Trevor

You gotta tell her how you feel before you lose any possible chance of getting her. Silence is consent.

that's more or less what i told him," you will never know unless you have a go."

When me son's get to dating age that is what I will tell them. So many other girls I should have asked out....

twist wrote: You gotta tell her how you feel before you lose any possible chance of getting her. Silence is consent.

He has no chance of getting her. She has a boyfriend. She's not going to dump the boyfriend for some other guy. If she wanted to do that, she'd have already done it. I speak from experience on this one. Been there, done that.

What will happen is she'll be flattered for about 60 seconds, followed by increasing discomfort and awkwardness between them. All of her friends at work-- everybody at work, really-- will know. Work will become so difficult that one of them will probably have to quit.

She's taken, and telling her he's in love with her isn't going to change that. Even if she's with a jerk, she'll stay with the jerk. Women who date jerks thrive on that drama at some level, and the poor outside guy who falls in love with her isn't going to change anything by going into savior mode.

What he needs to do is find somebody who's not already taken, and lavish his attentions on her.

Love it when people talk about me when I ain't here :p

Anyway, you can all rest easy; this is the one weekend she didn't work.

Comrade, I respect your opinion, but a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do. The odds are against me (I know), but the odds against me are even worse if I don't do anything.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to finish a paper about how "I am The Walrus" is the key to understanding a Salman Rushdie book. For school...

Taboo # 7 wrote: Love it when people talk about me when I ain't here :p

Anyway, you can all rest easy; this is the one weekend she didn't work.

Comrade, I respect your opinion, but a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do. The odds are against me (I know), but the odds against me are even worse if I don't do anything.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to finish a paper about how "I am The Walrus" is the key to understanding a Salman Rushdie book. For school...

Tabbsy, you ignorant sheep-shagging slut. I'm just saying I've already tried every angle there is in this situation, on more than one woman, and it JUST DOESN'T WORK. If it worked sometimes, I'd say that. It JUST DOESN'T WORK.

I've had to change jobs for my own sanity when I fell for a co-worker. She was with a guy who used to beat her up, and I thought if she could just see how much i cared about her, she'd leave him.

She didn't leave. She stayed with him. Even when he gave her two black eyes ("I was driving and looked over my shoulder and smacked my face into the window"). Even when he threw her through a window ("I was leaning on the window and it broke."). She wasn't the only woman I knew who dated a jerk. Women date jerks because they want to date jerks. Regardless of whatever words they're saying to the contrary. I knew a very sweet woman who was dating a guy who slept around constantly. Even when they were at the same party, he'd be in the bathroom shagging somone else while she was talking to me. Did she leave him for some more faithful guy? No. She married him.

I nearly had to drop my best friend when I fell for her. We're finally, a year after she got married, getting to a comfortable stage in our friendship. I did the same exact thing you "gotta do." Twice. When she told me she was dating some guy, I told her I was in love with her (to be fair, I had been trying to tell her, but she kept cancelling our dinner engagement, because she was, well, jsut starting to date the other guy). When she broke up with him the first time, she made it clear that she would never, ever go out with me. That she wasn't attracted to me. She even told me, years later, that if she could will herself to be attracted to me, she would. But she couldn't will herself to be attracted. And she says I'm an attractive guy. The second time I told her was the day before she got married. It wasn't romantic-- it was traumatic. We've finally moved beyond that fiasco, and are dear friends now, but there was a point where things were so bad between us that I swore I'd never talk to her again.

Tabbsy, a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do. And in your case, what you gotta do is find a muy bonita senorita-- Spanish for single girl, remember?

Nothing good can come of this. Wish I could spare you the pain and awkwardness you're about to inflict on yourself, but a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do. So after you tell her, and things go south, re-read all my words of experience in the other threads and find yourself a muy bonita senorita, ask her out before you fall in love, and if you like each other, things will progress on their own.

So that explains Taboo's avatar.

Man, I forgot how much fun it is having people speculate about my romantic life or lack thereof. Which is, it's no fun at all

(granted, I brought it up, but still...don't you people have better things to do with your time? )

Okay, yes, telling her could make things miserable between us. But things aren't that great right now anyway (I bolt for the milk shelf anytime her beau walks through the door, and our conversations of late haven't exactly been the greatest). I have two options here:

1.Being miserable because I can't tell her

2. Being miserable and telling her

Either way, I accept that she won't dump this guy anytime soon. But goddamit, I am sick and tired of being unable to say anything when someone I love ends up with a jerk.

So let's all get back to poopie jokes and "Fat Bob" inlsut threads, otay? I like it better when I'm not the subject of a thread ;)

Taboo # 7 wrote: Man, I forgot how much fun it is having people speculate about my romantic life or lack thereof. Which is, it's no fun at all

(granted, I brought it up, but still...don't you people have better things to do with your time? )

Okay, yes, telling her could make things miserable between us. But things aren't that great right now anyway (I bolt for the milk shelf anytime her beau walks through the door, and our conversations of late haven't exactly been the greatest). I have two options here:

Which means she probably has already figured it out, and her response tells you everything you need to know.

On the other hand when a woman's dating a jerk, and finds some othr guy she'd like to be with instead, she let's him know. She sends him signals. And a secret decoder ring to sort the signals out. Any guy who ain't getting signals from a girl who's taken is still getting a signal. If you get my meaning.

So let's all get back to poopie jokes and "Fat Bob" inlsut threads, otay? I like it better when I'm not the subject of a thread ;)

Oop,s missed this part. Sorry everybody. Your request, Brave Sir Trevor, is a reasonable one... For me to POOP ON!

Comrade Shampanyov wrote:

Taboo # 7 wrote: Man, I forgot how much fun it is having people speculate about my romantic life or lack thereof. Which is, it's no fun at all

(granted, I brought it up, but still...don't you people have better things to do with your time? )

Okay, yes, telling her could make things miserable between us. But things aren't that great right now anyway (I bolt for the milk shelf anytime her beau walks through the door, and our conversations of late haven't exactly been the greatest). I have two options here:

Which means she probably has already figured it out, and her response tells you everything you need to know.

On the other hand when a woman's dating a jerk, and finds some othr guy she'd like to be with instead, she let's him know. She sends him signals. And a secret decoder ring to sort the signals out. Any guy who ain't getting signals from a girl who's taken is still getting a signal. If you get my meaning.

So let's all get back to poopie jokes and "Fat Bob" inlsut threads, otay? I like it better when I'm not the subject of a thread ;)

Oop,s missed this part. Sorry everybody. Your request, Brave Sir Trevor, is a reasonable one... For me to POOP ON!

Things aren't great between us because I made a stupid comment about wanting to "attract college girls" in her company this week, because I was upset about Monday

I am a huge asshole for doing that, and I think she sorta let me know it a few days later. We haven't had a chance to speak since

But prior to that I was always the guy she talked to. So what the hell does that mean?

Anyway, thanks for the poopie joke. You, sir, are a gentleman who understands the way to a lady's heart is getting her into your hotel room on the false promise that you will return her missing glove to her...but only after she joins you for a nice glass of refreshing shampanyov :p

Taboo # 7 wrote: But prior to that I was always the guy she talked to. So what the hell does that mean?

Dunno. I don't have the decoder ring.

[Anyway, thanks for the poopie joke. You, sir, are a gentleman who understands the way to a lady's heart is getting her into your hotel room on the false promise that you will return her missing glove to her...but only after she joins you for a nice glass of refreshing shampanyov :p

Even if she's with a jerk, she'll stay with the jerk. Women who date jerks thrive on that drama at some level

Treat em mean, keep em keen.

Look, Trev has just one chance at this. the worst that can happen is a restraining order and a new job.

She was with a guy who used to beat her up, and I thought if she could just see how much i cared about her, she'd leave him.

Never dated damaged goods nor recommend it. Well once, in college. Got the phone call at 4 am. "I Know she is in there you bastard." I was totally shocked. He was supposed to be 300 miles away. How the fuck did he have the number to my dorm room? Yes she was there. It was like the second night she spent. How did he fagger this out so quickly? Spooky. I grabbed a bottle just incase I needed a weapon. He never did bother me again. But the stories she told of him were grim.

