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schlong

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tit-for-tat: who's got the best cock on NOOL?

no avian jokes please.

:hat:

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It's Friday night, innit?

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I think Martin probably does, but I've never seen him with his pants down. At least you can see his tits.

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bLuE oRdEr wrote: It's Friday night, innit?

it's ladies night, oh what a night.

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AgentWood wrote:

bLuE oRdEr wrote: It's Friday night, innit?

it's ladies night, oh what a night.

[Oh what a night]

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bLuE oRdEr wrote:

AgentWood wrote:

bLuE oRdEr wrote: It's Friday night, innit?

it's ladies night, oh what a night.

[Oh what a night]

indeed...

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Is the feelin' right?

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bLuE oRdEr wrote: Is the feelin' right?

get down on it!

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I'm tryin', sophisticated mama, I'm tryin'!

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you'd better try: 'cause it's fresh, exciting. it's so inviting to me.

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Careful Miss Frisky Lady...Conversation will be going 'round, people talking 'bout the girl who's come to town

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AgentWood wrote: tit-for-tat: who's got the best cock on NOOL?

no avian jokes please.

:hat:

Rocket Mick - no contest!

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NObabe wrote:

AgentWood wrote: tit-for-tat: who's got the best cock on NOOL?

no avian jokes please.

:hat:

Rocket Mick - no contest!

You haven't seen mine yet :D

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I'm hung like a sparrow...oh yeah! :wtf:

Here's a quick and easy suggestion to see if your schlong is long: get out a tape measure or a ruler of some kind, and measure how long it is before you realize that you've just been dupped into measuring your own pathetic excuse for a penis! Oodles of fun! :thumb:

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Rian wrote:

NObabe wrote:

AgentWood wrote: tit-for-tat: who's got the best cock on NOOL?

no avian jokes please.

:hat:

Rocket Mick - no contest!

You haven't seen mine yet :D

c'mon. you must have a digital camera.

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Taboo # 7 wrote: I'm hung like a sparrow...oh yeah! :wtf:

Here's a quick and easy suggestion to see if your schlong is long: get out a tape measure or a ruler of some kind, and measure how long it is before you realize that you've just been dupped into measuring your own pathetic excuse for a penis! Oodles of fun! :thumb:

Don't forget the width as well...

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craig's digitalwaters wrote:

Taboo # 7 wrote: I'm hung like a sparrow...oh yeah! :wtf:

Here's a quick and easy suggestion to see if your schlong is long: get out a tape measure or a ruler of some kind, and measure how long it is before you realize that you've just been dupped into measuring your own pathetic excuse for a penis! Oodles of fun! :thumb:

Don't forget the width as well...

Is that the comment of a connoisseur?

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Bigus Dickus reckons both GIRTHF and WENGTHF are lauded in Wome..

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AgentWood wrote: tit-for-tat: who's got the best cock on NOOL?

no avian jokes please.

:hat:

so what makes the "best" cock...?

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Rian wrote:

NObabe wrote:

AgentWood wrote: tit-for-tat: who's got the best cock on NOOL?

no avian jokes please.

:hat:

Rocket Mick - no contest!

You haven't seen mine yet :D

Use your digital camera and post them here!

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AgentWood wrote:

Rian wrote:

NObabe wrote:

AgentWood wrote: tit-for-tat: who's got the best cock on NOOL?

no avian jokes please.

:hat:

Rocket Mick - no contest!

You haven't seen mine yet :D

c'mon. you must have a digital camera.

of course. why?

oh. you want a pic of it?

can't do that, there are children here.....

:love2:

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Rian wrote:

can't do that, there are children here.....

Name them :)

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pumped full of drugs wrote:

AgentWood wrote: tit-for-tat: who's got the best cock on NOOL?

no avian jokes please.

:hat:

so what makes the "best" cock...?

One that all the hens dig, and get damp-ons for:thumb:

Note: Cock=Rooster.. if you don't speak propers Ingerlish

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Boatraceface wrote:

pumped full of drugs wrote:

AgentWood wrote: tit-for-tat: who's got the best cock on NOOL?

no avian jokes please.

:hat:

so what makes the "best" cock...?

One that all the hens dig, and get damp-ons for:thumb:

That would be mine then.

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Hens not sheep:brow: :evil4:

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:rofl:

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Boatraceface wrote: Hens not sheep:brow: :evil4:

:nono: Don't let Trev hear you, it would break his heart.

