Favorite Asshole From History

You know, as long as there has been history, there have been assholes to mess it up. So let's take some time to mark the biggest assholes in the history of mankind. I've selected my picks, feel free to offer your own if you find my list lacking.

an explanation of some:

The Inquisition was certainly not one person (but a very funny MP sketch), it inspired ever more horrendous religious persecution under the guise of official sanction. Thus it trumps the Salem Witch Trials, all the religious wars, George W' Bush's administration, etc. :p

Andrew Jackson was rabidly anti-Indian, and forced the migration of thousands of Cherokees along the Trail of Tears. Somewhere in hell, he's sharing a pineapple up the ass with Stalin and Hitler.

I don't recall the guy who founded the KKK, but he was a Confederate veteran in Tennessee around 1866 who really didn't get it that the war was over. He also didn't get it that murdering former slaves is just as wrong as having them as slaves in the first place.

Huey Long was the governor of Louisiana who could very well have been a tyrant in the making had he not been gunned down in 1935. There may be efforts to revise his legacy and hold him up as a good man. But the facts speak for themself. Certainly not a fascist dictator on the scale of Hitler or even Mussolini, but he could've been...

The EG Border Patrol, specifically the one that guarded the Wall, killed countless individuals seeking freedom from Commie oppression. However many threads there are now about Communisium :p

The dicks at NASA who pushed the Challenger mission even though there was evidence of potential danger are assholes, no question about it. But they obviously aren't as dense as whoever pushed the Columbia mission as well. Twenty years pass and NASA still doesn't get it: if you send people up in faulty aircraft, they die.

I fucking hate hackers. Fucking hate all of them. They need to be neutered and spayed, and given the old "Johnny Got His Gun" treatment (no arms, no legs). Also, whoever invented spam, email viruses, and all pop-ups just needs to die.

I almost put Bush, but he never ordered thirteen guys to fly some planes into buildings full of people. Only one guy did that, and he's an asshole more than Bush.

Anyway, feel free to reply with your own "asshole" if my list does not suffice.

that's tough--hitler or stalin. i'm going with hitler because of his plan to exterminate the jews. yes, stalin may be responsible for the deaths of more people, but hitler was so clinical and prepared when he focused on his targets. not to mention, i don't think stalin was really an international threat (despite being a national nightmare). hitler wanted to take over the world.

by the way, nathan bedford forrest founded the ku klux klan.

Taboo # 7 wrote:

I don't recall the guy who founded the KKK, but he was a Confederate veteran in Tennessee around 1866 who really didn't get it that the war was over. He also didn't get it that murdering former slaves is just as wrong as having them as slaves in the first place.

Nathan Bedford Forrest.

Erm, not my pick, just the cunt who was the first grand Wizard.

Michelle, a girl i work with

Taboo # 7 wrote: Communisium

Is that the new high-tech people's metal?

pumped full of drugs wrote: Michelle, a girl i work with

But in all of history?...well, women can be assholes too (Mary Queen of Scots, Marie Antionette, Katie Couric, etc). I guess I'm showing my chavinist side by not including a few females on the list...hmm, perhaps a "bitches of history"...nah, I've started too many threads lately. I need to go into hibernation

Comrade Shampanyov wrote:

Taboo # 7 wrote: Communisium

Is that the new high-tech people's metal?

yeah. it's what the hammer and sickle are made of.

Comrade Shampanyov wrote:

Taboo # 7 wrote: Communisium

Is that the new high-tech people's metal?

I wasn't sure if it was that or "Communisim"..."Communisum"?

Shet, Eye Kan'te Speel Wurth A Fark 2Nite

It's OK, Woodsy set us straight.

Taboo # 7 wrote:

pumped full of drugs wrote: Michelle, a girl i work with

But in all of history?...well, women can be assholes too (Mary Queen of Scots, Marie Antionette, Katie Couric, etc). I guess I'm showing my chavinist side by not including a few females on the list...hmm, perhaps a "bitches of history"...nah, I've started too many threads lately. I need to go into hibernation

well, i'm pissed at her right now... and Richard nixon is looking pretty good now in hindsight

what about the Roman Emperors...? maybe Nero...

got to be Hitler.

pumped full of drugs wrote:

Taboo # 7 wrote:

pumped full of drugs wrote: Michelle, a girl i work with

But in all of history?...well, women can be assholes too (Mary Queen of Scots, Marie Antionette, Katie Couric, etc). I guess I'm showing my chavinist side by not including a few females on the list...hmm, perhaps a "bitches of history"...nah, I've started too many threads lately. I need to go into hibernation

well, i'm pissed at her right now... and Richard nixon is looking pretty good now in hindsight

what about the Roman Emperors...? maybe Nero...

Nah, those fall under "Jackasses of History", along with:

Napoleon Dick Clark General George Pickett Mussolini David Copperfield (the magician, not the book) LBJ William Jennings Bryan Pat Robertson Comrade Shampanyov :p

Hitler.

Comrade Shampanyov wrote: It's OK, Woodsy set us straight.

КОММУНИЗМ.

(communism)

Taboo # 7 wrote: Comrade Shampanyov

AgentWood wrote:

Comrade Shampanyov wrote: It's OK, Woodsy set us straight.

КОММУНИЗМ.

(communism)

Perhaps it's time.....to invest in some Hooked-On-Phonics

I learnt to spake gud den!

Ian Paisley.

Fanned the flames of the Troubles, then claimed it had nothing to do with him.

Here he is in smiley form:

:angry2:

KKK geezer and Hitler joint 1st.

Bush wins for the 21st Century- just how many innocent civilians have died in Iraq because of him? Far more than would have died under Saddam (although he is pure evil) and far more than Osama has killed (again pure evil).

Bush is as bad as Osama in my eyes!

geldof, bono & Elton John

George "Anti-Christ Incarnate" W. Bush

W

Hitler. No contest IMO.

Followed by my ex!

Kathy Lee Gifford

john kershaw wrote: geldof, bono & Elton John

That's a bit harsh on Elton John. Oh no it isn't. I've just heard his bit on the cover of Ever Fallen in Love.

I always wanted to pentrate Kathy Lee's asshole

twist wrote: I always wanted to pentrate Kathy Lee's asshole

Can I nominate the above post as Best Way to Kill a Thread in 2005?

DIGGY MIKE

Robbie Williams

Count Von Staufenberg for not shoving his briefcase up Hitlers arse and doing the job properly.

lavrenti beria

I can't believe good ole Tony Wilson isn't on the list.

As for the guy who founded the KKK, i went out for a meal the other week and in the bar there was this American guy talking about the founder of the KKK for some reason, don't know why i stumbled in half way throught the conversation, but he said that when it was founded by this American Civil war guy, it wasn't a rascist organization, but when people joined and pushed it that way the original founder left the group,

so the fella in the bar was in the KKK and just looking to defend it, but he was quite adement about the fact that it was never started out as a what it has become.

Christopher Owens wrote: Ian Paisley.

Fanned the flames of the Troubles, then claimed it had nothing to do with him.

Here he is in smiley form:

:angry2:

Him, & everyone else involved on both 'sides'

Or, we could just blame Cromwell for moving people around

or Brian Boru, for giving us the idea that this Island was one single country . . .

patrick stewart appreciation society wrote: I can't believe good ole Tony Wilson isn't on the list.

As for the guy who founded the KKK, i went out for a meal the other week and in the bar there was this American guy talking about the founder of the KKK for some reason, don't know why i stumbled in half way throught the conversation, but he said that when it was founded by this American Civil war guy, it wasn't a rascist organization, but when people joined and pushed it that way the original founder left the group,

so the fella in the bar was in the KKK and just looking to defend it, but he was quite adement about the fact that it was never started out as a what it has become.

Actually, he's at least partially right, although I fail to see how an organization founded to terrosize Republicans and keep the freed slaves in their place isn't "racist" by definition.

Fitz said

Count Von Staufenberg for not shoving his briefcase up Hitlers arse and doing the job properly

What about Herman Goering who was responsible for Hitler's political success? Goering gave the Nazi Party a legitimate face at least in terms with the wealthy industrialists. He was president of the Reichstag and was able to use this officve to set Hitler up. Goering alos was probably the last man that could have convinced Hitler that Germany should not start a war.

twist wrote: Fitz said

Count Von Staufenberg for not shoving his briefcase up Hitlers arse and doing the job properly

What about Herman Goering who was responsible for Hitler's political success? Goering gave the Nazi Party a legitimate face at least in terms with the wealthy industrialists. He was president of the Reichstag and was able to use this officve to set Hitler up. Goering alos was probably the last man that could have convinced Hitler that Germany should not start a war.

He also mismanaged the Luftwaffe into becoming little more than cannon fodder for the RAF and the anti-aircraft guns when he stopped bombing airfields and started bombing London. That was a huge mistake in the Nazi war plan, because they could have wiped out the RAF if they'd continued. Of course, no one ever accused the Germans of being smart :p

I think, though, Hitler was the main guy. You can't have the camps, the war, the ghettos, the death and destruction, without a one-balled ex-corporal from a little town in Austria. And he's a major-league asshole

God... I blame him for everything if he exists

The jerk who shaterred my sister-in-law's winsheild.