Good luck Trevor! You've got balls doing this...

twist wrote:

She was with a guy who used to beat her up, and I thought if she could just see how much i cared about her, she'd leave him.

bad bad news. ." I was totally shocked. He was supposed to be 300 miles away. How the Spooky. I grabbed a ..ere grim.

the space saving editting out here- definitely takes two to tango, though. she probably could've done something. everything worked out. with nobody getting killed, right?
and Trevor- maybe not helpful,but if you do just say yer- adlibbed, -look, I think you're great and want to be with you lines

maybe she will do a whoA 180 degrees and recognize where things are at. but where are they at? there are a 1000 little- just .. like.. and whole lot better than her it sounds like. but the point, true, only you do know where you- want- to- be. there are all these olde service men pinching, getting slapped, and kissing their sweeties into their 80s so- still a few more weeks. eh? -couldn't resist with the - eh. charm, good luck, style and confidence. doesn't sound like you really need it though.

Taboo # 7 wrote: sick with things. like it better when I'm not the subject of a thread

apologies.

JW wrote:

Taboo # 7 wrote: sick with things. like it better when I'm not the subject of a thread

sorry 'bout that.. apologies.you didn't ask - we voiced.

we so love talking about ya tabsy. it focuses us away from our own problems.

No dice today, went through her line but she seemed to be putting out a "don't even think of trying to tell me how you feel!" vibe

I did admit that I felt lousy when she asked me how I was. She responded that she felt the same way...

Anyway, just updating you on my love life :p ...Now get back to poop jokes and "would you date a Communist rabbit?" threads

bLuE oR, er, Comrade must admit he's baffled. Is she putting out those vibes because she knows what you're feeling and ain't interested, or is she feeling lousy because she has some feelings for you too, or is she fdeeling lousy because she knows what you're feeling and ain't interested, or is she feeling lousy because her boyfriend is giving her grief and she ain't interested in hearing about your feelings for her?

Comrade don't know.

Feeling nothing for nobody, Comrade would find a muy bonita...ahh, you know the drill.

In the end, I guess a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do. I'm sure you have a very touching speech worked up, Tabbsy... For me to POOP ON!

Bring on The Commie Rabbits

(I will make it my life's work to get that phrase into everyday vernacular)

Marc wrote: So that explains Taboo's avatar.

Hmm, I never even thought of that when I picked it. I was just sick of the Michael Palin photo that I had been using, but it makes sense.

Hopefully I'll turn out like Tim, eh?

:tbthog:

Who's Tim?

And JW-- Gotta fix that quote, it's bollixed up the thread...

Taboo # 7 wrote:

Comrade Shampanyov wrote:

Taboo # 7 wrote:

have better things to do with your time? ) probably - but.. just ..tripping into conversations and sometimes saying over the top ideas that hopefully sometimes make some sense..

things aren't that great exactly been the greatest:

.

.

:

Things aren't great -I am a huge asshole for doing that, why?

:p

all those not that greats.. ? that's a simple answer if ever there was one. maybe just have to switch the focus and the gears. to work, play, a walk, a sport, study, shopping. even cook up a nice meal- for yourself. change can work.

hopefully this post will too. maybe the foxy gal in the store will ask you what you,re doing with the nice bunch of spinach or whatever. also after seeing her today. if you're not feeling great- hope that it rides out quickly- and she obviously wasn,t sparked up either-any foxy or mellow chick/ gal/mate should hopefully be fun, supportive and rewarding. definitely not draining and grief inducing. run with things if they work. give it some effort, but change gears or directions if they don't. for what it might be worth. hope that's oK. : /

fk-

Comrade Shampanyov wrote: Who's Tim?

What's it to you? :p

On the BBC Office, the unrequited love interest :\ohwell:

I don't get the connection.

Comrade Shampanyov wrote: I don't get the connection.

My god, you're dense :p

Oh, wait, you were being sarcastic

perhaps he no watch tha office. we'll just refer to you as tim from now then ok.

I prefer Jim from the American version (actually, I prefer Pam from the American version, but I don't like being called by a woman's name...unless it's the safe word when the missus and I are playing "Bondage and Domination Theater" )

Taboo # 7 wrote:

Comrade Shampanyov wrote: I don't get the connection.

My god, you're dense :p

Oh, wait, you were being sarcastic

I don't get it.

Comrade Shampanyov wrote:

Taboo # 7 wrote:

Comrade Shampanyov wrote: I don't get the connection.

My god, you're dense :p

Oh, wait, you were being sarcastic

I don't get it.

there is this show called the office. one of the characters is to say the least awkward, and doesn't have much luck with the ladies. there.

