Internet Dating

Spotnick wrote:

lucyjane wrote: Chatting to a friend who is thinking about giving it a go, hopefully I will never have to do this sort of thing, but the question is.....Do you tell the truth about yourself and post a picture of you as you actually are, OR do you lie your arse off and either post a picture of someone else far more gorgeous or post a picture of yourself when you feel you were at your best irrespective of the fact that you were only 20 at the time it was taken(when the said person is 40)?

Thought this may be a bit of lighthearted fun.

Well, depends actually of you...

Internet gives the opportunity to sell your hidden attributes, if your look is your main attribute, then there is no point in telling lies.

But from experience, better tell the truth... but even then, if a relation works well online and on the phone, it will always be the first real date that will be the full test, but if it works, then you are settled for real.

In my case, I always tell the truth and send a picture, although obviously I try that picture to advantage me the most ;)

Paid off, since that's how I met my wife, been 5 years now...

Good advise, and congrats on meeting your other half.

I've never met anyone from the internet but I can see the temptation. It is hard to find people, I think. I met my husband when we were in high school. I work in a female dominated field and I hate bars so I don't know how I would have gone about meeting men. I guess it is best to be honest if you're looking for a relationship on the internet. If the person is worth being with they should like you for what you are...that sounded corny...

I had a professor back at the tech college I attended before the uni I'm at now, the first day of class he was assisted by his wife who he'd met online and moved from Texas to the Carolinas to marry. Nothing even remotely odd about that, for sure, and if you could have seen both of them, you'd understand why they had to go to such extremes to meet someone that would be with them :p

Anyway, the guy is talking about Stephen King (it's an early American lit class, but he's talking about Stephen King), and he and his wife get into a heated arguement in front of the class as to whether or not King is "literary" compared to the great masters.

The next day, he came to class with a large cut on his forehead

Thus, my reluctance to try internet dating...

But as far as the honesty issue goes, there's a difference between being open and being brutally honest. You're trying to sell yourself, but not to the extent that someone comes into the dating situation expecting something that you're not (thus no pics of Brad Pitt when you really look like Bruce Vilanch). You don't have to write down your life story, but give them some kind of a handle on who you are as a potential mate.

That's my two cents as NOOL's resident "love doctor"

no experience with internet dating, but my buddy met his wife on the net. Their great together and i swear she is the girl version of him. So maybe the stars were aligned right.

It was'nt invented when I was available:\ohwell: Although I did have one approach that I had to decline because he was'nt my type

I've just started seeing someone I met from an online dating site. Neither of us lied about anything, so it's been going alright so far. Just don't make yourself come off as some horny sex pot and you'll probably be alright.

I never liked going to bars, except to drink white Russians. One time I went, someone twice my age at least began groping me or else, everyone is already involved there.

Met a girl a year and a half ago in the Retroforward Radio chatroom, turned out she was fairly local, so I chatted her up a bit for a few months and then we hit it off. Been with her ever since and we're moving to San Francisco together next month. So good things can happen...but it was never really an internet dating website thing (thank fook).

Boatraceface wrote: It was'nt invented when I was available:\ohwell: Although I did have one approach that I had to decline because he was'nt my type

All beware the Gay Icon-- resistance is futile!

Desmond Tierney wrote: I gave this internet dateing ago last September put everything down in me profile but did not put a photograph on.It was abit slow at first then in November this woman made contact with me at first we just spoke over the phone sent a photo to her email and since then we see each other every weekend one week she will come over to Manchester and then i will go over to South Yorkshire.:)

She's a lovely lady! You make a smashing couple.

Wish I met my ex-wife on t'internet,it would have been easier shutting her up by pulling the plug!

Met me wife (ex-wife, whatever) on the net....worked out good for a few years, but now seems kaput..

Fun as a late teenager, never again though

Had a Marine some years back, when I was stationed in South Carolina, that tried this. He was a goodlooking guy and had no problems meeting girls in person. He met this lawyer that lived in New Jersey. She had a masters, making great money, in her low 30s, and supplied this drop dead gorgeous picture of herself. All he did was talk about her, this and that, for months. They talked and typed for months, until she agreed to come out. He got a cabin up in the mountians for the 4 day weekend get-away. He also had her come to his workplace to have her pick him up, to show off the fresh catch. Well, it was a bit of a suprise, as the picture she supplied was of her, but from about 6 years earlier when she was about 70 lbs lighter. Later, the story was that they had a heated arguement on their way up to the mountians. They stayed up there because he had already paid for the cabin in advance, and her plane ticket was irreversible, but they hated every moment together. Of course when he got back we all made fun of his "great" catch that he had been blowing up for so many months.

LESSONS:

1. On the first date, meet them where your friends aren't.

2. Don't pay in advance for some expensive getaway, or at least have a way to back out if it goes terribly wrong.

JHC

68Pontiac wrote: Had a Marine some years back, when I was stationed in South Carolina, that tried this. He was a goodlooking guy and had no problems meeting girls in person. He met this lawyer that lived in New Jersey. She had a masters, making great money, in her low 30s, and supplied this drop dead gorgeous picture of herself. All he did was talk about her, this and that, for months. They talked and typed for months, until she agreed to come out. He got a cabin up in the mountians for the 4 day weekend get-away. He also had her come to his workplace to have her pick him up, to show off the fresh catch. Well, it was a bit of a suprise, as the picture she supplied was of her, but from about 6 years earlier when she was about 70 lbs lighter. Later, the story was that they had a heated arguement on their way up to the mountians. They stayed up there because he had already paid for the cabin in advance, and her plane ticket was irreversible, but they hated every moment together. Of course when he got back we all made fun of his "great" catch that he had been blowing up for so many months.

LESSONS:

1. On the first date, meet them where your friends aren't.

2. Don't pay in advance for some expensive getaway, or at least have a way to back out if it goes terribly wrong.

JHC

Sounds like a bad movie!