Spend a penny...

... MY ARSE!!!

What is it now with city centre bars? I've just got back from Dublin on a hen party which I expected to be expensive. I didn't expect to pay a Euro every time I went to the loo!

We spent all day in this one bar and from mid afternoon, some ladies had taken up residence offering all sorts of toiletries, lollipops, spearmint, hair bobbles, etc. Even if you choose not to use any of these, they force handwash on you when you wash your hands and then give you a towel to dry them. Each time you are expected to give money, and if it's less than a euro, it's frowned at.

One of these women actually said to me 'you leave a tip this time?', bloody cheek, she'd had 3 euros off me already.

Why do bars do this? It really gets on my nerves. I don't like to be bothered by assistants when I shop and I certainly don't when I'm visiting the lavvy! Do guys get this too? Before now I've only seen it in trendy clubs but now it seems even normal pubs in Bolton and Manchester are doing it too

Missy Jem wrote: Do guys get this too? Before now I've only seen it in trendy clubs but now it seems even normal pubs in Bolton and Manchester are doing it too

And I never leave them a tip...

stimulates the economy. stop griping.

(that said, i wouldn't tip them, and i wouldn't be in trendy places to begin with.)

Jem, you should always wash your hands after you've been for a piss.

You shouldn't need someone to tell you that.

I had a right row with a toilet attendant in a pub in the 'Deen a while back.

The floor was SWIMMING in piss and he's doing nothing about it. Then, as I was paddling back to the door (after washing my hands, Jem) he's got the nerve to remind me that I should leave some money in his dish. I should take some money OUT, I said to him. This place is full of piss. It's not my job to clean the floor, he said, just hand out towels.

Voices were raised, I tell thee

I always wash my hands young man. Although I don't know why I bother when some dirty bints storm straight out and you have to touch the door handle after them.

Missy Jem wrote: you have to touch the door handle after them.

That is one of my pet hates as well, I always take a paper towel out with me, or use the cuff of my sleeve,

nasty dirty things,toilet door handles

You shouldn't lick the door handles either.

There's a colourful , flamboyant chap in the bogs at a club here who repeats with great relish and enjoyment "FREEESHHHENNN UP!!!!! FREEEESHHHHHEN UP!!!!!!" ad infinitum.I often give him a tip for his entertainment value

Gazfella wrote:

nasty dirty things,toilet door handles

I collect them.

BIGINOIL wrote:

Gazfella wrote:

nasty dirty things,toilet door handles

I collect them.

Somehow,that doesnt surprise me..

I've got some swaps if you're interested...

BIGINOIL wrote: I've got some swaps if you're interested...

Only if theyve still got the pish stains on them..

:D

First bar I ever saw that in was that BARRACUDA bar next to Wetherspoons on Manchester Oxford Road.Actually its a Varsity pub now. But went up to toilets,went to sink,this black guy starts up the tap. Goes to plunge the soap,and he beats me to it.Goes to snatch a piece of paper towel,and produces one. Scared to go for a shit,in case this pair of hands in the porcelain throne caught it like a cricket ball.HOWZAT!

MONTY wrote: Scared to go for a shit,in case this pair of hands in the porcelain throne caught it like a cricket ball.HOWZAT!

Cricket ball shaped "jobbies" Monty

Thats frightenin mate!

Gazfella wrote:

Missy Jem wrote: you have to touch the door handle after them.

That is one of my pet hates as well, I always take a paper towel out with me, or use the cuff of my sleeve,

nasty dirty things,toilet door handles

Touch of the Howard Hughes developing there?

did the pub have a back alleyway.

do a squatie.problem solved at no cost.

Presumably you were in Temple Bar Jem - I hardly ever go drinking in there any more - its just a rip-off area for tourists (thats you!) - full of stags & hens the whole time too (you again!) although I shouldn't complain - the Centra there is probably my biggest customer.

BTW - you were in Dublin & didn't get in contact first - thats just wrong

:D

Just save yourself the aggro and piss in the corner...

Steve One wrote: Just save yourself the aggro and piss in the corner...

and just imagine if a copper came along Ste...

Gazfella wrote:

Steve One wrote: Just save yourself the aggro and piss in the corner...

and just imagine if a copper came along Ste...

I wouldn't do it personally, i might wee on my trainers but girls squat and Jem started the thread...