Skip to content

Do bees have knees?

Archived

22 replies · 470 views

This is an archived legacy thread. Replies are closed, but the discussion is preserved.

:scratch:

I asked Brian he had been wondering himself for a long time and he likes to ask lots of questions, but clever ones, not nosey ones. Questions like where can we go to see yellow snow? Can pigs fly if they really try? And what is a walrus and why?

But there is one big thing he really wants to know.

He knows that they are yellow and black, have wings and stings, and live in hives where they keep their honey.

But can you tell him, please - do bees have knees ?

Please don't rush out into your garden to find a bee to search for his knees. It's probably dark out there, and you'll only usually see bees where there are sun and flowers.

But in Brian's garden just now, there is sun and plenty of flowers ...

… but are there any bees ?

Let's see !

Just outside the back door, there's a mole poking out of a hole. But he's too busy thinking of his lunch (a lovely cheese roll) to hear Brian ask about bees and their whereabouts.

Perhaps that fox striding up the path can help. Too late! He's jumped over the wall, on his way to the shops. And anyway his mind is definitely on birds, not bees.

What about those two rhinos, paddling in the pond ? "Have you seen any bees ?" Brian asks them. "I want to see if they have knees"

"No, we haven't" they say. "We're not allowed near the flowers, because we get the hay fever. Our noses are running enough already."

Best leave them to make busy with their handkerchiefs.

What about asking something that lives in the sky whether they have seen any bees flying by ?

But these five baby birds won't help. They are too busy fighting over who gets to sleep in the vest that their mum brought back with the last lot of worms.

Brian, how about finding some other insects ? They might have a better idea than animals and birds about what bees get up to and where they might be hiding.

Over there, on the patio. Ants. We can ask them.

Oh, how embarrassing ! Look away. They're only wearing underpants.

Ants in their pants ?!

Suddenly loud music appears from nowhere. Now that's why they were on the patio - the ants have come to dance.

Their ant moves are good to watch, but they can't hear Brian over the noise.

"Do you know where I can find some bees ?" he shouts. But all he hears back is the "boom boom chaka boom" of the ant music.

It's very nice to know that these things are in Brian's garden. But, oh dear, they are not really what we're looking for.

We're looking for little insects. The ones with black and yellow stripes. With stings and wings. But they are not wasps.

Where are the bees ?

But over the wall - what's that coming ?

Lots of buzzes and plenty of humming !

As quick as he can, Brian climbs up to the top of the wall.

He sees lots of bees ! And they're playing football.

Of course, they're wearing shorts, so it's easy to tell - bees do have knees, and elbows as well !

So bees have knees. That was worth finding out.

But do ants really wear pants ? No chance !

0 likes

:confused::confused::confused::confused::confused: Is this a football thing?

0 likes

ants do wear pants

0 likes

And what pants! :clap::clap::clap::clap:

0 likes

they have 6 knees?

0 likes

Originally posted by His Holiness, The Pope they have 6 knees?

they can't have six knees, cause they have elbows as well

0 likes

What about Eric the Half a Bee ?

0 likes

never mind that

do dogs have bollocks, cats have whiskers & just how tight is a gnat's chuff?

0 likes

in psi units.

0 likes

No time I'm tryin different tunes for your avatar to dance to, Roni size / Reprazent next

0 likes

That is one seriously fucked up avatar.:laugh:

0 likes

Originally posted by Mr Hibster gnat's chuff?

depends on the gnat and the humidity of the air

0 likes

bees have bouncers that break other bees knees when they try and get back into the hive intoxicated :)

:jump:

0 likes

Originally posted by Mr Hibster never mind that do dogs have bollocks, cats have whiskers & just how tight is a gnat's chuff?

your avatar is so hilarious...

0 likes

Originally posted by Mr Hibster never mind that do dogs have bollocks, cats have whiskers & just how tight is a gnat's chuff?

your avatar is so hilarious...

0 likes

Yes, but did Jesus have knees? The controversay around Mel Gibson's "The Passion" ignores this question, but it is of fundamental importence to Jerry Falwell in his grudge match against Pat Robertson :nuts:

0 likes

Originally posted by Taboo # 7 Yes, but did Jesus have knees? The controversay around Mel Gibson's "The Passion" ignores this question, but it is of fundamental importence to Jerry Falwell in his grudge match against Pat Robertson :nuts:

Hey I watch TBN not for those two pricks; I watch it for the lady with the pink hair :love2:

0 likes

Dude, I love the lady with the pink wig! I also love how God-awful (no pun intended) those sets are (the "fake-fancy" set-up). Good for some laughs

You have to see Jack Van Impe on Friday nights, he and some dumb blonde do a show on that station (at least it's carried on the same station in my neck of the woods) where she is the Amazing Headline Reading Machine, and he has a Bible verse for everything and is always pausing to mention where you can find them. Pythonesque if it weren't a real show (My philosophy teacher mentioned it in class once, me and one other guy knew what he was talking about and started laughing) :rofl:

0 likes

Does anyone here watch the 700 club? It's my favorite... :bag:

0 likes

Originally posted by Tristan Jayol Does anyone here watch the 700 club? It's my favorite... :bag:

PAT ROBERTSON THROUGH THE AGES

44 B.C. - "I know that a lot of people are saying 'How dare Caesar assume he is the ruler of Rome! Isn't he subverting the Republic?' Well, my friends, I know Caesar, he is an honorable man, he is standing up to those liberals in the Senate who want to open the gates wide open for the Visigoths and the Gauls to come pouring into Rome, to impose their libertine lifestyles upon us. And the Jews are a threat to us as well. So I ask you, my fellow Romans, to accept Caesar as your emporer and acknowledge his leadership, so that Rome will retain her might. The gods have told me there is a Senator afflicted with leprosy, I say by the great power of Apollo that you are healed."

1517 - "Martin Luther and all his liberal friends would have you believe that there's some other way to communicate with God than through your priest, and that the Word of God could be translated into common language. This is just another example of the liberal establishment trying to mock your beliefs, my friends. And what's more, Luther has even said that if you wanted to, you could actually divorce from your spouse and marry another! If this does not sound the death knell for the Christian family, then I don't know what does. Support the efforts of Cardinal Ximinez and other Inquisitors, and don't stand by while these amoral 'Protestants' wreck our very civilization. God through the Pope has informed me there is a cardinal afflicted with a wary flock, may the Lord strick them down and make them a fine example for the straying from Catholicism."

1618 - "My friends, this New World is plagued with unethical, liberal savages who want to indoctrinate you in the ways of the Devil. There's no way to get around it, these natives who plague our good, Christian settlers are nothing more than Satanic forces. The Lord has given us this land, it is ours to take and to hold in his name, and no redskined little bastard will sway us from our course. So I say unto you, win them to our faith, or let them suffer the might of our Lord. These liberals in our flock who preach that we should try and understand them, they will feel the wrath on Judgement Day. Good Mistress Prynne, I understand you have been touched with the demon seed while your husband lies rotting at the bottom of the ocean, may a baleful existence come upon you and yours."

1776 - "The British are not our enemies, it's the liberals like George Washington and Thomas 'Mix-Racer' Jefferson who are our enemies. We came from England, and while we have drifted from our forefathers, it is the fault of the liberal media who paint our kin across the sea as 'tyrants.' Well, folks, the only tyrants I see are the ones holed up in Philadelphia, talking about a 'Declaration of Independence.' It will be a 'Declaration of Treason' in reality. God has informed me that a watch-maker in Boston has a son in the Continental Army. May the Lord show him no mercy in the field against the legally armed British army."

1863 - "Abraham Lincoln is a menace to everything we as Americans hold dear, he's freeing the slaves and trying to keep the South from breaking off to fulfil the Lord's work. It's just all so heart-breaking to see our country come to this, and it's the liberal media to blame, yet again, for misleading the American public. 'Uncle Tom's Cabin was just the latest example of a liberal and un-Christian bias in the media, and the public bought it hook, line and sinker. It is my prayer that the Union army be put under a drunkard so as it may be victim to the Lord's wrath for visiting a plague upon this land."

1941 - "Adolph Hitler is a kind man, he wouldn't hurt a fly. But the liberals in the media, and those Jews out in Hollywood, would have you believe he is some kind of monster bent on world domination. He seeks merely to rid us of the fervently Communist Roosevelt Administration, and I for one welcome him. He's done some wonderful things in France and Russia, and God knows with the filth coming out in the cinema that Hollywood could stand a trip to the concentration camps. I have word that one of Adolph Eichmann's children isn't well, may the Lord grant you the grace of surviving your illness."

0 likes

that entry for 1941 reminds me of Marge Schott. Since I don't think anyone here is from Cincinnatti, I should be safe in dissing the damn Reds, but as much as I dislike the Reds now, Pete Rose will always be my hero :D

0 likes

Originally posted by Tristan Jayol that entry for 1941 reminds me of Marge Schott. Since I don't think anyone here is from Cincinnatti, I should be safe in dissing the damn Reds, but as much as I dislike the Reds now, Pete Rose will always be my hero :D

I'm gonna call it a night, but suffice it to say (now that I've made fun of Jack Van Impe, according to Third Thessolonians verses 13-27) I will be struck blind by the Lord's wrath as I go home and plunge into a portal to Hell.....

Goodnight everybody! :hi: :thumb: :evil4:

0 likes

That Hal Lindsay guy on TBN is HI-larious with his International News Report or whatever it's called. The news according to Jesus, is more like it. Plenty prejudiced against everyone who isn't a Godhead.

0 likes

You're leaving NewOrderOnline

This link goes to an external website we don't operate, which has its own privacy policy and terms.

Destination:
Continue ↗