Internet Dating

Chatting to a friend who is thinking about giving it a go, hopefully I will never have to do this sort of thing, but the question is.....Do you tell the truth about yourself and post a picture of you as you actually are, OR do you lie your arse off and either post a picture of someone else far more gorgeous or post a picture of yourself when you feel you were at your best irrespective of the fact that you were only 20 at the time it was taken(when the said person is 40)?

Thought this may be a bit of lighthearted fun.

sorry can't help you there. i've never done it.

tell her, i don't think its a good idea. last time i did that, the girl ended up leaving me for a midget.

lucyjane wrote: Chatting to a friend who is thinking about giving it a go, hopefully I will never have to do this sort of thing, but the question is.....Do you tell the truth about yourself and post a picture of you as you actually are, OR do you lie your arse off and either post a picture of someone else far more gorgeous or post a picture of yourself when you feel you were at your best irrespective of the fact that you were only 20 at the time it was taken(when the said person is 40)?

Thought this may be a bit of lighthearted fun.

That's not the question. Of course, you have to tell the truth. If not, a meeting could be very disappointing for both. The question is: Do you say all of you or do you leave some interesting questions not answered?

I did try this once, about 7 years ago. Told the truth but didn't give too much away, and posted a current photo. You have to leave something to talk about for the icebreaker!

Had quite a lot of interest but only went on one date, with a three-headed moose who had lied from her very first contact. Was out of there like a shot!

Bars are a lot easier.....

Sorry LJ, but Oh my God!!!

J.A.K. doesn't have a football avatar

What's going on?

oldmonkey wrote: Bars are a lot easier.....

... and you can see, what you get.

[orange]Missy Naranja[/orange] wrote: Sorry LJ, but Oh my God!!!

J.A.K. doesn't have a football avatar

What's going on?

Maybe he's gone all lovely, although thought he was ace on Saturday.

Back to the point though, for example, remember that horrid photo of you that Owens posted after the Apollo, you would hardly use it for online dating because it gives the wrong impression. If a bloke saw that he wouldn't get the idea of how gorgeous you really are (no lesbo jokes please!)

I could have brained him!

Yes, i've heard many stories about people turning up to meet, for example a young 6'2 Johnny Depp look alike, and actually finding a 48 year old midget who does look like Johnny Depp, but in Edward Scissorhands!!

People should be done under the Trade Descriptions Act for false advertising!!

I used to think internet dating was for saddo's, but it's not really taboo anymore. In fact it makes perfect sense with the busy lifestyles we have these days. I've never used internet dating, but i have met a whole load of brilliant people on t'internet (and you lot too )

Seems fairly simple to me, you pick out a photo where you consider yourself to look good, but nothing that's from more than say 1 or 2 years ago and not one that's been done in one of those studios where they use soft focus and try to make you look like someone you are not. I think you need a fairly decent pic to get interest but it's got to be a good thing to look as good as or better when you meet in real life.

I met a bloke through the web once and it was a good night out and we had a laugh; but my inital hesitation on the fact that he was too young for me was confirmed when I met him so it never went further..... Great boost to the old ego though.

confusion wrote:

oldmonkey wrote: Bars are a lot easier.....

... and you can see, what you get.

or drink to the point where you no longer care.....

Kronenberg helping mingers have sex since 1864

I gave this internet dateing ago last September put everything down in me profile but did not put a photograph on.It was abit slow at first then in November this woman made contact with me at first we just spoke over the phone sent a photo to her email and since then we see each other every weekend one week she will come over to Manchester and then i will go over to South Yorkshire.:)

I always think it's funny/sad when someone talks themselves up on the web, makes themselves out to be someone that they aren't, and when you meet them it's like

Happened to me fairly recently actually, I nearly pissed meself when I was introduced to someone who neither looked nor acted in character with how they wish to portray themselves online.

Luckily nearly everyone off here is genuine, what you read is what you get, personalities shine through loud and clear, which is what makes these socials before the gig such a good event.

Desmond Tierney wrote: I gave this internet dateing ago last September put everything down in me profile but did not put a photograph on.It was abit slow at first then in November this woman made contact with me at first we just spoke over the phone sent a photo to her email and since then we see each other every weekend one week she will come over to Manchester and then i will go over to South Yorkshire.:)

And she's lovely too, i've met her.

