weapons of mass destruction

try this

click here(google.com) type weapons of mass destruction but do not search - click on "i'm feeling lucky"

Aah... Oil, Black Gold. Obvious or what? Or just plain sad?

did you actually click on the links provided in the warning message? i always wanted a copy of "doctor strangelove"

'the existential poetry of donald rumsfeld.'

brilliant!

also type in: french military victories and then click on the top link.

man, that's a bit stupid....and funny as hell!

Brilliant Ricardo!

Originally posted by Ricardo I couldn't resist posting this...The Complete Military History of France

• Gallic Wars

• Lost. In a war whose ending foreshadows the next 2000 years of French history, France is conquered by of all things, an Italian.

• Hundred Years War

• Mostly lost, saved at last by female schizophrenic who inadvertently creates The First Rule of French Warfare; "France's armies are victorious only when not led by a Frenchman." Sainted.

• Italian Wars

• Lost. France becomes the first and only country to ever lose two wars when fighting Italians.

• Wars of Religion

• France goes 0-5-4 against the Huguenots

• Thirty Years War

• France is technically not a participant, but manages to get invaded anyway. Claims a tie on the basis that eventually the other participants started ignoring her.

• War of Revolution

• Tied. Frenchmen take to wearing red flowerpots as chapeaux.

• The Dutch War

• Tied

• War of the Augsburg League/King William's War/French and Indian War

• Lost, but claimed as a tie. Three ties in a row induces deluded Frogophiles the world over to label the period as the height of French military power.

• War of the Spanish Succession

• Lost. The War also gave the French their first taste of a Marlborough, which they have loved every since.

• American Revolution

• In a move that will become quite familiar to future Americans, France claims a win even though the English colonists saw far more action. This is later known as "de Gaulle Syndrome", and leads to the Second Rule of French Warfare; "France only wins when America does most of the fighting."

• French Revolution

• Won, primarily due the fact that the opponent was also French.

• The Napoleonic Wars

• Lost. Temporary victories (remember the First Rule!) due to leadership of a Corsican, who ended up being no match for a British footwear designer.

• The Franco-Prussian War

• Lost. Germany first plays the role of drunk Frat boy to France's ugly girl home alone on a Saturday night.

• World War I

• Tied and on the way to losing, France is saved by the United States. Thousands of French women find out what it's like to not only sleep with a winner, but one who doesn't call her "Fraulein." Sadly, widespread use of condoms by American forces forestalls any improvement in the French bloodline.

• World War II

• Lost. Conquered French liberated by the United States and Britain just as they finish learning the Horst Wessel Song.

• War in Indochina

• Lost. French forces plead sickness; take to bed with the Dien Bien Flu

• Algerian Rebellion

• Lost. Loss marks the first defeat of a western army by a Non-Turkic Muslim force since the Crusades, and produces the First Rule of Muslim Warfare; "We can always beat the French." This rule is identical to the First Rules of the Italians, Russians, Germans, English, Dutch, Spanish, Vietnamese and Esquimaux.

• War on Terrorism

• France, keeping in mind its recent history, surrenders to Germans and Muslims just to be safe. Attempts to surrender to Vietnamese ambassador fail after he takes refuge in a McDonald's.

The question for any country silly enough to count on the French should not be "Can we count on the French?", but rather "How long until France collapses?"

"Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without an accordion. All you do is leave behind a lot of noisy baggage."

Or, better still, the quote from last week's Wall Street Journal: "They're there when they need you."

quite a bit of what you say is true, but the things where you say tie, the French won, plus you don't include a lot of details with the religious wars against the germans in which we won; hmmm no mentioning of Charlemagne, and to top it all off this isn't even ur own work http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/jokes/bljokefrenchmilitaryhistory.htm you really should give credit where it's due.... j/k I'm not pissed off. Well I'd rather be French than Brazilian :) well actually I'm American

Originally posted by Ricardo Sorry for not giving the credits, but I just didn't know who the author was. It's something I've found in the Internet some time ago and I decided to post it here after reading about the "French military victories".Brazilians are not into war. Well, unless you count the undeclared civil war we have in the biggest cities of the country.

it's what comes up in the link to click on if you type in french military victories, in my post above. it takes you to the page tristan notes.

no matter what, it is still funny. though, i don't think it is as funny as the america's-view-of-the-world map posted in "that other" thread.

