Who are you voting for...?
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Homeland Security wants to know......
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George W. Bush 5 (19%)
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John Kerry 8 (31%)
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Ralph Nader 0 (0%)
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Jesus 1 (4%)
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Depeche Mode 2 (8%)
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Yanni 0 (0%)
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Dave Foley 1 (4%)
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The cast of "The OC" 0 (0%)
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Fraggle Rock 1 (4%)
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Generalissimo Franco 0 (0%)
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Troy McClure 0 (0%)
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Dagobah 1 (4%)
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Glenn Danzig 0 (0%)
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Grandpa Munster 1 (4%)
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The VMA Awards 0 (0%)
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Penis 1 (4%)
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Vagina 5 (19%)
26 votes · voting closed
Originally posted by Tristan For Mr. Order
The Heritage Foundation? Dear God... I may as well see what the Klan thinks..
Originally posted by carroll13 > Originally posted by Tristan> > > For Mr. Order> > >
The Heritage Foundation? Dear God... I may as well see what the Klan thinks..
Hey he uses NY and LA Times articles, so a Heritage article was in order. Next will come a dosage of Ann Coulter.
Originally posted by Ronald Kirsch The current incumbant is Little Johnny Howard, formerly known as "honest John". In case you didn't know it he is W's best mate.
Has anyone told Tony? He'll be most put out.
Originally posted by 404 error > Originally posted by Ronald Kirsch> The current incumbant is Little Johnny Howard, formerly known as "honest John". In case you didn't know it he is W's best mate.
Has anyone told Tony? He'll be most put out.
Blair isn't Bush's mate. He just tends to bend over whenever Dick comes around.
Originally posted by bLuE oRdEr > Originally posted by Tristan> > > For Mr. Order> > >
Originally posted by A severe young man Ehhh if I were older... I'd vote for George W. Bush!
You are wise beyond your years. 
Originally posted by Sir CHUNKS > Originally posted by A severe young man> Ehhh if I were older... I'd vote for George W. Bush!
You are wise beyond your years.
And George W. is wise beyond his third "Hooked on Phonics" tape 
Is Nader still a viable candidate? :D
Listen, I'm just glad that, in a little over a week, all this partisan bickering will be over. I can't stand all this constant back-biting and overhyping and spinning and so on, on both sides. Yes, in a week it'll all be over............and the Bush Dictatorship will enter the first of its glorious Five-Year Plans 
:bag: 
Originally posted by bLuE oRdEr You know, voting twice and all that. ;)
"No, that was my brother Achmed Musstafa, I am Achmed Musstapha. We are two different people, and my rifle says so..."
Originally posted by Digital Mike Binoche im voting for Saddam
I see wanking to Juliette has left you shit for brains.
Porn For Progress Zaps Bush In New Adult DVD By: Penn N. Sword
HOLLYWOOD, Fla. - "This," says Dick Tater, executive producer of a new political satire Web site and adult DVD, Porn For Kerry: Fahrenheit 69, "is porn that wants to make you think before you blow your load."
It's certainly made for a few laughs courtesy of The Tonight Show with Jay Leno, whose irrepressible host couldn't resist a pass at the DVD, which is aiming to help raise money for the Massachusetts senator's presidential campaign in the so-called battleground states.
"Here's something really strange," Leno cracked on a recent show. "A group of porn stars have made a Porn for Kerry DVD to raise him campaign money. Remember the good old days when campaign volunteers were just licking envelopes?"
The Village Voice, the left-leaning weekly based in New York, has also weighed in on Porn For Kerry. "For committed anti-Bushites, the tragedy of being a New York resident is that your vote doesn't really count. How else to pitch in for the Democratic cause?" said a Q&A-style article by Voice writer Brendan I. Koerner, "Mr. Roboto," in mid-September.
"Perhaps by buying a copy of the Porn for Kerry DVD, described on the website as 'part political satire and part hardcore hot sex!' (Their exclamation point, natch.) Mr. Roboto can't verify whether it's true that 100 percent of the profits will go to the Kerry-Edwards campaign. But you've got to give some love to the twisted mind that conjured up a hot-tub scene between 'Jorge Bush' and his 'personal squad of sex minions'."
"Basically, we're a group of Ivy League graduates with a love of porn and a love of politics," Tater told AVNOnline.com, "and we wanted to do a project that would meld the two together. We created what I feel is the world's best, if not first, 'pornlitical' satire."