Bet she was gutted though

So it does work, I've met her too and she is fab. So, honesty is obviously the best policy.

Desmond Tierney wrote: I gave this internet dateing ago last September put everything down in me profile but did not put a photograph on.It was abit slow at first then in November this woman made contact with me at first we just spoke over the phone sent a photo to her email and since then we see each other every weekend one week she will come over to Manchester and then i will go over to South Yorkshire.:)

i went out with a girl from leeds. realised i hated the trip across the penines on Saturdays and Sundays, and sacked it off. (or was it the other way around)

[orange]Missy Naranja[/orange] wrote:

Desmond Tierney wrote: I gave this internet dateing ago last September put everything down in me profile but did not put a photograph on.It was abit slow at first then in November this woman made contact with me at first we just spoke over the phone sent a photo to her email and since then we see each other every weekend one week she will come over to Manchester and then i will go over to South Yorkshire.:)

And she's lovely too, i've met her.

Bet she was gutted though

oh is this the girl who went to NO with Des? She WAS lovely!

The original Kylie!

i had a long distance/internet thing going with someone from toronto for 2 YEARS !!. i went and stayed over there 3 times. we didnt meet on a dating site though,her mum lived in blackpool and she was over here visiting her when we met

[orange]Missy Naranja[/orange] wrote: The original Kylie!

Internet Disease From Encyclopedia Dramatica Displaying old, faded, blurred or otherwise non-descript photographs of oneself, taken with bad lighting and at awkward angles, on the Internets in order to make you appear more attractive to people online than you are IRL.

so can we all agree that the "extreme angled bust shot" works best.

:dribblemouth:

J.A.K wrote: so can we all agree that the "extreme angled bust shot" works best.

:dribblemouth:

hahah

Thanks to CM's very helpful guide, we can now at last decypher various blogs etc and reconcile them with reality!

Bet you wish you hadn't posted it now CM!

oldmonkey wrote: Thanks to CM's very helpful guide, we can now at last decypher various blogs etc and reconcile them with reality!

Bet you wish you hadn't posted it now CM!

Har har har.

My pics look like me despite current rumours.

confusion wrote:

oldmonkey wrote: Bars are a lot easier.....

... and you can see, what you get.

Not after a couple of beers though.....

I think Minx gave good advice.
And don't write off internet dating, I know a couple of people that have gotten married with someone they met on the internet. And they're even still married.

Spotnick wrote:

lucyjane wrote: Chatting to a friend who is thinking about giving it a go, hopefully I will never have to do this sort of thing, but the question is.....Do you tell the truth about yourself and post a picture of you as you actually are, OR do you lie your arse off and either post a picture of someone else far more gorgeous or post a picture of yourself when you feel you were at your best irrespective of the fact that you were only 20 at the time it was taken(when the said person is 40)?

Thought this may be a bit of lighthearted fun.

Well, depends actually of you...

Internet gives the opportunity to sell your hidden attributes, if your look is your main attribute, then there is no point in telling lies.

But from experience, better tell the truth... but even then, if a relation works well online and on the phone, it will always be the first real date that will be the full test, but if it works, then you are settled for real.

In my case, I always tell the truth and send a picture, although obviously I try that picture to advantage me the most ;)

Paid off, since that's how I met my wife, been 5 years now...

Good advise, and congrats on meeting your other half.

I've never met anyone from the internet but I can see the temptation. It is hard to find people, I think. I met my husband when we were in high school. I work in a female dominated field and I hate bars so I don't know how I would have gone about meeting men. I guess it is best to be honest if you're looking for a relationship on the internet. If the person is worth being with they should like you for what you are...that sounded corny...

I had a professor back at the tech college I attended before the uni I'm at now, the first day of class he was assisted by his wife who he'd met online and moved from Texas to the Carolinas to marry. Nothing even remotely odd about that, for sure, and if you could have seen both of them, you'd understand why they had to go to such extremes to meet someone that would be with them :p

Anyway, the guy is talking about Stephen King (it's an early American lit class, but he's talking about Stephen King), and he and his wife get into a heated arguement in front of the class as to whether or not King is "literary" compared to the great masters.