Originally posted by Sean Taugher no matter what, it is still funny. though, i don't think it is as funny as the america's-view-of-the-world map posted in "that other" thread.

Sean, perhaps I missed out on a thread triumphantly announcing your entrance to the forum (as I usually avoid those 'hi, i'm new here and lonely, will you all be my internet buddies?' threads, except to attack whoever started them). Or perhaps you didn't have a thread (I didn't). So now that you seem to be one of the loyalists on the forum, I'd like to say hello and welcome. I do this because you remind me of myself a few months back, just starting in like you own the place and trying to cause some minor trouble every now and then. Oh, I'm getting misty just thinking about the good old days. Kudos to you.

Originally posted by Sean Taugher no matter what, it is still funny. though, i don't think it is as funny as the america's-view-of-the-world map posted in "that other" thread.

I think the Carls Jr commercial for their chicken sandwhich is hilarious; the one making fun of the french

Originally posted by His Holiness, The Pope > Originally posted by Sean Taugher> no matter what, it is still funny. though, i don't think it is as funny as the america's-view-of-the-world map posted in "that other" thread.

Sean, perhaps I missed out on a thread triumphantly announcing your entrance to the forum (as I usually avoid those 'hi, i'm new here and lonely, will you all be my internet buddies?' threads, except to attack whoever started them). Or perhaps you didn't have a thread (I didn't). So now that you seem to be one of the loyalists on the forum, I'd like to say hello and welcome. I do this because you remind me of myself a few months back, just starting in like you own the place and trying to cause some minor trouble every now and then. Oh, I'm getting misty just thinking about the good old days. Kudos to you.

thanks, your most holy-holy...

yeah, i hate those "hi, my name is blabla, and i am new. the only reason i am telling you i am new, is because i can't think of anything else to say except i love new order and barney is really cute. you could probably figure ou that i am new, seeing as how there is only a "1" after the text "number of posts:" but like i said, i am new and want to introduce myself so you know i am new blablablablablabla blablablablablabla blablablablablabla blablablablablabla blablablablablabla blablablablablabla blablablablablabla blablablablablabla blablablablablabla blablablablablabla blablablablablabla blablablablablabla blablablablablabla blablablablablabla " type posts, too. :barf: so i didn't do one; you are right about that.

hey, so now that this post is kinda dead i am going to be real dastardly, and change the topic. since you live near the northern boarder, do you know anything about smuggling rock bands into canada mr. pope? i am trying to find a way in...

Originally posted by Sean Taugher hey, so now that this post is kinda dead i am going to be real dastardly, and change the topic. since you live near the northern boarder, do you know anything about smuggling rock bands into canada mr. pope? i am trying to find a way in...

Very ironic that you asked me that, as just yesterday I happened to read in the latest copy of The Stranger, Seattle's premier alternative newspaper, an article by some chick from a rock band about how emigrate to Canada and why you shouldn't get a work permit to cross the border if you're in a band, etc. Luckily, The Stranger has a website, so here is the link to that article, part of a feature about why Canada is better than the U.S., http://www.thestranger.com/current/ex9.html
As a slightly-underage student attending college not more than half an hour from the border, I have to say that crossing over isn't that hard at all. It is certainly harder now than it was several years ago, but all you need is a passport or original birth certificate, plus a driver's license. Then just tell them something about going up to eat dinner (which we do occasionally to go to a wonderful all-you-can-eat sushi place in Richmond), or going sightseeing if it's during the day, or whatever. However, before reading that article, I had no idea that they scan cars within a kilometer of the border to listen in if people are trying to make up stories as they go. I know we've done that before, but they've never stopped us. However, a good excuse for a van full of equipment may require a bit more creativity, but shouldn't be a stretch. Hope I've been of some help, sir.

you've been most helpful!!!

we have a show in vancouver, and to get there is presenting itself with a bit of a problem. then again, if we can't nail down shows in seattle & portland, there is no real reason to drive all the way up there.