Congrats to Ravi!!!

carl jenkins wrote: she must have raped him. he doesn't even look old enough to have a dick

At what age does one usually attain a dick? I must be pretty well endowed, as I'm pretty sure my showed up at birth! :D

It's really a Rockabilly type of family. Presley had the song "Baby, Let's Play House" and Little Richard had the song "Baby Face".

Hurrah to them, by the age of 30 this cute little lad will manage to have a ball together with his son at clubs and colleges. Maybe together they'll attack women for some love

EdelBrock wrote:

HAL 9000 wrote: this is good stuff guys; keep the laughs coming

Yeah. So we're all here for yer freakin' amusement. Feck off ya big poof!

Ya know what, here's one better. Next time ya start laughing, I'll just shove me cock in yer yamming hole... how's that for ya!

thanks for the love; if you hold on a sec i might get some in my hand to share back with ya

Depends on whats in that hand yer extending...

What the fuck is this country coming to.

Word on the street is that he isn't the father at all, just a family friend of the mother - and both sets of their parents are now busily spending the money the 'story' has created.

Old Blue wrote: Word on the street is that he isn't the father at all, just a family friend of the mother - and both sets of their parents are now busily spending the money the 'story' has created.

Fair do's, I say - that's a happy ending if ever there was one. Anyone who has the savvy to make money out of the UK's casually reactionary fuckwittery (surely our most defining trait as a 'nation'?) is alright with me.

Did you just cast a vote for Jade Goody, M?

Ravi Kumar wrote: Dare say the actual father is a mature responsible 16 year old

Well, that's all right then.

Nothing to see here...

Diamond 383 wrote: Did you just cast a vote for Jade Goody, M?

Probably. People do all sorts of shitty things for money by choice. She's making a few quid while she can out of something she has no control over. Not hurting anyone else, is it?

I think people are more upset by the fact that she has the audacity to die in public than anything else. After all, how dare she?? It's not like that smug middle-class cunt who used to be married to Nigella Lawson is it. He wrote about it. With masses of "honesty" (read: self-pity). Jade can't write, therefore her slow, painful death is "vulgar".

I've not read the interviews.

It does all seem a little intrusive, and I don't feel that Goody will benefit financially makes it okay; in the same way that I don't think that the ongoing scrutiny of her whole adult life has been okay. Why can't a more worthy cancer sufferer profit from telling their life story? Why can't they all get help from the Sun? Why should she only be interested in helping her children? Why shouldn't all young orphans benefit from the media interest?

It's not her personally, it's the whole ridiculous system of false celebrity that I detest. I suppose this is awkward to think about because Goody's case is truly tragic.

EDIT: I've been thinking all day about Dina Rabinovitch, the journalist who described her own breast cancer in a beautiful and elegant way. I find it sad that hardly anyone will remember what she wrote, or even remember her name, if they ever did know of her.

Diamond 383 wrote:

It's not her personally, it's the whole ridiculous system of false celebrity that I detest. I suppose this is awkward to think about because Goody's case is truly tragic.

EDIT: I've been thinking all day about Dina Rabinovitch, the journalist who described her own breast cancer in a beautiful and elegant way. I find it sad that hardly anyone will remember what she wrote, or even remember her name, if they ever did know of her.

You can be sure Dina Rabinovitch will live on in the minds and memories of those that knew her,and loved her. It's the only place we can all be sure we live on..You can't buy that shit.

'Celebrity' is a bullshit concept within a death context I reckon..Cheap numbers,people know your name,so fuck?!

It's called love and it belongs to us,true as...

I'll get back to being a cynic and stop being philosophically gay,later.

And the Simon Adabisi headwear.

A)Too funny...Al,just tooo funny

B)Thanks for clearing that up Monty,but are you sure? He overacts the part of Kareem Saed intensely well.

c) What the fuck can I get into now? Oz is finished:(

Aw Boaty, you've gone all soft and caring.

Come on, let's hold hands and listen to Jetstream.

Diamond 383 wrote: Aw Boaty, you've gone all soft and caring.

Come on, let's hold hands and listen to Jetstream.

You would'nt let it lie,would ya!

I'll do anything for love,but I won't do that..

Ok,I'll just hold hands,sans Shitsream...How's that grab ya?

The stolen item of little or no monetary value is in the post!

The news has spread like syphilis here in the states. All the MSN contacts going on about it and such.

Jeffari-al-Texani wrote: http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/article2233878.ece

Baby-faced boy is father at 13

BOY dad Alfie Patten yesterday admitted he does not know how much nappies cost — but said: “I think it’s a lot.”

