how to cheer up

As you may have noticed, certain machinery started yanking my chain the moment I got up. I am now a much happier camper, here's how.

Made a HUGE pot of chillie (Actually I think "tirene" is the right word, tho "vat" would also do) using the last of the undrunk xmas wine (my stomach finaly called quits on me). Went out to get some extra's for it and met half my old college clas in te 50 yrds between house and shops....then got the most wonderful blast of fresh ocean with just a hint of fresh fish from the trawlers landing their first catch of the year...reminded me I actually LIKE this shitey little town.

Then Basil Fawlty at the offending machine from earlier...and YES, actually terrify it into working (If I had a penny for every time some moron sad "shouting at it and hitting it wont help", I'd buy a hammer to the hit the next one who said it with)....just by yelling and explaining that I'd rather burn it than return it under warrantee (it believed me).

And just for finals, as you sit down to NOOL, you see the following passing on the fortune program

1. X=Y ; Given
2. X^2=XY ; Multiply both sides by X
3. X^2-Y2=XY-Y^{2 ; Subtract Y}2 from both sides
4. (X+Y)(X-Y)=Y(X-Y) ;Factor
5. X+Y=Y ;Cancel out (X-Y) term
6. 2Y=Y ;Substitute X for Y, by equation 1
7. 2=1 ; Divide both sides by Y

The last proof of this I had required division by 0 this is MUCH better. It's the little things that make us gibbering maniacs happy.

BTW...get used to meposting crap like that.....until I reboot ( could be tomorrow, could be march)...that fortune cookie generator will be scrolling up my wallpaper and I ALWAYS feel morally obligated to share :D

You any good at Confidence Intervals Steve ?

ok....you got me..huh?

BTW...my wallpaper.....scrolling along the whole time....

I COULD get the "green screen" thingy to read out system logs or new or anything really....but I thout a constant stream of bullshit was more fitting for any machine I was sitting at :D

I've heard The Cure are good at cheering you up.:D

Well the sound of fat bob being lowered into hot cooking oil would certainly put a smile on me face.

Steve Campbell wrote: Well the sound of fat bob being lowered into hot cooking oil would certainly put a smile on me face.

Nothing wrong with Bobby Smith.

Speaking of which, have you seen him on the cover of the new DM album ' Playing The Angel'

Dave G has a voodoo doll of him then.

Good good good,,, like that :D

Steve, have you been smoking again ??

LOL

Add to the list of things to make you feel better..... "seeing Maya" bout ye ya mad bitch?

I think it's the painkillers really :D

I saw myself in a mirror first thing this morning and didn't cheer up

NObabe wrote: I saw myself in a mirror first thing this morning and didn't cheer up

That is the very LAST compliment i give you on these fora young lady :D

I was just thinking about the lovely Maya this morning.

Of course, I was listening at the time to a public radio story about Eastern European women being lured to Germany to work as prostitutes during the World Cup match.

Changing my name to Helga

'Oh Helga!!'

'Oh Hanz!'

'Ja, schneller bitte'

digital mike binoche wrote: You any good at Confidence Intervals Steve ?

a moment's googling reveals I DO know what they are after all....it's just part of my Additional Maths O' Level I tried to forget...in statistics it was anything beyond standard deviation I tuned out on. In pure maths I bailed on identities (prove that x=y...."ok...it says so here"). think I managed mechanics OK tho. Failed exam in the end.....party due to my tuning out, and partly due to the penis of a teacher who inspired me to do so (cunt used to CHEAT at equations on the board....especially when trying to show how thick we were for not being able to do last night's Identities homework.....a change of sign here.....something happening on one side of the equation only there.)

NObabe wrote: Changing my name to Helga

'Oh Helga!!'

'Oh Hanz!'

'Ja, schneller bitte'

I WAS gonna say.....you might get a few England fans as well, but then I thought....what woud you AFTER the first 4 days :D

yer going home yer goin home....england's goin home.

Gnu Odor wrote: I was just thinking about the lovely Maya this morning.

Of course, I was listening at the time to a public radio story about Eastern European women being lured to Germany to work as prostitutes during the World Cup match.

Lend us yer PZm....BTW did I tell you the Phantom power on my desk is global :D:D:D:D:D:D

Hi Steve glad your happier now - tureen is the word - I sometimes think you missed your vocation in life with all this prolific writing etc. Can't decide whether it should be publishing or politics - you being a Campbell I think either is fitting!

Aw you say the sweetest things. (unlike bog-gob Maya who can't even take a compliment :D:D:D:D)

Thing is...I cannot do serious at all, and the minute typing screeds of shite starts to smell like work, I'll go do something else :D

Hmmm politics you say? The thing is that the desire to become a politician should instantly preclude one from running.

I'd last about 3 weeks before I refused to play the game and the stories about me taking little boys to my country estate to engage in unnatural sexual practices invloving woodland creatures would start getting made up and sold....death to any career surely (except peter mandelson one assumes)

BTW cheers for the spelling help..I think I had "trireme" on the brain from watching the history channel obsessively over xmas. Don;t make a habit of it tho...if you devote your life to tracking down my brainfarts and typos, you'll die lonely, insane and too young.

Not necessarily so sweet - just trying to uphold the probably not so good name of the Campbell family - yes! my mother's side of the family are Campbells - I hope we're not related oh dear!

Have I upset you by telling you this, that wasn't the intention - I thought you would come back at me with some funny remark.

LOL NOPE....I'm half watching nool and half watching babylon5.

you know Campbell means "crooked mouth" don't you :D And Stephen means "prince or crowned one"

oh dear talk about giving a dog a bad name.

We aparently did something deeply impolite to the clan McDonald, invlolving them getting masacred for letting us crash at theirs....a mate of mine with that name said her mum was deeply suspicious of her speaking to me. LOL