you don't, you will always wonder what might have been.
Two summers ago she was only 16. She has probably grown up a bit since then. Didn't most of us do something we regret when we were 16?
But play it cool! That way you can keep your dignity in tact if it turns out she's wasting your time.
Good luck and if you go we want to know all the details!
you obv want to, so go.
But be cool. If its shit. Go home.
But if she doesnt like New Order....
And likes Depeche Mode........
Stick a silver dagger through her heart.
Barney Army wrote: you obv want to, so go.
But be cool. If its shit. Go home.
But if she doesnt like New Order....
And likes Depeche Mode........
Stick a silver dagger through her heart.
I happen to like Depeche Mode. I doubt she's heard of New Order. Most people around my age in my area haven't. I just need to be glad if I find anyone who loathes the top 40 as much as I do.
Since we haven't heard back, I'd say the security guards at the mall are still trying to hose those two apart.
Naah, who am I kidding? This is Blue Eyed Boy. Right now he's admiring Martin Gore's gold lame shorts.
Anyway, my (late) two cents: Give her a chance, but don't be her doormat. If she starts to misbehave again, call her on it.
And honestly, I don't know what you mean when you say these other guys were cooler than you. My guess is you're light years ahead of them music-wise. That makes you cooler. And she obviously sees something in you, or she wouldn't be bothering.
I have a good feeling about those crazy kids...of course, I had a good feeling about New Coke, Michael Jackson's Blood On The Dancefloor album, and the election of George W. Bush. So what the hell do I know?
Nothing happened. She showed up with her current boyfriend and a few other friends and we just hung around in downtown Philly. Her boyfriend had decent taste in music, so I talked with him a bit. She didn't ignore me like the last time at the club, so I didn't become a resentful bastard.
I'm actually glad she brought her boyfriend. Now I know she wasn't taking an ugly bastard like me on a pity date.
Arrange to meet her somewhere that you can spy on. If you clock her with another bloke, leg it!
This blue-eyed boy that wants to be wrote: Nothing happened. She showed up with her current boyfriend and a few other friends and we just hung around in downtown Philly. Her boyfriend had decent taste in music, so I talked with him a bit. She didn't ignore me like the last time at the club, so I didn't become a resentful bastard.
I'm actually glad she brought her boyfriend. Now I know she wasn't taking an ugly bastard like me on a pity date.
Here's where you went wrong: you didn't show up naked except for a giant heart covering your chest, with the emblem "Please Please Please Love Me!" on it. Do that the next time...and you're in!
Remember: I give terrible advice :p
Taboo # 7 wrote:
This blue-eyed boy that wants to be wrote: Nothing happened. She showed up with her current boyfriend and a few other friends and we just hung around in downtown Philly. Her boyfriend had decent taste in music, so I talked with him a bit. She didn't ignore me like the last time at the club, so I didn't become a resentful bastard.
I'm actually glad she brought her boyfriend. Now I know she wasn't taking an ugly bastard like me on a pity date.
Here's where you went wrong: you didn't show up naked except for a giant heart covering your chest, with the emblem "Please Please Please Love Me!" on it. Do that the next time...and you're in!
Remember: I give terrible advice :p
I don't think that's going to work. There are, indeed, other girls in the world. Unfortunately, I'm invisible to about 100% of them.
This blue-eyed boy that wants to be wrote:
Taboo # 7 wrote:
This blue-eyed boy that wants to be wrote: Nothing happened. She showed up with her current boyfriend and a few other friends and we just hung around in downtown Philly. Her boyfriend had decent taste in music, so I talked with him a bit. She didn't ignore me like the last time at the club, so I didn't become a resentful bastard.
I'm actually glad she brought her boyfriend. Now I know she wasn't taking an ugly bastard like me on a pity date.
Here's where you went wrong: you didn't show up naked except for a giant heart covering your chest, with the emblem "Please Please Please Love Me!" on it. Do that the next time...and you're in!
