Go Baby GO!!!

We all know how the baby gets into the lady, but how do you get the little thing out?

Top three:

Curry Shag Stalingrad

Any more?

Put the bearer of said child in front of the telly while Blur play at Glastonbury 2009?

Prunes Orange Juice Pineapple Coffee Curries Walking up the stairs with weights Castor oil (bleurgh)

Paint mixer Washer on spin cycle Two screwdrivers and a monkey wrench Bungee jumping backwards Prunes

Depends.

If it's ripe, and as such, we can assume you'd like a living one, a green salad, made with lettuce, pea shoots and about 60g of AK47 or G13. A rounders catcher's mitten is a help. (or if it's my wee sister, just wait until she rings from hossy, then tell her how much fun, you, the father, and every one of her mates are having....she'll queefe the wee bugger out in milliseconds and head for the off license).

If it's not ripe, and you just want it out so the lady makes sense again, or because you are short of groundbait (mackerel is MUCH better than mashed baby, so it should be considered only in emergencies), then 1L methylated spirit administered either orally OR frontbottomally, should do the trick. Please be sure, and I cannot stress this enough, that the laydee is agreeable to this before proceeding (and check the weather, as once mashed, it keeps only about 36 hours, so if your day is rained off, your groundbait may spoil).

(sitting on The Orb's bass bins should cause a multi-orifice prolapse, which MIGHT get the little freeloader out).

Hmm. My light-hearted little thread seems to have turned into some sort of festival of bad weirdness.

Goooood.

Ginger cake - McVities worked for a friend of mine - a few slices wit a cup of tea, a few hours sleep & about 3 hours in the hospital - v-quick for a first baby

Doctor? wrote: Depends.

If it's ripe, and as such, we can assume you'd like a living one, a green salad, made with lettuce, pea shoots and about 60g of AK47 or G13. A rounders catcher's mitten is a help. (or if it's my wee sister, just wait until she rings from hossy, then tell her how much fun, you, the father, and every one of her mates are having....she'll queefe the wee bugger out in milliseconds and head for the off license).

If it's not ripe, and you just want it out so the lady makes sense again, or because you are short of groundbait (mackerel is MUCH better than mashed baby, so it should be considered only in emergencies), then 1L methylated spirit administered either orally OR frontbottomally, should do the trick. Please be sure, and I cannot stress this enough, that the laydee is agreeable to this before proceeding (and check the weather, as once mashed, it keeps only about 36 hours, so if your day is rained off, your groundbait may spoil).

(sitting on The Orb's bass bins should cause a multi-orifice prolapse, which MIGHT get the little freeloader out).

post of the year, you should be a consultant.