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My mate Donkey Dave's cock is so long,he actually snorts his own loads, to save on tissue..I don't condone it,I deplore cum snorters,its a disgusting pursuit in my opinion.It sets a bad example :nuts:

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bLuE oRdEr wrote:

Boatraceface wrote: Hens not sheep:brow: :evil4:

:nono: Don't let Trev hear you, it would break his heart.

He will have got the flock out of here:crazy:

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Boatraceface wrote:

bLuE oRdEr wrote:

Boatraceface wrote: Hens not sheep:brow: :evil4:

:nono: Don't let Trev hear you, it would break his heart.

He will have got the flock out of here:crazy:

Surely you can't be serious...

I am. And don't call me Shirley...:p

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:rofl:

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Now the most popular thread on NOOL...And the ladies have yet to weigh in. :ignore:

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In the past 3 days the most popular topic in the forums has been "schlong"..Proves cocks never go out of fashion... bet your donger on it..

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bLuE oRdEr wrote: Now the most popular thread on NOOL...And the ladies have yet to weigh in. :ignore:

Too Vulgar?

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Boatraceface wrote:

bLuE oRdEr wrote: Now the most popular thread on NOOL...And the ladies have yet to weigh in. :ignore:

Too Vulgar?

:shrug: All I know is, it's the most popular thread, but it's all guys posting. Not that we're obssessed with schlongs. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

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What could be wrong in a schlong?:laugh:

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I bet my schlong could take your schlong in a fair fight!

Right, you have insulted my honor, sir! We shall duel on this point!

Schlongs at dawn, it is!

Maybe I should go to bed :nervous:

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Boatraceface wrote: What could be wrong in a schlong?:laugh:

Nothing, I reckon. We men all seem to be pretty pleased to have one. :D

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Taboo # 7 wrote: I bet my schlong could take your schlong in a fair fight!

Right, you have insulted my honor, sir! We shall duel on this point!

Schlongs at dawn, it is!

Maybe I should go to bed :nervous:

My schlong ain't going anywhere near your schlong.

Maybe you should go to bed. With a, you know, woman. The kind without an air valve. :evil4:

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It's not schlong. It's Schwanz!

Nämlich, wer hat der beste Schwanz?

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It would'nt be a fair fight,you don't beshlong in Dongsville... go with your pee tail tucked between your legs :laugh: Edit:in Response to Tabbsy's attempt to cross pork with me:dead:

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bLuE oRdEr wrote: Now the most popular thread on NOOL...And the ladies have yet to weigh in. :ignore:

Considering that there are about 3 other ladies aside from Agent Wood on NOOL, I'm not surprised it's mostly guys posting on this thread.

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bLuE oRdEr wrote:

Boatraceface wrote: What could be wrong in a schlong?:laugh:

Nothing, I reckon. We men all seem to be pretty pleased to have one. :D

One of my bosses, years ago, had a cartoon on the wall in his office--it would probably be illegal today-- but it went like this (bear with me, it's been a long time since I've seen it, so I may have some of the details off):

A little boy and a little girl are comparing themselves...

Little Boy: "I have a marble."

Little Girl: "I have two marbles."

Little Boy: "Well, I have a tricycle."

Little Girl: "I have a bicycle with training wheels."

Little Boy: (pointing to his schlong) "Well, I have one of these; do you?"

Little Girl: "No, I don't have one of those, but with one of these (pointing to her own "equipment"), I can have as many of those as I want."

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It's not schlong. It's [orange]Schwanz[/orange]!

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And she grew up to be Courtney Love,commanding zero respect:crazy:

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|| | ||| 6217|| 8 || 3 wrote: It's not schlong. It's [orange]Schwanz[/orange]!

Its not

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Boatraceface wrote:

|| | ||| 6217|| 8 || 3 wrote: It's not schlong. It's [orange]Schwanz[/orange]!

Its not

Please... don't freaking start me to study German again...

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I see your schwartz is as big as mine

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Server Error in "/" Application wrote:

I see your schwartz is as big as mine

Mein Schwanz ist nicht schwarz :skeptic:

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This blue-eyed boy that wants to be wrote:

bLuE oRdEr wrote: Now the most popular thread on NOOL...And the ladies have yet to weigh in. :ignore:

Considering that there are about 3 other ladies aside from Agent Wood on NOOL, I'm not surprised it's mostly guys posting on this thread.

Speaking of drunken hussies, where are those girls?

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I have big hands and feet =o

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Tristan Jayol wrote: I have big hands and feet =o

Pity the rest of you doesn't measure up. :evil4:

No, but seriously girls, you can't tell anything by the size of a man's feet. Or hands, apparently. Or height. It's all misinformation that teenage girls who are not in the know pass around.

