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Wenger/Brighton/Mancini

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i) Dear Brighton contingent (yes, all two of you): I read that our man Arismendi has grown tired of fucking everything that moves in the North Staffs district and is now joining your big bunch of south coast poofters until the end of the season. He is, apparently, a serious talent with a major attitude problem - which is why Our Tone doesn't trust him. Hope he does well for you. His all-night parties are legendary.

ii) Arsene "I don't believe in coincidence" Wenger. It is both entertaining and depressing how a man long respected as one of the most intelligent and thoughtful people working in the English game has now lapsed into a mire of paranoiac delusion and an all-consuming persecution complex. Mark my words: before long he'll be incoherently blaming "the Jews" for Arsenal's failure to win anything.

iii) Mr Mancini: fuck off, you vacuous scarf-wearing cock.

That is all.

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I like Brighton,, and yes the parties are lege,,cant see mr wenger on the beach till 3 a.m blowing his whistle urging mancini to take off his scarf and loosen up a little, like stuff existentialism, lets paaaarttttee.

can i rename this the B.M.W Thread.

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Clayhead Liberation Faction wrote: i) Dear Brighton contingent (yes, all two of you): I read that our man Arismendi has grown tired of fucking everything that moves in the North Staffs district and is now joining your big bunch of south coast poofters until the end of the season. He is, apparently, a serious talent with a major attitude problem - which is why Our Tone doesn't trust him. Hope he does well for you. His all-night parties are legendary.

ii) Arsene "I don't believe in coincidence" Wenger. It is both entertaining and depressing how a man long respected as one of the most intelligent and thoughtful people working in the English game has now lapsed into a mire of paranoiac delusion and an all-consuming persecution complex. Mark my words: before long he'll be incoherently blaming "the Jews" for Arsenal's failure to win anything.

iii) Mr Mancini: fuck off, you vacuous scarf-wearing cock.

That is all.

Post of the Year!

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Clayhead Liberation Faction wrote:

i) Dear Brighton contingent (yes, all two of you): I read that our man Arismendi has grown tired of fucking everything that moves in the North Staffs district and is now joining your big bunch of south coast poofters until the end of the season. He is, apparently, a serious talent with a major attitude problem - which is why Our Tone doesn't trust him. Hope he does well for you. His all-night parties are legendary.

'Tis true. Apparently Sir Gus Of Poyet was fed up not having anyone else Uruguayan to talk to. (although our official site just says it was a 'sensational move' getting him to sign.)

Is he any good, then? Surprised we can afford his wages!

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Old Blue wrote:

Clayhead Liberation Faction wrote:

i) Dear Brighton contingent (yes, all two of you): I read that our man Arismendi has grown tired of fucking everything that moves in the North Staffs district and is now joining your big bunch of south coast poofters until the end of the season. He is, apparently, a serious talent with a major attitude problem - which is why Our Tone doesn't trust him. Hope he does well for you. His all-night parties are legendary.

'Tis true. Apparently Sir Gus Of Poyet was fed up not having anyone else Uruguayan to talk to. (although our official site just says it was a 'sensational move' getting him to sign.)

Is he any good, then? Surprised we can afford his wages!

According to the lunatic fringe who go and watch Stoke reserves play on a regular basis he's supposed to be amazing. The thinking in the Potteries is that it's only the 'Poyet factor' that has made the move happen: according to the hype when we bought him he's 100% Grade-A natural talent.

Again, however, he clearly doesn't work 'aaaard enough for our Gaffer and so he's rarely figured amongst our first-team of career-destroying, anti-football, leg-breaking, long-throwing neanderthal arseholes. Which is a shame. He has currently been making the news in Stoke because of his taste for snorting white powders off the breasts of nubile young women from Tunstall at 4am. Allegedly. We're probably still paying 90% of his wages just to get him and his wayward lifestyle out of the Potteries....

Given all of the above, he'll probably get sent off in his first game for you and the get done for statutory rape during his 3-match ban. Then again, he might redeem himself and save you from relegation. Who knows.....

:crazy:

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Clayhead Liberation Faction wrote:

According to the lunatic fringe who go and watch Stoke reserves play on a regular basis he's supposed to be amazing. The thinking in the Potteries is that it's only the 'Poyet factor' that has made the move happen: according to the hype when we bought him he's 100% Grade-A natural talent.

Again, however, he clearly doesn't work 'aaaard enough for our Gaffer and so he's rarely figured amongst our first-team of career-destroying, anti-football, leg-breaking, long-throwing neanderthal arseholes. Which is a shame. He has currently been making the news in Stoke because of his taste for snorting white powders off the breasts of nubile young women from Tunstall at 4am. Allegedly. We're probably still paying 90% of his wages just to get him and his wayward lifestyle out of the Potteries....

Given all of the above, he'll probably get sent off in his first game for you and the get done for statutory rape during his 3-match ban. Then again, he might redeem himself and save you from relegation. Who knows.....

:crazy:

No. THAT was the post of the year.

:lol:

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I'm looking for Tunstall?Directions please....

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Clayhead Liberation Faction wrote:

Given all of the above, he'll probably get sent off in his first game for you and the get done for statutory rape during his 3-match ban. Then again, he might redeem himself and save you from relegation. Who knows.....

:crazy:

Oi! We've won TWO in a row - the play-off push starts now. :laugh:

There is currently a ten-page knickerwetathon on North Stand Chat salivating at the prospect of his arrival...

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SHED wrote: I'm looking for Tunstall?Directions please....

Mick, don't be fooled. There are no nubile young ladies in Tunstall, believe me.

Fradders would be there if there were any.

:nod:

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SHED wrote: I'm looking for Tunstall?Directions please....

Turn right at Cleavage and follow the signs to Muff Valley :thumb:

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Boing Boing wrote:

SHED wrote: I'm looking for Tunstall?Directions please....

Turn right at Cleavage and follow the signs to Muff Valley :thumb:

thanks:lol:

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RoCkeT MIck wrote:

Boing Boing wrote:

SHED wrote: I'm looking for Tunstall?Directions please....

Turn right at Cleavage and follow the signs to Muff Valley :thumb:

thanks:lol:

Don't worry, Mick - like the song says, you're only "24 Hours from Tunstall".

(Though you can pick up a hooker in Cobridge for a fiver.)

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