Where does one begin?
Friday - Got to Rocket Mikos' humble abode about 2.30, pulled up in the Baldrick Mobile to a sight of purple doc martin's on the Rocket's windysill
Just what kind of mad place was this?
Straight in to the house to be greeted by Mikos (or as Darren now refers to him....Slaphead
) records, cd's, posters, magazines scattered everyfookinwhere - a right wee Aladdin's cave, some absolute classics in his collection - honestly, just too many to mention - but the live records he has were the pick of the bunch fer moi
After 30 minutes or so, we were joined by Mr Hanky Panky (who had just cycled 25 miles, just to see the famous collection
Mad Bastard ) after the viewing and a few cans of Stella - we decided to go to Mick's local..."The Blob Shop" I kid you not! what a name fer a pub! full of absolute nutcases:D
We walked through the doors of his local, to the immortal lines....."See them 2 birds over there, they're lesbians.......and they both fancy me!" 
We were further introduced to a couple of Mick's pals, who, for some reason all had the same nickname.....Mad Billy, Mad Phil, Mad Steve.....you see what I mean
After a coople of Shandy's, poor ole Ian had to bike to the station following The Baldrick Mobile, poor bastard was peddling away, trying to keep up, when Baldrick decides to complete a lap of the roundabout Which left Hanky in a bit of a spin
Anyways, we said cheerio to Ian, and somehow talked The Rocket man into coming to Liv's with us Got to Liv's about 7, where we also met Annie, Liv's pal Peter, Majorboy and Paul....everyone got ready and headed into town.....or should I say CANAL STREET.....for those of you who don't know, this is the gay area of Manchester (all Liv's idea I've gotta say )
It was a very pleasant evening except fer 2 minor points...Number 1, with all us blokes never being to a gay area before, we all felt obliged to take a mate to the bog with us which probably looked even worse Number 2...on leaving Canal Street, Shug was called something which he took exception to ( I don't want to mention the words, in case I offend any of my Gay followers;) ) anyways, most of the group were miles ahead, which left myself and Paul talking footy, the words were shouted again, which incensed moi, so I shouted something like "Who the fuck are you talking to?"
Next thing you know, there were 7 or 8 of his mates behind him I thought it was gonna be a Casualty follow on from Finsbree.....are you reading Rocket Mick?
Thankfully my new bodyguard grabbed me round the neck and escorted me away from the drunken mob, and straight into the club where everyone else was!
Can't remember the name of the place - Liv will probably fill ye's in (no pun intended;) ) The club was divided into 2 rooms, one fer Indie and one fer rave music, we all went to the indie side, where we were a bit perplexed to hear NUFUCKINGMETAL all night .....well except fer The Strokes and The Hives, good night had by all, and it was worth it alone to see The Rocket Fella pole dancing
Here's where the fun starts:D
Decided to catch The Nightbus to Cairo.....sorry, Nightbus to Sale home, everyone piled upstairs, to where everyone was in good spirits, a few mouthy birds at the front, and the back of the bus So Rocket Man decides to start interracting with them This is where he called one of the larger ladies Jade from Big Brother and the next thing you know, he's blamed it on one of the girls at the back of the bus All fuckin hell broke loose - much to the Onliner's joy......sorry amazement
2 birds going at it like there was no tomorrow - Paul had one bird all over him, while she was trying to get at another bird - knickers showing....the lot All the girls mates tried to calm things down - but for one of the mouthy (and seriously pissed) girls, she couldn't let it lay.....we were treated to "I've got a knife in me knickers....yer gonna get stabbed" and various other foul mouthed comments, funny as fuck it was for everyone....well apart from Baldrick, as he was sat next to a bird, and right near the bitch from hell
Morale of this story? Keep THE ROCKET away from drunk girls and public transport
Got back to Liv's about 4 - continued talking and laughing about the BUS incident till 7, I think that's when we crashed out. Up at 10 due to Rocket's booming voice....I say, BOOMING VOICE:D
Got to Dukes 92 around 2ish?? and sat upstairs in "The Gallery" very nice it was - Budvar (my dance partner from after the gig) was the first to meet us there - then El Jarvo, Paula and Johnny Giles, went outside fer a bit, where we also met up with Johan who was filming, as well as Jim Reilly, Martin Fradley, Marty, Kezzie and co, and a couple ofothers from WIM. Fookin lovely day - everyone out in t-shirts, Uncly John and Lorraine also joined proceedings before we headed off to see The Doves and New Order.