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Blue, have you received your new bottle of Viagara yet? :D

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Nah, still waiting for my Rogaine. Hair loss-- now there's a clue, ladies-- it comes from an overabundance of testosterone. :deal:

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One's big nose hints at one's big schwanz.

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More urban myth.

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This guy!!

Weh Hey! :jawdrop:

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|| | ||| 6217|| 8 || 3 wrote:

Rian wrote:

can't do that, there are children here.....

Name them :)

Amanda, Adrian, Samuel. That's my kids.

Hugo, Emil, Rasmus. That's my friends kids.

We had a little party last night, so no such pics.

Were did I put my digital camera.... :scratch:

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well...all I can say is that mine has never failed to please...

well...I always get mine...can't say the same for my lady friends!!! hope they bring their toys :evil4:

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Boatraceface wrote: My mate Donkey Dave's cock is so long,he actually snorts his own loads, to save on tissue..I don't condone it,I deplore cum snorters,its a disgusting pursuit in my opinion.It sets a bad example :nuts:

:barf::dead:

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Tristan Jayol wrote: I have big hands and feet =o

|| | ||| 6217|| 8 || 3 wrote: One's big nose hints at one's big schwanz.

Myths passed around by virgins. Ladies, here's the real truth about schlong. A man's equipment grows throughout his life. Have you ever noticed a baby boy? He's got a wee little package. By the time he enters puberty, that wee little package has begun to grow into a manly member. A young-man's member, but a manly member nonetheless. He continues to add girth and length throughout his life, so that when he's in his twenties he's more, erm, "manly" than he was in his teens, when he's in his thirties, he's more studly than when he was in his twenties, and when he's in his forties, he's quite well hung. By the time he's nearing his prime (i.e., as he's entering his fifties), he's hung like a bull elephant.

It's true; don't just take my word for it-- ask the guys. Ask Trev or Popesy if they're more well-hung than the teenage boys. Ask Boatraceface or Barney Army if they're more well-hung than the twenty-somethings. Ask Diggy or Twist if they're more well-hung than the thirty-somethings.

And that's the truth about schlong. :smoking:

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I`ve never had any complaints.

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bLuE oRdEr wrote: as he's entering his fifties), he's hung like a bull elephant.

if it makes you feel better about yourself go ahead and think that, dear. :p

note: lots of posts from men, but no photos yet. i think you are all chicken.

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:rofl:

I'm just sayin'.

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And 'bout time one of you drunken hussies showed up; this thread's been a little cock-heavy.

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Show me yours and i`ll show you mine.

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bLuE oRdEr wrote: this thread's been a little cock-heavy.

prove it.

and johnny: you first!

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Johnny wrote: I`ve never had any complaints.

Oh yeah?

NObabe wrote: Has got a small penis!

Beat that! :evil4:

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:nono: No beating!

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AgentWood wrote:

bLuE oRdEr wrote: this thread's been a little cock-heavy.

prove it.

and johnny: you first!

here you go then..

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Over Here its called a 'langer' - at least in the County Cork area. Which explains why so many Irish (& mainly Corkies) went to America - think of Bernhart Langer - in America they pronounce him Bernard Longer - so, if in america your langer becomes longer - then that's the place to be!:D

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Johnny wrote:

AgentWood wrote:

bLuE oRdEr wrote: this thread's been a little cock-heavy.

prove it.

and johnny: you first!

here you go then..

all i see is a box with the word 'image' inside of it. :scratch:

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AgentWood wrote:

Johnny wrote:

AgentWood wrote:

bLuE oRdEr wrote: this thread's been a little cock-heavy.

prove it.

and johnny: you first!

here you go then..

all i see is a box with the word 'image' inside of it. :scratch:

i suck at the internet:evil4:

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Trying to hide something, my friend?

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AgentWood wrote:

bLuE oRdEr wrote: this thread's been a little cock-heavy.

prove it.

You want to see some dick? OK, you're on....

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Here's more:

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The biggest one of them all

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Christopher Owens wrote: The biggest cock of them all

I beg to differ....

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Do you like Kerry King?

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one girl said mine looks like a baby's arm.

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Johnny wrote:

AgentWood wrote:

Johnny wrote:

AgentWood wrote:

bLuE oRdEr wrote: this thread's been a little cock-heavy.

prove it.

and johnny: you first!

here you go then..

all i see is a box with the word 'image' inside of it. :scratch:

i suck at the internet:evil4:

Where have I heard that before?

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john kershaw wrote: one girl said mine looks like a baby's arm.

Was that Jerremy Beadle's arm as a baby?:p

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modesty prevents me from going on

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