Ronald Kirsch wrote:

Comrade Shampanyov wrote:

Taboo # 7 wrote:

Comrade Shampanyov wrote: I don't get the connection.

My god, you're dense :p

Oh, wait, you were being sarcastic

I don't get it.

there is this show called the office. one of the characters is to say the least awkward, and doesn't have much luck with the ladies. there.

I don't get it.

...3, 2, 1, and cue Trevor

:p

Comrade Shampanyov wrote: bLuE oR, er, Comrade must admit he's baffled. Is she putting out those vibes because she feeling lousy because she has some feelings for you too,

Hmm, never thought of that...I mean, the whole birthday card incident might've given her a hint. Plus, immediately after that is when her jerk of a boyfriend suddenly started hanging around more often, coming by when she is on break etc.

I'd love to hear what the ladies of NOOL think about this, btw.

You can all stop harassing me about this now...'cause I told her

Went by the store and stopped to talk to her a bit, stated that I felt like I'd been a jerk lately. She asked why, and I said that I'd had a huge crush on her since the day I'd started working there, and been too much of a coward to do anything about it. I also said it wasn't much fun for me to see her and the guy she's dating together, but as long as I got to be her friend it was good enough.

I then asked if I was still her friend (see "I was a jerk to her earlier this week"), and she said of course. I mentioned that I'd thought she might be mad at me, and she said she could "never be mad" at me

So I left it at that, and wished her a happy Valentine's day. That's all I wanted to do, and I did it.

I guess I'm becoming a man

So anyway, I can no longer play the role of "NOOL's resident miserable bastard" (that title can be passed on to you, Comrade S :p )

Signed,

NOOL's Resident Miserable Bastard

Now can we please focus on somebody else's love life?

nope....you are still fucked on principle. I got the whole...saying it straight thing sorted fucking years ago....gets you nowhere in the long run, other than a huge reduction in jerk-potential.

Then again....you're just inept...I'm ugly, rude, objectionable, arrogant...and inept :D

the boyfriend should be coming round any second now. don't open the door.

There's only two love lives on here, Tabbsy...Diggy's adventures in 38EEland, and Tabbsy's adventures in the sheep pen.

The rest of us are just sad, lonely, pathetic bastards, and I am their King.

So, to answer your question, no. :p

Steve Campbell wrote: nope....you are still fucked on principle. I got the whole...saying it straight thing sorted fucking years ago....gets you nowhere in the long run, other than a huge reduction in jerk-potential.

Then again....you're just inept...I'm ugly, rude, objectionable, arrogant...and inept :D

Well yeah, I know that already

But I'm no longer miserable about it. I proclaim this the "Summer of Trevor"...even though summer's a few months off

you don't want to be hearing about my life anyway. just one long sad story puntuated by the odd bright spot only to be bitterly dissapointed, and getting worse, just when this was supposed to have been my year.

snoop.

freedom. good fer speaking with her. her loss!

computers here, next Venice, then Manhattan... the sky's the limit. and try not to ever sell yourself short.

Steve Campbell wrote: nope....you are still fucked on principle. I got the whole...saying it straight thing sorted fucking years ago....gets you nowhere in the long run, other than a huge reduction in jerk-potential.

Then again....you're just inept...I'm ugly, rude, objectionable, arrogant...and inept

hairy, dragging yer knuckles along the gound, 7ft tall, no opposeable thumb...everybody's go to rack up their own notches.

no blueprint out there yet.

This is quite a nice soap opera going on here.

Trevor doesn't use soap. Probably explains a lot, when you think about it.

:p

Soap is fer them city folkes

Anyway, got a muy importante Spanish test to study for, if I can tear myself away from my own love-life thread long enough to do so. :p

Surely someone else has a more interesting love life than my own

Nope.

Well, Diggy, but he's *ahem* busy.

Taboo # 7 wrote: Anyway, got a muy importante Spanish test to study for

Any muy bonita senoritas to study with?

Comrade Shampanyov wrote:

Taboo # 7 wrote: Anyway, got a muy importante Spanish test to study for

Any muy bonita senoritas to study with?

Yo no tengo una muchacha bonita para estudiar espanol...

Then again, if I did I probably wouldn't be studying ........

Tabbsy you can't just learn from a book. It's very important to have study partners to practice with. Then, after anatomy, you and the senorita can see if you can learn any French. I mean Spanish...or whatever. Musta been distracted. :D