Total Eclipse

American Scientists has predicted several Solar Eclipses across America, when the Cure Tour.

FAT BOB and his FAT ARSE will block the sun out at the following venues:-

Patriot Center, Fairfax, VA Friday May 09 2008

Wachovia Spectrum, Philadelphia, PA Saturday May 10 2008

Agganis Arena, Boston, MA Monday May 12 2008

Bell Centre, Montréal, QC Wednesday May 14 2008

Air Canada Centre, Toronto, ON Thursday May 15 2008

Allstate Arena, Rosemont, IL Saturday May 17 2008

Starlight Theatre, Kansas City, MO Monday May 19 2008

Red Rocks Amphitheatre, Morrison, CO Wednesday May 21 2008

E Center, Salt Lake City, UT Friday May 23 2008

Gorge Amphitheatre, Quincy, WA Sunday May 25 2008

General Motors Place, Vancouver, BC Monday May 26 2008

HP Pavilion at San Jose, San Jose, CA Wednesday May 28 2008

Santa Barbara Bowl, Santa Barbara, CA Thursday May 29 2008

Hollywood Bowl, Los Angeles, CA Saturday May 31 2008

Shrine Auditorium, Los Angeles, CA Sunday June 01 2008

Cox Arena, San Diego, CA Tuesday June 03 2008

Dodge Theatre, Phoenix, AZ Wednesday June 04 2008

American Airlines Center - TX, Dallas, TX Friday June 06 2008

Austin Music Hall, Austin, TX Sunday June 08 2008

Toyota Center, Houston, TX Monday June 09 2008

Shrine Auditorium, Los Angeles, CA Tuesday June 10 2008

St. Pete Times Forum, Tampa, FL Wednesday June 11 2008

Bank Atlantic Center, Fort Lauderdale, FL Friday June 13 2008

Gwinnett Center, Duluth, GA Sunday June 15 2008

Time Warner Cable Arena, Charlotte, NC Monday June 16 2008

Wolstein Center- CSU Convocation, Cleveland, OH Wednesday June 18 2008

Madison Square Garden, New York, NY 10001 Friday June 20 2008

Radio City Music Hall, New York, NY Saturday June 21 2008

The American audience will suffer with SAD (seasonal Affective Disorder)or will just be SAD as they will be bombarded with dross for about 3 hours.

NOW THAT IS SAD, a fully grown man wwearing lipstick and hairspray.

JUST STICK TO BEATING THE PIE EATING RECORD BOB

Wouldn't that be a Lunar Eclipse if it's his arse?

Wouldn't that be great if the Cure did a cover version of "Blue Monday"

Now he's promoting the Cure.

BTW I've hear that Cliff Richard is a big Cure fan. ;)

Does Bob's presence in the USA explain Britain's current warm weather, is he to blame for the normal dismal state of the UK's climate?

He's in love, cats.

See what I did there?

That was not worth £40 Col

Did The Cure do a gig in Cornwall in August 1999?

Perhaps it shouldn't be Shakin' Stevens that Bonnie Tyler should be duetting with on stage should she ever want to make a "comeback".....it should be fuckin Fatboy Smith!! Imagine the two of them together - so much hairspray and that there'd be a fuckin' hole in the ozone layer directly above them that follows them wherever they go.

The fans would have a whale of a time, drowning in a sea of teased-out hair and terrible 80s make up with at least 4 hours of overblown pretentious dross as the soundtrack..

:dead:

Well , Bonnie did sing Total Eclipse Of The Heart so maybe after Fat Bob's scoffed all his pies they could do a duet rejigged to be called Total Eclipse Of The Fart?

Turnaround, every now and then I get a little bit hungry when i'm never eating pies Turnaround, Every now and then I get a little bit tired of listening to the sound of my farts Turnaround, Every now and then I get a little bit nervous that the best of all the pies have been eat Turnaround, Every now and then I get a little bit terrified and then I see the pies in your eyes Turnaround Fat Bob, Every now and then I have a fart Turnaround Fat Bob, Every now and then I eat pies

Once upon a time I was falling in love But now I'm only doing a fart There's nothing I can do A total eclipse of the fart Once upon a time there was pies in my life But now there's only salad in the dark Nothing I can say A total eclipse of the fart

johnny wrote: Well , Bonnie did sing Total Eclipse Of The Heart so maybe after Fat Bob's scoffed all his pies they could do a duet rejigged to be called Total Eclipse Of The Fart?

Smithy has NO fuckin chance with getting his mitts on ANY pies if he duets with Bonnie Tyler.

Why's that, you may well ask?

Because that old fuckin caterwauling bitch would have hidden all of them out of sight - inside her humungous hair.....

Maybe they could form a POWER TRIO with that prancing preening ponce Mr Brandon Of Voluptuous Voice And Flowers and do the new theme tune for return of The Royle Family called "Totally Eclipse, My Arse!" and accompany it with a remix titled "Toenail Clippings Of Art" - and dedicate both songs to Ricky Tomlinson.......

:p