Remember: I give terrible advice :p
I don't think that's going to work. There are, indeed, other girls in the world. Unfortunately, I'm invisible to about 100% of them.
I'm another girl in this world. I live in Philly. My vision is also pretty good, when I remember to put my contacts in ;)
ChrissMari wrote:
This blue-eyed boy that wants to be wrote:
Taboo # 7 wrote:
This blue-eyed boy that wants to be wrote: Nothing happened. She showed up with her current boyfriend and a few other friends and we just hung around in downtown Philly. Her boyfriend had decent taste in music, so I talked with him a bit. She didn't ignore me like the last time at the club, so I didn't become a resentful bastard.
I'm actually glad she brought her boyfriend. Now I know she wasn't taking an ugly bastard like me on a pity date.
Here's where you went wrong: you didn't show up naked except for a giant heart covering your chest, with the emblem "Please Please Please Love Me!" on it. Do that the next time...and you're in!
Remember: I give terrible advice :p
I don't think that's going to work. There are, indeed, other girls in the world. Unfortunately, I'm invisible to about 100% of them.
I'm another girl in this world. I live in Philly. My vision is also pretty good, when I remember to put my contacts in ;)
Maybe you the two of you could....
This blue-eyed boy that wants to be wrote: I'm actually glad she brought her boyfriend. Now I know she wasn't taking an ugly bastard like me on a pity date.
Pshaw. You're way too hard on yourself. You're a good-looking guy. Not that I'm gay. Not that there's anything wrong with being gay.
You have a lot to offer to the right girl. Try being more realistic-- more positive-- about yourself, and your chances with women will improve exponentially.
ChrissMari wrote:
This blue-eyed boy that wants to be wrote:
Taboo # 7 wrote:
This blue-eyed boy that wants to be wrote: Nothing happened. She showed up with her current boyfriend and a few other friends and we just hung around in downtown Philly. Her boyfriend had decent taste in music, so I talked with him a bit. She didn't ignore me like the last time at the club, so I didn't become a resentful bastard.
I'm actually glad she brought her boyfriend. Now I know she wasn't taking an ugly bastard like me on a pity date.
Here's where you went wrong: you didn't show up naked except for a giant heart covering your chest, with the emblem "Please Please Please Love Me!" on it. Do that the next time...and you're in!
Remember: I give terrible advice :p
I don't think that's going to work. There are, indeed, other girls in the world. Unfortunately, I'm invisible to about 100% of them.
I'm another girl in this world. I live in Philly. My vision is also pretty good, when I remember to put my contacts in ;)
I'm impressed. I don't think I know too many people who know who New Order is in Philly. I remember playing some of Substance for these kids I used to do service learning with back when I was in high school. They asked, "New World Order?" "No, New Order - like 'Blue Monday.'" "I thought Orgy did that about 4 years ago." And there you have it. Outside of those in the Philly goth scene, no one knows who New Order is.
This blue-eyed boy that wants to be wrote:
I'm impressed. I don't think I know too many people who know who New Order is in Philly. I remember playing some of Substance for these kids I used to do service learning with back when I was in high school. They asked, "New World Order?" "No, New Order - like 'Blue Monday.'" "I thought Orgy did that about 4 years ago." And there you have it. Outside of those in the Philly goth scene, no one knows who New Order is.
hrm.
I don't think that's 100% true at all. There are many many people around here who are into New Order who aren't all up in Digital Ferret and all that crap. I know many. Also, the Philly Goth Scene (like really that of any city) is annoying so I don't know if I'd use that as the bastion of musical taste in Philadelphia.
Also, you shouldn't be impressed or not impressed with other people's (or your own) tastes in music it comes off as snobby. fwiw.
