you are going to read a misery story about a girl from taiwan who has been a big new order fan for more than 10 years, but still haven't seen them thought she got three chances!!
i really don't know what i should say at this moment. this is the third time i bought tickets for new order and didn't make it to see them.
i was the first one in the queue, FIRST ONE! that may mean nothing but i was really excited about going to see barney and hooky. i bought the ticket to finsbury park which released as 511 three years ago, but for some reasons i had to cancel my plan. i still got the ticket in the dvd's box now. and then, this summer, i tried to buy the ticket of get loaded in the park. when i was in the HMV store, the staff told me i can't buy it in their store, must go to the park and buy it there. she said there should be some left. but when i got to the park it was so out!!! so i had to buy it from the ticket dealer outside. thank god he knew i'm from asia and gave me a "student discount." HOWEVER, hooky never showed up.
and finally LAST NIGHT, i was in the arc club alone. i was in the same town with them, maybe the same venue. ( at that time, the original lyrics version of "LET'S GO" was kept playing on my mind- " waiting for so long oh I've been waiting for a chance to see you. waiting for so long oh I've been waiting for so long!!!" SEE??? i am such a devoted fan!!!) maybe it was beacuse of that glass of champign, i don't know. ( it may be hard for you to believe but i hardly have alcohol drinks 1/3 bottle of smirnoff ice is enough to make me drunk.) i felt a bit cold and thought the tiny glass of champign won't hurt, so i finished that champign (in 40 minutes). an hour later i passed the f**k out, for the first time of my life!!!
i was the first one in the queue and i got the best spot! however before they came out i passed out and was handed out by two security guards! i felt so bad and cried on the bench by the beach alone. it was so darn cold and i couldn't stop shivering. i bought hot chocolate and a sandwhich but it was useless. still i felt so cold and couldn't even walk straightly.
so i have to walk back to the hotel, which i didn't know how i managed to do that. i threw up and felt so much better after that. it was about 20 past 12 and i tried to wake up at one then walk to the club again. i might be exhausted. i didn't heard the alarm at all. when i woke up it was already 2:30. the show ends at three, and it took me about 20 minutes to walk to the venue. so i rushed out. but the wind's so cold when it blew my head was like going to explode, and i still couldn't walk straightly- this is my first time getting drunk as well and just because of that champign! laugh at me! i remembered telling one of the security i shouldn't have had that champign. ( i also told her i was here for new order. felt so stupid at after telling her so) anyways i just fell down on my bed, weeping til i fell asleep again.
Therefore, i didn't see barney nor hooky after all. i was so mad at myself. what have i done to deserve this? I AM NO. ONE NEW ORDER FAN IN TAIWAN! i came all the way, studying here just because i bet they will release their album in 2005, and i own every record they release (well, in taiwan- now i try to collect rest of them on ebay. i already got a lot from japan though.) i know every single song they sing and why i miss the chance of seeing them again and again??? i am a quiet person. i don't go to clubs often unless for the gigs, and i wouldn't even shout out "barney i love you" if i see him on stage. ( well i guess so) i CANNOT accept the truth that i passed out because of the champign but not him!!!
this is definitely the worst thing ever happened to me. everyone on the street hug and kissed their friends for the coming new year, and i could only sit there alone and bite that sandwhich. what a lousy end of 2004, and what a lousy start for the new year!
i already got back in nottingham and feel so much better now. it's just that i still can't forgive myself. now i don't even know if i will ever have a chance to see them since something always happens before i could do so.
if you read here, thank you very much. i know my english's awkward so thanks for your patient. please please say something nice to me. i DO need some comfort now.
ps. i met a guy who's second of the queue. sorry i forgot his name after passing out. but just would like to know how the dj set was and if he managed to see them pretty closely.