Baby-faced Alfie, who is 13 but looks more like eight, became a father four days ago when his girlfriend Chantelle Steadman gave birth to 7lb 3oz Maisie Roxanne.

He told how he and Chantelle, 15, decided against an abortion after discovering she was pregnant.

The shy lad, whose voice has not yet broken, said: “I thought it would be good to have a baby.

“I didn’t think about how we would afford it. I don’t really get pocket money. My dad sometimes gives me £10.”

Little family ... Alfie, Chantelle and baby Maisie

Alfie, who is just 4ft tall, added: “When my mum found out, I thought I was going to get in trouble. We wanted to have the baby but were worried how people would react.

“I didn’t know what it would be like to be a dad. I will be good, though, and care for it.”

Alfie’s dad Dennis told how the lad does not really understand the enormity of his situation — but seemed desperate to be a devoted and responsible father. Secret

He wanted to be the first to hold Maisie after the hospital birth. He tenderly kisses the baby and gives her a bottle.

And Dennis, 45, said: “He could have shrugged his shoulders and sat at home on his Playstation. But he has been at the hospital every day.”

Maisie was conceived after Chantelle and Alfie — just 12 at the time — had a single night of unprotected sex.

They found out about the baby when Chantelle was 12 weeks pregnant.

But they kept it a secret until six weeks later when Chantelle’s mum Penny, 38, became suspicious about her weight gain and confronted her.

Devoted ... Alfie holds and cuddles Maisie

After that Alfie’s family told only those closest to them for fear he would be “demonised” at school.

Chantelle gave birth to Maisie on Monday night after a five-hour labour at Eastbourne Hospital, East Sussex.

Last night she told The Sun: “I’m tired after the birth. I was nervous after going into labour but otherwise I was quite excited.”

Chantelle told how she discovered she was expecting after going to her GP with “really bad” stomach pains. She said: “Me and Alfie went. The doctor asked me whether we had sex. I said yes and he said I should do a pregnancy test. He did the test and said I was pregnant. I started crying and didn’t know what to do.

“He said I should tell my mum but I was too scared.

“We didn’t think we would need help from our parents. You don’t really think about that when you find out you are pregnant. You just think your parents will kill you.”

But Penny figured out what was going on after buying Chantelle a T-shirt which revealed her swelling tum.

Chantelle admitted she and Alfie — who are both being supported by their parents — would be accused of being grossly irresponsible. She said: “We know we made a mistake but I wouldn’t change it now. We will be good loving parents.

“I have started a church course and I am going to do work experience helping other young mums.

“I’ll be a great mum and Alfie will be a great dad.”

cont'd

truly sad and disturbing. see what happens when you play house & doctor.

poor kid!

Diamond 383 wrote: I've not read the interviews.

It does all seem a little intrusive, and I don't feel that Goody will benefit financially makes it okay; in the same way that I don't think that the ongoing scrutiny of her whole adult life has been okay. Why can't a more worthy cancer sufferer profit from telling their life story? Why can't they all get help from the Sun? Why should she only be interested in helping her children? Why shouldn't all young orphans benefit from the media interest?

It's not her personally, it's the whole ridiculous system of false celebrity that I detest. I suppose this is awkward to think about because Goody's case is truly tragic.

EDIT: I've been thinking all day about Dina Rabinovitch, the journalist who described her own breast cancer in a beautiful and elegant way. I find it sad that hardly anyone will remember what she wrote, or even remember her name, if they ever did know of her.

She's 27, got two kids and going to be six feet under in a few months; I'd say that both her earnings and celebrity culture are both rendered pretty trivial by comparison.

I don't see why the death of someone who had an infinitely more privileged upbringing than Jade Goody is any more tragic regardless of how "beautiful and elegant" their writing.* Quite the opposite, in fact.

Cancer is a fucker. And a very democratic fucker at that.

I was commenting on the coverage and other people's perceptions, or those seemingly forced upon us by the media, not the relative merits of the tragedies themselves.

It's a stupid thing to try to speak about anyway - sorry.

BillONdollar wrote:

poor kid!

baby faced my arse. I'd check the little cunt's head for three sixes, shrewd little twat though, getting the paternity test after the meeja fuss and paychecks have died down.

Diamond 383 wrote: The stolen item of little or no monetary value is in the post!

Such a tease! Should be here in the morning then.I await with trepidation...

Probably bloody anthrax or summat,eh?

Though anthrax must be worth a few sheckles,tight git!

It's worth fuck all, mate.

It is literally in the post though - just back from the post office now.