Ladies and gentlemen, I think we've got a potential love connection on NOOL 
Put some Barry White on the turntable and watch the magic happen.......or not
ChrissMari wrote:
This blue-eyed boy that wants to be wrote:
I'm impressed. I don't think I know too many people who know who New Order is in Philly. I remember playing some of Substance for these kids I used to do service learning with back when I was in high school. They asked, "New World Order?" "No, New Order - like 'Blue Monday.'" "I thought Orgy did that about 4 years ago." And there you have it. Outside of those in the Philly goth scene, no one knows who New Order is.
hrm.
I don't think that's 100% true at all. There are many many people around here who are into New Order who aren't all up in Digital Ferret and all that crap. I know many. Also, the Philly Goth Scene (like really that of any city) is annoying so I don't know if I'd use that as the bastion of musical taste in Philadelphia.
Also, you shouldn't be impressed or not impressed with other people's (or your own) tastes in music it comes off as snobby. fwiw.
I do agree that the Philly Goth scene is annoying, although because I'm friends with people in the scene, I occasionally wind up at their parties. But, I've never met anyone my age who likes New Order. I attended a Philly high school and grew up in a neighborhood off the expressway, and most people my age I encountered listen to rap and R&B or occasionally, I would meet someone who liked heavy metal. However, I don't even live in Philly for eight months of the year, so that's eight months taken away from the time I could be exploring the neighborhoods for New Order fans.
This blue-eyed boy that wants to be wrote:
ChrissMari wrote:
This blue-eyed boy that wants to be wrote:
I'm impressed. I don't think I know too many people who know who New Order is in Philly. I remember playing some of Substance for these kids I used to do service learning with back when I was in high school. They asked, "New World Order?" "No, New Order - like 'Blue Monday.'" "I thought Orgy did that about 4 years ago." And there you have it. Outside of those in the Philly goth scene, no one knows who New Order is.
hrm.
I don't think that's 100% true at all. There are many many people around here who are into New Order who aren't all up in Digital Ferret and all that crap. I know many. Also, the Philly Goth Scene (like really that of any city) is annoying so I don't know if I'd use that as the bastion of musical taste in Philadelphia.
Also, you shouldn't be impressed or not impressed with other people's (or your own) tastes in music it comes off as snobby. fwiw.
I do agree that the Philly Goth scene is annoying, although because I'm friends with people in the scene, I occasionally wind up at their parties. But, I've never met anyone my age who likes New Order. I attended a Philly high school and grew up in a neighborhood off the expressway, and most people my age I encountered listen to rap and R&B or occasionally, I would meet someone who liked heavy metal. However, I don't even live in Philly for eight months of the year, so that's eight months taken away from the time I could be exploring the neighborhoods for New Order fans.
...or women
This blue-eyed boy that wants to be wrote:
ChrissMari wrote:
This blue-eyed boy that wants to be wrote:
I'm impressed. I don't think I know too many people who know who New Order is in Philly. I remember playing some of Substance for these kids I used to do service learning with back when I was in high school. They asked, "New World Order?" "No, New Order - like 'Blue Monday.'" "I thought Orgy did that about 4 years ago." And there you have it. Outside of those in the Philly goth scene, no one knows who New Order is.
hrm.
I don't think that's 100% true at all. There are many many people around here who are into New Order who aren't all up in Digital Ferret and all that crap. I know many. Also, the Philly Goth Scene (like really that of any city) is annoying so I don't know if I'd use that as the bastion of musical taste in Philadelphia.
Also, you shouldn't be impressed or not impressed with other people's (or your own) tastes in music it comes off as snobby. fwiw.
I do agree that the Philly Goth scene is annoying, although because I'm friends with people in the scene, I occasionally wind up at their parties. But, I've never met anyone my age who likes New Order. I attended a Philly high school and grew up in a neighborhood off the expressway, and most people my age I encountered listen to rap and R&B or occasionally, I would meet someone who liked heavy metal. However, I don't even live in Philly for eight months of the year, so that's eight months taken away from the time I could be exploring the neighborhoods for New Order fans.