The next day, he came to class with a large cut on his forehead

Thus, my reluctance to try internet dating...

But as far as the honesty issue goes, there's a difference between being open and being brutally honest. You're trying to sell yourself, but not to the extent that someone comes into the dating situation expecting something that you're not (thus no pics of Brad Pitt when you really look like Bruce Vilanch). You don't have to write down your life story, but give them some kind of a handle on who you are as a potential mate.

That's my two cents as NOOL's resident "love doctor"

no experience with internet dating, but my buddy met his wife on the net. Their great together and i swear she is the girl version of him. So maybe the stars were aligned right.

It was'nt invented when I was available:\ohwell: Although I did have one approach that I had to decline because he was'nt my type

I've just started seeing someone I met from an online dating site. Neither of us lied about anything, so it's been going alright so far. Just don't make yourself come off as some horny sex pot and you'll probably be alright.

I never liked going to bars, except to drink white Russians. One time I went, someone twice my age at least began groping me or else, everyone is already involved there.

Met a girl a year and a half ago in the Retroforward Radio chatroom, turned out she was fairly local, so I chatted her up a bit for a few months and then we hit it off. Been with her ever since and we're moving to San Francisco together next month. So good things can happen...but it was never really an internet dating website thing (thank fook).

Boatraceface wrote: It was'nt invented when I was available:\ohwell: Although I did have one approach that I had to decline because he was'nt my type

All beware the Gay Icon-- resistance is futile!

Desmond Tierney wrote: I gave this internet dateing ago last September put everything down in me profile but did not put a photograph on.It was abit slow at first then in November this woman made contact with me at first we just spoke over the phone sent a photo to her email and since then we see each other every weekend one week she will come over to Manchester and then i will go over to South Yorkshire.:)

She's a lovely lady! You make a smashing couple.

Wish I met my ex-wife on t'internet,it would have been easier shutting her up by pulling the plug!

Met me wife (ex-wife, whatever) on the net....worked out good for a few years, but now seems kaput..

Fun as a late teenager, never again though

Had a Marine some years back, when I was stationed in South Carolina, that tried this. He was a goodlooking guy and had no problems meeting girls in person. He met this lawyer that lived in New Jersey. She had a masters, making great money, in her low 30s, and supplied this drop dead gorgeous picture of herself. All he did was talk about her, this and that, for months. They talked and typed for months, until she agreed to come out. He got a cabin up in the mountians for the 4 day weekend get-away. He also had her come to his workplace to have her pick him up, to show off the fresh catch. Well, it was a bit of a suprise, as the picture she supplied was of her, but from about 6 years earlier when she was about 70 lbs lighter. Later, the story was that they had a heated arguement on their way up to the mountians. They stayed up there because he had already paid for the cabin in advance, and her plane ticket was irreversible, but they hated every moment together. Of course when he got back we all made fun of his "great" catch that he had been blowing up for so many months.

LESSONS:

1. On the first date, meet them where your friends aren't.

2. Don't pay in advance for some expensive getaway, or at least have a way to back out if it goes terribly wrong.

JHC

68Pontiac wrote: Had a Marine some years back, when I was stationed in South Carolina, that tried this. He was a goodlooking guy and had no problems meeting girls in person. He met this lawyer that lived in New Jersey. She had a masters, making great money, in her low 30s, and supplied this drop dead gorgeous picture of herself. All he did was talk about her, this and that, for months. They talked and typed for months, until she agreed to come out. He got a cabin up in the mountians for the 4 day weekend get-away. He also had her come to his workplace to have her pick him up, to show off the fresh catch. Well, it was a bit of a suprise, as the picture she supplied was of her, but from about 6 years earlier when she was about 70 lbs lighter. Later, the story was that they had a heated arguement on their way up to the mountians. They stayed up there because he had already paid for the cabin in advance, and her plane ticket was irreversible, but they hated every moment together. Of course when he got back we all made fun of his "great" catch that he had been blowing up for so many months.

LESSONS:

1. On the first date, meet them where your friends aren't.

2. Don't pay in advance for some expensive getaway, or at least have a way to back out if it goes terribly wrong.

JHC

Sounds like a bad movie!