We got right down the front as usual for the start of The Doves set, fuckin good they were Major was well happy - and when their singer mentioned "The guy down the front has got the biggest tits I've ever seen" everyone pointed at the Wonderboy
Tony Wilson came on before Alan Wise to say a few words, which was funny as fuck - cos I happily started off the booing and hissing in our wee area No offence Tony;)
Then New Order kicked off with LOVE VIGILANTIES (as you all know by now) fuckin pandemonium - the place went banana's, and we were all thinking "Well maybe they're gonna surprise us".....it lasted all of 5 minutes till Crystal started
To be perfectly truthful I was a bit pissed so my recollections are somewhat hazy Do remeber it being fanfookintastic....except fer WIM To which my Uncle John held up the Double finger and single finger to Barney throughout the song (a wee reference to The Brazil game ) met up with the rest of the onliners at the end, hoping to obtain party tickets fer the aftershow - which never happened Spent a while in the hope of a ticket outside the show's entrance - watched Hooky arrive, and my pal Bez fall into a wee tree Headed home fer more beer.
Sunday was spent recovering after only 2 hours kip - then we headed off to The Piccadilly tavern fer a beer, met up with Jim Reilly who was gonna be playing Bass - went fer the soundcheck, and also hooked up with Marty (drums and keyboards) and Timbo (Geetar)
After a slow start, there were quite a few in the club - myself and Annie decided to do a Eurovision Song Contest type voting scheme to all the bands who played - but after sobering up, I have decided no to embarrass the bands who were bad (they know who they are )
Marty, Jimbo and Tim performed an excellent version of Truth (except fer Tim missing the keybaord intro.....which led to Jimbo pointing at the keybaords ) fantastic version it was, speeded right up after the verses, Marty battering seven shades of shite out of his drums, and Tim and Jimbo doing their best geetar heroes bit:DJim you've gotta sort out a New Order tribute band with the others;) )
Then it was Tim's time to do a solo - I think the less said of this.....the better Sorry mate;)
Fatt Shaft done a superb Touched By The Hand Of God, as did Gobberzmimes with New Dawn Fades
Probably being a wee bit biased here, but best song of the night went to the onliner's version of The Perfect Kiss - I think it's safe to say that Liv was shiting it - but after the first verse she began to enjoy it and paraded around the stage with Mr Reilly doing the Barney side step Jim sang the next verse and they both done the wee bit at the end, special mention on this one has to go to The Marty What a performer - keyboardtastic my ole compadre - he not only done the sequencing - but also put in extra loud sound effects for the instumental bit of the song! Major was also involved in the group, doing his Barney impersonator bit with his Cowbell bashing! Tim played Bass on this one - which was superb, and they were joined by a guy from one of the other groups on guitar (sorry I've forgotten his name! but he was fantastic an all - he also did an accoustic version of Run on his own)
Mentalist performed a great version of True Faith Except fer the PA fucking up after the first verse (a la Manchester 98 ) Headz Jellmo hit us with a rap type version of Heart & Soul (sorry my descriptions are poor;) ) and then we had Tribeca finishing things off with Dream Attack (minus their lead singer) which was a great way to finish up. All in all a succesful night - fair play to Marty and "Elbows" Alex and evryone else who helped organise it - I'm terrible fer remembering names, hopefully the next one will go smoother - and ALL the musicians will turn up
Overall a fucking fantastic weekend - apparently they're going to record a new album
:D
Let's fookin hope so - and in the meantime.....where are we gonna hold the next weekender?;)
God Bless The Order....ShugZV