...or crimes to prevent in your superhero guise "The Golden-Shorts Boy" 
Comrade, we need to tag-team and council the young man on the ways of love...I'll go in first and try to pin him with a German suplex 
:p
Taboo # 7 wrote:
...or crimes to prevent in your superhero guise "The Golden-Shorts Boy"
If I wore Martin Gore length shorts in most of Philly's neighborhoods, I'd have the shit kicked out of me - at least. At my job, a customer threatened to "fuck [me] up," among other things, and that was just while I was in my normal uniform, let alone vinyl hoochie shorts.
ChrissMari wrote:
This blue-eyed boy that wants to be wrote:
I'm impressed. I don't think I know too many people who know who New Order is in Philly. I remember playing some of Substance for these kids I used to do service learning with back when I was in high school. They asked, "New World Order?" "No, New Order - like 'Blue Monday.'" "I thought Orgy did that about 4 years ago." And there you have it. Outside of those in the Philly goth scene, no one knows who New Order is.
Also, you shouldn't be impressed or not impressed with other people's (or your own) tastes in music it comes off as snobby. fwiw.
My Mum told me the other day that I was a 'music snob' 
no,should you fuck go.or if you do you should take two stunning girls with you to give her a taste of her own medicine.you sound like a sensitive guy and their are plenty of other ladies out there who wouldnt make themselves feel superior to you by being all look at all the guys i can pull.she sounds like a player and i really dont think you should play her games.dont go at all,its a little soul destroying and she sounds like those vampire types who need others to feel better about themselves by making others feel inferior and like arses.dont go,ignore her,she sounds like a freak,and meeting at the mall! haha,sounds like your teenagers.
y'know
y'all are a pile of muppets....the chap'sdate was like last week.
DO PAY ATTENTION 007('s)
My geography teacher used to read out this list of instructions that went .....
- write all this down then stare out the window and do nothing else
- stand on your table 3 touch your left foot with your right eyeball
- draw the andes from memory
there were about 40 things on the list andhe just sat there laughing his ballix off at us.
you all fail
BTW .....Anyone hear about this new thing calleda Rubick Cube?
Steve Campbell wrote: y'know
y'all are a pile of muppets....the chap'sdate was like last week.
DO PAY ATTENTION 007('s)
My geography teacher used to read out this list of instructions that went .....
- write all this down then stare out the window and do nothing else
- stand on your table 3 touch your left foot with your right eyeball
- draw the andes from memory
you all fail
BTW .....Anyone hear about this new thing calleda Rubick Cube?
Way to go, Cambo
Go.
Tell her how you feel; including the anger.
Give her one more chance... if she fucks you about again forget about her and ignore all future efforts of contact.
Taboo # 7 wrote: Comrade, we need to tag-team and council the young man on the ways of love...I'll go in first and try to pin him with a German suplex[
:p
Not that there's anything wrong with that.
lol... lacy.. if I was him and taking too stunning girls to make her jealous, I'd just take the three of us somewhere else...
I'm thinking we need a reality check..
I'm wondering if he's gonna buy a clue and start talking to the girl from Philly with whom so far all he's done is discuss the Goth music scene. I don't know much, but I do know talking about the Philly Goth scene is a good way of avoiding intimacy 
Not that I'm the dating expert or anything, but still...
First off, I don't have two "stunning" ladies to come with me. In fact, I only have one girl friend and she has her own boyfriend troubles. I only talked about the Philly Goth scene on here because it was part if a post response; the only people I seem to encounter who like NO happen to be through that scene.
But, it's all done. Things can go back to normal. I'll be going back to Boston in a week.
This blue-eyed boy that wants to be wrote: Things can go back to normal.
Man, you think things ever go back to normal around here?
In all seriousness, just because this didn't work out doesn't mean that you're a hopeless loser. Somewhere out there is a wonderful woman just waiting for a guy like you to come along. And as long as she doesn't see your avatar, it'll be smooth sailing :D
(I couldn't end that without a joke, could I? :p )
Anyway, keep on lookin', man. There's bound to be someone for ya
