Friday night. — Forum Archive

3 Dec 2006, 10:24

Here is my experience of walking into town the other night. A group of three teenage girls appeared in the road. Girl 1: Excuse me, have you got a fag? Me: "No, sorry!" (Mentally prepare for laughter and verbal abuse. Walk faster). Voice from behind: “Where are you going? Wait!” Me: (Please don't beat me up) "Oh, just up town, late night shopping; to the shop." Voice from behind: "What for?" Me: "A music magazine. NME." Voice from behind: "Late night shopping finished at half eight. Its early night shopping." Me: "I'll go to Sainsbury's!" (Now being followed) Me: "I recognise you! And you! And you!" Girl 2: "We love you to bits. You're amazing. You're shit hot. You're funny. (They're going to stab me) Me: "Funny? Well, I'm not bothered about walking on my shoe heels." Girl 2: “Reece has a big willy. Do you know him?” Girl 3: “Yeah, Reece has a right big dick." (Girl 2 texts 'Reece with the big dick'. Look around for baseball bat wielding attacker) Me: "Does he have blonde hair?” Girl 2: “He has brown hair and a baseball cap. He lives across from the garage. Hangs around with Pip.” Me: (Play it safe) "I know him." Girls: "How old are you?” I tried to think, but couldn't remember. Me: "23. Or 24. I can't remember. I think I'm 24." All three (shouting): “Are you on something? You are, you're on something!” Girl 1: “Are you always hyper?” Me: "All the time! I've been drinking strong coffee all day and I've just had yoghurt and a scone with cherries in! It's the sugar! I'm sorry!" Girl 3: “She's on E's! What are you sorry for?” Me: "For tripping over your foot and thinking you were going to beat me up. For thinking that, because you're a group, you were going to beat me up. When I go out I just look straight ahead and don’t make eye contact." (Can they blame me?) Girl 3: “Oh, people do it all the time. Why would we beat you up? We're not like that. Look at the shoes we're wearing. As if I'd beat someone up wearing flip flops!” Girl 2: “We drank a litre of vodka. We've been to the Regal.” Me: "The Regal? I went there back in 1998!" Girl 2: “That was eight years ago!” Girl 3: “You're scared. We won't hurt you. The Elms Estate is shit. Strangers don't talk to us; they just look at us. We've never met anyone like you. You're a stranger, but you'll walk into town with us and have a laugh.” (Being hugged by Girl 3) Me: “Where are you going?” Girl 3: “Nowhere, just hanging around. Are you going to the shop?” (No. They'll eject us for being drunk and disorderly) Me: "I'm going back home now." (Turn around, girls follow) Me: “I want to hug you all. This is surreal. I'm just worried about you. There's these things called antisocial behaviour orders, and because you're loud and young, the coppers will take you home." Girl 2: “We smoke and have sex. We do everything! We're going to meet our boyfriends up town at the bar. I'm the Mayor's consort; I helped switch on the Christmas lights earlier. Where's the slide gone?" (Walk up lane. See man look out of window at racket) Girl 3: “Be normal!” Me: "Be normal. I like that." Girl 3: “If we're quiet, we won't get into trouble.” Me: “I look like you. They'll arrest me for being one of you." Girl 3: "We'll just say we're walking home. We'll leave you and we can all go our own ways.” (Now on Market Place) Me: “There's coppers over there.” Girl 2: ”I’m not being taken home in a police car. Mum will go mad.” Me: “I’m going to leave now, okay?” Girl 2: “If you see us around, say hello!” Me: "I will! And you’d better say hello to me!"