Tater was joined by director Rake Muckshot, developer Barry Hopkins, producer Wade Casper, and public relations group HelmutSaus in bringing the project off.
Tater admitted that bringing porn and politics together isn't always as cut-and-dried as people think, other than when politics tries to push porn back to the brown wrappers if it lets porn hang around at all.
"We kind of saw that a lot of people who watch porn are not into politics, and a lot of people who are into politics are not into porn," said Tater. "Porn For Kerry bridges that gap."
The DVD includes four themed vignettes, each satirizing one or another facet of the Bush presidency and even some of his family, notably the publicized-enough activities of the president's college-age daughters. In that vignette, one Genteel Bush has her apartment raided by Rugs Ridge and Homeland Security, where she has "bigger problems than alcoholism… swigging Jack Daniels while she's riding the guy cowgirl," Tater said.
The second vignette involves "Jorge Bush" visiting Saudi "King Fahk," who gives "Jorge" a special offer of liberated Iraqis to keep the oil flowing. "You see how Jorge lubes up with Iraqi oil before the sex minions come," Tater said.
The third features "Donnie Cumsfeld" given a tour of prison by "Private Lynndie Dickland," while the fourth features debaters "Ann Cunter" and "Al Frankenbeans" in a vicious debate before "Ann Cunter" is found "loving herself off with a handgun with Al Frankebeans walking in on her," Tater said.
"We're trying not only to have hot porn but to point our what we see as the moral hypocrisy of the right," he added. "We're trying to kind of show this war is about oil, trying to point out and remind people of these scandals. It's hot porn with an intellectual, humorous edge to it."
Though the proceeds may be targeted to the Kerry campaign – the Kerry campaign itself hasn't yet made any known comment about Porn For Kerry –Tater isn't exactly ringing a big note of optimism for Kerry himself so much as he's trying to ring a big thumbs down to the incumbent.
"I'm not going to make a political statement either way," he said, "but we've seen over the past four years the country has not gone in a positive direction. And we'd like to give Kerry the opportunity the opportunity to take the reins of our country. It's very unrealistic to think he's going to take us right out of Iraq, or fix the economy, but we'd like to give him the chance because we need a change."
40 Excuses And A Mule October 27, 2004
White liberals have been indulging their fantasies of violence against conservatives lately – physically attacking conservatives, ransacking Bush-Cheney headquarters (though not any NRA headquarters, I note). The white wife of vice presidential candidate John Edwards recently warned of riots unless Kerry is elected.
In the midst of this rash of violence by white liberals, this week Al Gore admonished a group of blacks not to engage in violence over the election. Perhaps Gore should have saved that speech for a convocation of Moveon.org members.
And Democrats wonder why they have to ask white people to hold "African-Americans for Kerry-Edwards" signs at their rallies – as happened in St. Petersburg, Fla., last Saturday. The Kerry campaign is hemorrhaging black voters like teenaged girls fleeing an R. Kelly house party. None of the Democrats' top black leaders – Jesse, Al, Bill Clinton – has been able to stem the tide.
Here's the deal on politics and race in America: Republicans don't need black voters, but they want them. Democrats don't want black voters, but they need them. Blacks have been the Democrats' most loyal voters, typically giving the party upward of 90 percent of their vote. But Democrats ignore blacks.
That's according to none other than the Rev. Jesse Jackson, who said precisely that in a speech to "Campaign for America's Future" at the Democratic National Convention this summer.
Now, with the election less than a week away, the Kerry campaign is dashing off to every black church in the country. Bill Clinton had to interrupt an important sponge bath with someone named "Bunny" to come to Kerry's rescue in Philadelphia. (Possible slogan: "Kerry – The Same as Clinton, Without the Burning Sensation.")
The Democrats' inspired 11th-hour message to black voters is: Here are your crumbs, your scraps, your measly handouts. Too bad you're so childish, incompetent and dependent, huh? Now run along and cast your vote for the guy with the "D" next to his name and we'll see you in four years, 'K? Buh-bye, now.
With no fanfare, President Bush has placed black stars like Condoleezza Rice and Colin Powell in top positions in his administration. Kerry waited for complaints that the only black people in his campaign were setting up folding chairs at rallies before finding blacks for any prominent positions. (Another campaign slogan: "John Kerry: Pretending to Fight for Blacks Since Very Recently.")
Among loony liberal ideas polling especially badly among blacks is the Democrats' gusto for gay marriage.
Gay marriage is a tricky issue for the Democrats due to the fact that – like taxes, defense and education – they are forced to lie about their position when running for office. In other words, Democrats are gay marriage supporters trapped in the bodies of candidates who oppose gay marriage. And no issue-reassignment surgery can help them.
By contrast, blacks – like Republicans and most Americans in general – not only believe gay marriage is wrong, but are willing to publicly state this belief.
Bush opposes gay marriage. Kerry is for it – and he has always been consistent on that by taking every position imaginable on gay marriage. Kerry's got more gay marriage positions than the Kama-sutra, including the "yawning dog," the "courtesan's dilemma" and the "flip-flopping weasel."
Campaigning in Missouri about a month ago, Kerry began the day saying he was opposed to Missouri's constitutional amendment defining marriage as between a man and a woman. By the end of the day, Kerry was claiming he supported the amendment and, indeed, that his position on gay marriage was identical to Bush's.
Later, Kerry retracted his support for the Missouri marriage amendment, telling a gay magazine that he hadn't read the amendment and, in fact, he opposed it. (More campaign slogan ideas: "John Kerry won't just take a stand on the tough issues – he'll take two or three of them!")
When Kerry's strategy of being both for gay marriage and against it failed to fool blacks, he sent Jesse Jackson out to black churches to tell the parishioners to set aside their views on gay marriage and vote for Kerry anyway. What are blacks getting out of this deal again?
Compensating for his progressive views on gay marriage, Kerry supports federal funding for partial-birth abortions. Taxpayer-supported abortion on demand should make "Emily's List" feminists happy, but it has not been a big hit with black ministers.
Margaret Sanger, the founder of Planned Parenthood, was quite explicit about using abortion as a tool to reduce the minority population. She said the goal of Planned Parenthood was to "give certain dysgenic groups in our population their choice of segregation or sterilization." Even today, talk to any white liberal about abortion and within 60 seconds he will raise the black "overpopulation" problem.
We hear a lot about the 2 million people in America's jails and how many of them are black, but we rarely talk about the 35 to 40 million abortions since Roe v. Wade and how many of those babies were black. When your position on black abortion is identical to the Klan's, maybe it's time to reconsider.
Kerry's supporters are reaching out to blacks by demanding that black cabdrivers in New York City who support Bush be fined and suspended. When taxi driver Etzer Jerome told his sensitive Upper West Side passenger he had voted for Bush, she demanded that he pull over and let her out, yelling at him: "How can a black man vote for Bush?" and "I'm going to f--- you!" She then filed a complaint against Jerome with the Taxi and Limousine Commission alleging that Jerome had "verbally harassed her." He was fined $500 and given a three-week suspension.
On the bright side, the Democrats offer black voters loads and loads of meaningless abstractions that will have absolutely no effect on their lives. "Jobs," for example. (Just not any of the important jobs in a Kerry administration.)
Democrats' extravagant claims about creating "jobs" are as credible as their claims that they will allow the wheelchair-bound to walk. Among the jobs that are currently not available to Americans are these being performed in China under a free-trade bill voted for by John Kerry. (New campaign slogan: "John Kerry: Betraying America Since 1971.")
And apparently, black voters can also look forward to a lot of patronizing demagoguery from the Democrats, such as the claim that Republicans maliciously suppressed the black vote in Florida in 2000.
Kerry claims Republicans disenfranchised 1 million black voters in Florida in 2000, but neglects to mention that after extensive and expensive hearings, the U.S. Civil Rights Commission failed to name a single one of them. Can you name just one out of that "million," Sen. Kerry? We've found more WMDs in Iraq than we've found disenfranchised blacks in Florida.
Indeed – to the contrary! – in 2000, blacks composed 11 percent of registered voters in Florida, but made up 17 percent of those who actually voted. If that's how Republicans "suppress" the black vote, blacks are better off when Republicans attack them than when Democrats pretend to be nice to them.
Originally posted by bLuE oRdEr Well, I can see why the author is too cowardly to sign such inflammatory bullshit.
It's Ann Coulter, and most of it is not bullshit. Mucho sarcasm.
