Tabsy's dating service....YOU could be the next lucky lady in my life!

Things have been a bit slow (read:nonexistent) on the local dating scene (read: me trying to avoid the jailbait I work with at the grocery store) so I thought I'd whore myself out online to any of the lovely females who frequent this site (read: I will playfully suggest we meet, but will chicken out at the last minute because it's in my nature). So ladies, want a crack at the ole Tabster? (sounds of crickets chirping).

In order to sweeten the pot, let's make this a quasi-dating Game extravaganza, in which the single guys who frequent this site (read: guys like me who sit around in their underwear watching reruns of MASH late at night and wondering why they just don't turn off the tv) express what they're looking for in a prospective female, and any female matching those attributes may or may not (read: restraining order) respond in kind. Whaddaya say?

I can't believe you haven't already been snapped up!

Surely things can't be that bad that you have to whore yourself online ? Don't they have farm animals in septic land ?

i like long walks on the beach, plan to have 2.5 kids and when i get married, i want my wedding dress to look just like the one jennifer aniston wore on her wedding. please call me at (432)123-2423. no creeps allowed.

Originally posted by Kevin Phillips Surely things can't be that bad that you have to whore yourself online ? Don't they have farm animals in septic land ?

You'd think they'd take my money, but....

I'm not seriously looking for love (That's what those pathetic dating service videos are for), I'm more looking for a good laugh. So here's my vital stats:

Age:22 Average salary: 2.5 million, no make that 2.5 billion per year Car: Ferrari....Xtreme? yeah, that's it, Ferrari Xtreme 2.0 or something House: doublewide trailer most enduring qualities: my bulging wallet What I bring to a relationship: a touch of class Hobbies: getting drunk and watching the sunrise through an alcoholic haze, racing expensive cars, shotting peasants, erm I mean pheasents. contact info: sexual-healer@yahoo.com or randy-mcnasty@hotmail.com

Classic TRASH on the FORUM.Reaching NEW lows.Well done but what is SHOTTING?:D SHUGZV will be first for a date mind! Do you eat HOT NOODLES..BAD BOY (BOMBAY) flavour cos in ENGLAND they say "HIT ME YOU SLAG" on the posters and i think you need a better class of chat up line. BROKEN TABOO or wot?

I tell ya what, let's just use this thread to bemoan our single status(those of you who are single).....actually, scratch that, it's not so bad. I mean, I can spend money on myslef whenever I want, eat wherever I please, not have to pay for somebody else when I go down to the local adult movies theater..... Never mind, thread closed, nothing to see here....

"IN THE END YOU MUST ADMIT IT'S GOT TO HURT A LITTLE BIT"

I can't shaft without someone else, this is certain....

Originally posted by Taboo # 7 I can't shaft without someone else, this is certain....

EXACTLY but the WORLD is your OYSTER?

Originally posted by Taboo # 7 Never mind, thread closed, nothing to see here....

close the thread? does that mean we can't lie about ourselves anymore?:(

by the way, my ideal date would be champaigne and a candle lit dinner at a french restaurant looking over the beach. of coarse we'll end off the date with a long walk on the beach.;)

Originally posted by snucker > Originally posted by Taboo # 7> Never mind, thread closed, nothing to see here....

close the thread? does that mean we can't lie about ourselves anymore?:(

by the way, my ideal date would be champaigne and a candle lit dinner at a french restaurant looking over the beach. of coarse we'll end off the date with a long walk on the beach.;)

Tempting, Snucker, but YOU'RE MUCH TOO YOUNG TO MESS AROUND WITH ME

Originally posted by Taboo # 7 Things have been a bit slow (read:nonexistent) on the local dating scene (read: me trying to avoid the jailbait I work with at the grocery store) so I thought I'd whore myself out online to any of the lovely females who frequent this site (read: I will playfully suggest we meet, but will chicken out at the last minute because it's in my nature). So ladies, want a crack at the ole Tabster? (sounds of crickets chirping).In order to sweeten the pot, let's make this a quasi-dating Game extravaganza, in which the single guys who frequent this site (read: guys like me who sit around in their underwear watching reruns of MASH late at night and wondering why they just don't turn off the tv) express what they're looking for in a prospective female, and any female matching those attributes may or may not (read: restraining order) respond in kind. Whaddaya say?

Renting 'n' Whoring' Sounds like a swell idea......could i be your Pimp' lol..lol You would be a valuable comoditty'

Dufford, FYI (or is it BYO, whatever!) You realise you've got three different Pimp Smiles to choose from?

Am 6' brunette with huge breasts and a tight little ass (like Kylie's). Can cook and I love house keeping. Have more money than I know what to do with. Love Depeche Mode.

oops, wrong thread...

Originally posted by flo Am 6' brunette with huge breasts and a tight little ass (like Kylie's). Can cook and I love house keeping. Have more money than I know what to do with. Love Depeche Mode.oops, wrong thread...

Hello WAYNETTA get me a PIZZA and some FAGS now! :D

what a superb idea. brown pizza and a pack of b&h