The Gig Goers Guide to NEWORDER

I have lately been pondering how NEXT time i go and see NEW ORDER how to alleviate the recent problems i have encountered at such gigs.Now i am not just talking about how to avoid SHUGZV when i am getting a round in.I mean i used to go to concerts and festivals without any problems.But recently i have either fallen down outside a KFC sans chicken with the BARGAIN BUCKET on my head or missed my last train home and had to book into a hotel where SHUGZV was touting for buisness in the foyer at 01:00am which can be very TRAUMATIC.Even people that have come into close proximity of me eg JEFF THE AMERICAN has managed to lose ALL his wordly goods whilst getting over excited before seeing NEW ORDER.So now this is posted on the SILLY can we have a PROPER guide...make it simple just in case DIGITAL MIKE joins in,what i am after is a genuine layout of how to survive the gig from buying my ticket to getting home after the event with a proper T-SHIRT(that fits) from the concert.I am sure that some of you here have a better grasp of NEW ORDER concerts than me.To help things we should limit the number of beers that are drunk before said gig.So what shall we do?I do know i will have to get a NEW passport just in case they play somewhere local in EUROPE.Going further afield for me will not be a REALITY due to lack of funds/work.So any help will be taken on board. Regards Rocket Mick

Mick - you can drop that "sobriety" nonsense for a start. Here's to the next gig's bout of broken limbs and fast-food fuck-ups!!

Originally posted by Doctor Clayhead Mick - you can drop that "sobriety" nonsense for a start. Here's to the next gig's bout of broken limbs and fast-food fuck-ups!!

Er.......very helpful!Well lets just say IN MODERATION(and cut out any DRUGS.)

It's dead simple really Mick.

1. Get Ready - buy ticket, sort out accommodation, either blagging a floor or booking a hotel

2. Movement - travel to venue town, then from house/hotel to pub near venue

3. Brotherhood and Power, Corruption and Lies - meet up with NOOL posse for beer and banter, scans of David Sultan's collection (which he had brought with him in Paris!), Stash's setlist sweep (got a bit boring in 2002 when we knew who had won before they even came on stage)

4. Technique - drink as much beer as possible without falling over and losing plot. To be fair mate, you may need to work on this one a bit :)

5. Low Life - pick self up off floor and head for gig, get down front and have a fookin' good time

6. Substance - if anyone's holding

7. Retro - do it all again next time!

8. International - in the event of gigs away from the UK, remember passport and foreign currency. Europe have got something called the Euro now, gets you more beer.

Originally posted by ShugZV© You've been sniffing the Jif again....haven't youGET BACK to cleaning that bathroom ya big woos. Moderation? Que? Nothing done properly is done in moderation, think about that for a minute, while it seems a throw away statement I genuinely believe it to be true You HAVE heard some of the live concerts haven't you? They don't sound like that when the rain's pishing down on ye and yer being stamped on by several members of the Dinasour Jnr fanclub....BUT......yer far too drunk to care. ALTERNATIVELY yer singing every word whilst doing a John the POSTMAN pogo while being growled at by the HookmEister. Tickets should always be obtained from an Uncle, but with you being 63 I am doubting there's an ALBERT left. Pubs should be entered the day before a concert, preperation essential here. Plus begging messages on websites at least a month before gig is essential so you have somewhere to stay overnight, car parks and train stations (espescially in LONDON) to be avoided at ALL costs. Nightclubs after gigs is not normally a good idea, particularly when you are with tall gay pepople and BANK managers. If easily EMBARRASSED neworder is not for you. HAVING said all that, all this talk has the senses going for a lager shandy in March. CU all there if BALDRICK is available to drive me about

I'll second that about London stations: I've lost count of the amount of times over the years that I've ended up locked outside of Euston in the freezing cold with only the dregs of humanity to keep me company until 5am.....

Originally posted by oldmonkey It's dead simple really Mick.1) Get Ready - buy ticket, sort out accommodation, either blagging a floor or booking a hotel2) Movement - travel to venue town, then from house/hotel to pub near venue3) Brotherhood and Power, Corruption and Lies - meet up with NOOL posse for beer and banter, scans of David Sultan's collection (which he had brought with him in Paris!), Stash's setlist sweep (got a bit boring in 2002 when we knew who had won before they even came on stage)4) Technique - drink as much beer as possible without falling over and losing plot. To be fair mate, you may need to work on this one a bit :)5) Low Life - pick self up off floor and head for gig, get down front and have a fookin' good time6) Substance - if anyone's holding7) Retro - do it all again next time!8) International - in the event of gigs away from the UK, remember passport and foreign currency. Europe have got something called the Euro now, gets you more beer.

Excellent POST....yeah it looks like i have a bit of work to do.Now where did i put my DOCs?

Rocket

You will be able to spot me, i will be the one wearing the BRAZILIAN POSTMAN T-shirt.

Oh and make it simple for DIGITAL MIKE, well I have never been so insulted, well not until the next Rocket Mick post.

Euston 5am and the mail train, thanks for reminding me

Why isn't this thread in the Digital Republic?

Who can tell?

Good to see. It's always important that new players get the wisdom of the more experienced members on how to make the best of a live New Order experience. My bit of advice is no more than 10 Scotch & Cokes before the event. You can get pissed anytime, but when will you next see the Order.

Why ever get pissed before a concert? Stoned, maybe. Caffeinated out of my head, definately.

The getting drunk is for afterwards. In my case, usually when I'm within staggering distance of home, e.g. my local

If the nearest NO gig is in Mancland, it'll have to be just after the gig though, not waiting till I get back to Caulfields to get pissed...

Never seen them sober it's the getting there, being there and getting home that's important. Old Monkeys' guide was about as good as it gets, just need the bastards to play all the rest will fall into place.

I'm willing to do Ireland and Mancland, and after June, anywhere else I can afford to. Except Bratislava unless someone guarantees me that its not as much a kip as it was in 2003....

Getting places in stupid timeframes is my speciality. Had to get to Cardiff, watch a match and get back to Dublin in time for a Physics exam. Made the exam in plenty of time, just decided not to go in

Not prepared to see NO on Irish soil again due to the fucking crazy standing segragation at Red Hot CPs. fuck them.

But anywhere else........... well........

Rocket, come to think of it, you look a little bit like Colonel Saunders..........

:bag:

International - in the event of gigs away from the UK, remember passport and foreign currency. Europe have got something called the Euro now, gets you more beer.

And in germany remember - Mullet hairstyle(although this seems to be making a worrying comeback in this country) and a crappy moustache (ala bernard in his JD years) so you blend in with the locals.

Your lighter to join in with everyone who thinks they are at a fecking whitesnake gig during the slow songs.

Other than that the cologne gig was bloody good fun and the beer cheap!

Southen Fried Chicken and Chips please Rocket

Well i now feel very confidant that i shall last a MINI-TOUR of NEW ORDER where BLUE MONDAY will be requested for our NOOL'er,DIGITAL MIKE.Then it will be MURDER!

Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh