A few not so great things about Britain....
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that fucking restaurant that tried to trick me into eating rabbit kidneys...what the fuck is that all about???
beans for breakfast???
that's the only two I can come up with....
oh yeah, forgot about this one...Friday night, opening for the Streets...Lady Sovereign...that was possibly the worst fucking thing I have ever been subjected to...
*if she's not a Brit, I sincerely apologize.
the weather, wankers with flags on their house, car or anywhere else during tournaments they are NEVER gonna win. jamie oliver, simply red, shitehouse family, all these fucking cooking programmes, all them fucking DIY programmes, all them fucking reality programmes, postmen who turn up when they want, people whop end sentences with ducky, love or sweetheart, right wing torie fuckwits like Liam, hippies, shit music festivals that are hyped up beyond belief, cheap and nasty supermarkets like Lidl and Aldi, sugarfree chewing gum that isnae sugarfree, orville the duck, the royal family, lester piggott, jenson button and damon hill, people who chase foxes on large horses for a laugh, boybands, girlbands, english rappers, jodie marsh, jordan and all them fannies who are famous for flashing their tits in the papers, mushrooms, black pudding, brussel sprouts, cabbage, chavs, hoodies, over 25 nightclubs who don't let me in cos i don't look old enough, bouncers with attitude, dj's with attitude, attitude itself, shakespeare and all them other poets whose words mean fcuk all to anyone except weirdos, buses that don't turn up on time, trains that do the same, hair gel which doesn't do what it says on the tin, insurance advertisements, advertisements during football games, croquet, lawn bowling, dry ski slopes, paddling boats, the seaside and the justice system.
Wales Wales Wales Wales Wales Wales Wales Wales Wales Wales Wales Wales Wales Wales Wales Wales
Driving the left side of the road The fact that they might be in my face if I spell something wrong Not understanding my type of humor while I can understand theirs (oh, I Americanized my spelling just now. :D )
shite customer service, queues, Tony Blair and his incompetent fuckwit ministers who couldnt organise a piss-up in a brewery, chavs, people who hunt foxes, B,C,D list 'celebs', reality TV programmes, Chris Moyles, being ripped off all the time.
[brown]Ally[/brown] wrote: Queues
Please mister Arse, that is what I call a naughty statement...
Dentists (or lack of them - where the fuck are they???) The lack of decent chippies being replaced by kebab shops... Trains (how much for a ticket? What do you mean that I can't buy a saver ticket for this train??) Chavs The weather (if we're supposed to have global warming, where was the sun in March???) Big Brother, I'm A Celebrity, etc - fuck reality TV programmes
God, this is fun - I'll think of some more soon! 
Nick King wrote: Dentists (or lack of them - where the fuck are they???)
Read an article in the NYTimes about a month ago (Sarah Lyall on 7 May) that said that most dentists are abandoning the health service and going into private practice, leaving a lot of citizens to DIY dentistry.
[darkgreen]Green[/darkgreen] wrote:
Nick King wrote: Dentists (or lack of them - where the fuck are they???)
Read an article in the NYTimes about a month ago (Sarah Lyall on 7 May) that said that most dentists are abandoning the health service and going into private practice, leaving a lot of citizens to DIY dentistry.
This is very true - virtually impossible to find a dentist on the NHS nowadays - only option is to go private... Costs a bleedin' fortune... 
Hope ya don't mind Nick, I sent an e-mail of the article to your addy in your post, for a little more info.
Nick King wrote:
[darkgreen]Green[/darkgreen] wrote:
Nick King wrote: Dentists (or lack of them - where the fuck are they???)
Read an article in the NYTimes about a month ago (Sarah Lyall on 7 May) that said that most dentists are abandoning the health service and going into private practice, leaving a lot of citizens to DIY dentistry.
This is very true - virtually impossible to find a dentist on the NHS nowadays - only option is to go private... Costs a bleedin' fortune...
Costs a bleedin' fortune here too. Comrade's dental plan is "It can wait."
Nick King wrote: The lack of decent chippies being replaced by kebab shops...
It is also a plague on the Continent. I cannot believe it. I have nothing against it really, but this is like fast-food restaurants by now. Too many of these... There is a joke here. What is typical for Parisian gastronomy ? Kebab sandwiches...
Nick King wrote: Trains (how much for a ticket? What do you mean that I can't buy a saver ticket for this train??)
They often are on strike here, but when they work, they are efficient... It is so efficient that I wonder if it is French sometimes... But British railways, this is like paying an outstanding expansive ticket for a ride through the ages... I wonder if it is the train or the cows in the landscape that move...
The monarchy Sir Paul and the drummer as the only two surviving Fab Four George Michael Tony Blair Liam Gallagher Phil Collins
This blue-eyed boy that wants to be wrote: The Spice Girls Wham The Happy Mondays Tesco
do you mean
Happy Mondays??
no the in front...and they weren't bad at all...
My Name Is John Barnes wrote:
This blue-eyed boy that wants to be wrote: The Spice Girls Wham The Happy Mondays Tesco
do you mean
Happy Mondays??
no the in front...and they weren't bad at all...
Yes, I mean them. And, like most of the artists on Factory, sans NO/JD/Electronic, they were awful. Can't stand Shawn Ryder or Bez.
[brown]Ally[/brown] wrote: Queues
???? Are you joking man?! Queues are what make this country great. Try visiting more uncivilised nations and dealing with their lack of queuing ettiquette. Try getting on a bus in China, buying a six pack in a 7-11 in Tenerife or trying to get near the steaks at a Las Vegas buffet. Horrendous. Savages the lot of 'em.
The miserable weather
The miserable people
The aggression and rudeness in our daily 'street life' and our binge drinking culture
The way in international affairs we always end up as the pint-sized sidekick of the big kid in the playground (aka the USA).
That we are second only to the US in the Lardarse league, and that we let our cities be completely and utterly dominated by cars, which people refuse to get out of despite the fact that its usually quicker to walk.
That we have ended up with the worst of all worlds, as far as capitalism vs socialism is concerned, with an incompentent government paying huge sums of tax-payers money to greedy profiteering private companies who then completely f*** everything up and have to be given even more public money (see the Tube, the railways, the water companies, Air Traffic Control, City Acadamies, PFI hospitals...)
The fact that we can't even be smug about our TV compared to the US, since the advent of HBO (the Americans now apparently _do_ get irony, and they can sustain their good shows for more than 12 episodes).
Coldplay.
Keane.
James bleedin' Blunt
And most of all... The showers only do freezing hot or scalding cold with nothing in between.
Oh yeah, and the fact we've actually had mass unemployment for the past 25 years (in part hidden on the sick lists) but we've gotten so used to it we don't even notice it any more, and even refer to it as 'historically low', and exhbit unmerited smugness when talking about the unemployment in the Eurozone.
Oh, and the sick joke of a criminal justice system. We seem to be moving to a system intended to punish the sick and the unemployed while being soft on violent criminals. Soft on crime, soft on the causes of crime?
Nothing so terrible that the good points don't make up for... Despite how much I moan about the place, it's still great 
SHEDi xxx
Plain Lazy wrote:
Flaming June wrote: All of the above
Liar!!
You do put vinegar on your chips & crisps
Well spotted ,Maya 1 pint
Paparazzi and the crap Sun and Star newspapers Crap customer service and rude shop assistants Traffic jams Darkness at 4pm in the winter Faggots (the ones you eat)
I dunno where this crap customer service thing comes from.
Most folks in shops here, barring the obvious 17 yrold failed hairdressers are very friendly and helpful. And certainly in my last few trips around the northern half of te mainland it's been like that too. I know I rip on southerners, but surely, they can't be such a bunch of miserable twats as to drag the whole country down. And come to think of it, last time I was in London, a long time ago, everyone who spoke English WAS really nice, at least in shops and stuff....the herding in the streets is part of what puts me off the place.
We were staying with family in Leicester for Christmas in 2004, hence we were out doing a lot of shopping. I found that a good majority of the staff working in shops were just miserable and unwilling to help. Mr B, who is English, even mentioned that the staff working in shops here in Oz were much more friendly and ready to assist. Maybe it was just the bloody miserable winter weather but I have to say that I have English friends who went back for a holiday and said the same thing. They were in England for 4 weeks and went skiing in Austria for 1 week - they found the service much better over there.
were they all 17 yrold failed hairdressers tho? :D I must confess I've heard a few people ONLY a few in my work, when I have been unfortunate enough to be in during the day, being downright rude and unhelpful to people, but they are the exception. Besides, I totally forgive people being miserable working somewhere like asda where the call staff off their breaks and sack em if they don;t come and crap like that.
Yeah, alot of them were probably young kids put on for Christmas I guess. And Leicester is pretty depressing at the best of times!!
Absolutely love England though.
Some of the silliest fookin contests in the world. I saw this morning that they had a nettles eating contest in England. Saw something equally daft and masochistic a week or two ago from England but don't remember what it was now.
Shellshocker wrote: Some of the silliest fookin contests in the world. I saw this morning that they had a nettles eating contest in England. Saw something equally daft and masochistic a week or two ago from England but don't remember what it was now.
Japan has to be the worst for that though surely
the fact that we created 90%(maybe slightyly OTT) of the worlds sports and now we're shit at them.
Minx wrote:
Shellshocker wrote: Some of the silliest fookin contests in the world. I saw this morning that they had a nettles eating contest in England. Saw something equally daft and masochistic a week or two ago from England but don't remember what it was now.
Japan has to be the worst for that though surely
I just recalled some others I've heard of recently from England: cheese rolling contest (rolling cheese down a hill), bog snorkelling contest, toe wrestling championship.
Shellshocker wrote:
Minx wrote:
Shellshocker wrote: Some of the silliest fookin contests in the world. I saw this morning that they had a nettles eating contest in England. Saw something equally daft and masochistic a week or two ago from England but don't remember what it was now.
Japan has to be the worst for that though surely
I just recalled some others I've heard of recently from England: cheese rolling contest (rolling cheese down a hill), bog snorkelling contest, toe wrestling championship.
There is a worm charming contest next month in a village just 15 miutes drive from where I live.
Worm charming.
Even Flow wrote: itv football
i wish it was all on bbc
Correct!
Although Steve Rider is pretty cool.
Tyldsley though. what a cunt.
Uncle Liam wrote: Tyldsley though. what a cunt.
We've got a sweep for later for his first mention of "that night in Barcelona".
I drew 'After the 1st minute'.
I've lost already. 
Tyldesley is like ITV's number 1 guy though, so he will probably be commentating on the England game.
Martin Tyler and Andy Gray are the best, but I prefer any BBC people to ITV.
Ay,don't be knocking the Post Office and Keane!!
I've got one....dickheads who don't use indicators when they're driving round roundabouts!
when the weather changes. like today. fuckin freezin and blowin a gale. that two weeks of sun we just had. that's it. summers over:( :\ohwell:
Shug wrote: the weather, wankers with flags on their house, car or anywhere else during tournaments they are NEVER gonna win. jamie oliver, simply red, shitehouse family, all these fucking cooking programmes, all them fucking DIY programmes, all them fucking reality programmes, postmen who turn up when they want, people whop end sentences with ducky, love or sweetheart, right wing torie fuckwits like Liam, hippies, shit music festivals that are hyped up beyond belief, cheap and nasty supermarkets like Lidl and Aldi, sugarfree chewing gum that isnae sugarfree, orville the duck, the royal family, lester piggott, jenson button and damon hill, people who chase foxes on large horses for a laugh, boybands, girlbands, english rappers, jodie marsh, jordan and all them fannies who are famous for flashing their tits in the papers, mushrooms, black pudding, brussel sprouts, cabbage, chavs, hoodies, over 25 nightclubs who don't let me in cos i don't look old enough, bouncers with attitude, dj's with attitude, attitude itself, shakespeare and all them other poets whose words mean fcuk all to anyone except weirdos, buses that don't turn up on time, trains that do the same, hair gel which doesn't do what it says on the tin, insurance advertisements, advertisements during football games, croquet, lawn bowling, dry ski slopes, paddling boats, the seaside and the justice system.
That about does it for me!
