Ask Steve

Since it's been as exciting as a wake around here these last few days now that no one's allowed to be too friendly any more.

I thought I'd offer my services as resident smart-arse. I've wasted my life collecting shiploads of pointless knowledge, that I'm always willing to share.

Ask a serious question, I will attempt a serious answer. Ask a silly question I will attempt a silly answer. Ask a rude question I'll chuck the toys, spit the dummy and wont come out to play any more.

(PS, I offer no promise of any kind that serious answers will not be forthcoming to silly questions and vice versa).

Obviously anything I CANNOT answer will have to go in MICK's inbox :D

well i too know a little about just about everything, in some subjects and in others, probably too much.

cambo what exactly are your fields of expertise?

we know your are knowledgeable about computers and formula one, but give us some guidance so we can ask you some specific questions.

Gadgetry, music and popular science, but I know a teeny bit about most things.

Cambo, I've heard rumours that the Assembly is to be reinstated, with Chuck Norris and Mr. T in it. Would this work?

how does the tardis work? and why can the doctor never quite fix it?

is 19.30 too early to start enjoying a few glasses of re?

Christopher Owens wrote: Cambo, I've heard rumours that the Assembly is to be reinstated, with Chuck Norris and Mr. T in it. Would this work?

Yes, i believe that would represent a genuine way forward to the people of NI....Mr paisley would stand up to utter some shite or other and be bitch slapped down with the phrase "shaddup foo" and Gerry wouldn't even get to finish "but sein fein ISN'T the IRA" before receiving a much needed roundhouse kick to the head.

Ronald Kirsch wrote: how does the tardis work? and why can the doctor never quite fix it?

The how it works would be beyond your ape descended intellect, but a for why it DOESN'T work.

The Type 40 had been obselete for an age when the Dr found his in the breaker's yard, a former science vessel (had it been a personal capsule it would have gone off to the tardis graveyard at the end of time when it's owner died). The type 40 is also designed to operated by SIX timelords, hence the hexagonal console.

Ronald Kirsch wrote: is 19.30 too early to start enjoying a few glasses of re?

no as long as you intend to get drunk.

This "few glasses each and every day" is an alco trait....whereas getting shitefaced a coupla times a week is healthy.

Steve Campbell wrote:

Ronald Kirsch wrote: how does the tardis work? and why can the doctor never quite fix it?

The how it works would be beyond your ape descended intellect, but a for why it DOESN'T work.

The Type 40 had been obselete for an age when the Dr found his in the breaker's yard, a former science vessel (had it been a personal capsule it would have gone off to the tardis graveyard at the end of time when it's owner died). The type 40 is also designed to operated by SIX timelords, hence the hexagonal console.

this sounds a lot like divine mystery. ie only time lords know how it works. :D

Not at all, it's just a long and geeky explanation ;)

mind you, if you doubt in the validity of divine mystery, ask a MS employee how windows works.

Steve Campbell wrote: Not at all, it's just a long and geeky explanation ;)

mind you, if you doubt in the validity of divine mystery, ask a MS employee how windows works.

go on try long and geeky on me.

it's all to do with a collapsed star and made up sorts of energy, and that's all you're getting :D (your race is not ready for this knowledge)

Are NO gonna play Athens in June?

Steve Campbell wrote: it's all to do with a collapsed star and made up sorts of energy, and that's all you're getting :D (your race is not ready for this knowledge)

just in case i come across one of these collapsed stars tomorrow, and decide to utilise it by building a time machine, right. :D

I am afraid that falls beyond the scope of this article, but thank you for your interest in this thread madam.

What is an oryx and can you suggest a use for one...

Snorri xxx

Steve Campbell wrote:

mind you, if you doubt in the validity of divine mystery, ask a MS employee how windows works.

You're talking Windows Vista I take it? Ask them why its so f'ing late more like it!

Second opinions are worth seeking so how about a panel effort Mr C?!

Snorrimon wrote: What is an oryx and can you suggest a use for one...

Snorri xxx

It is a type of deer or antelope and it's greatest use would be as a mobile larder for big cats.

Steve Lea wrote:

Steve Campbell wrote:

mind you, if you doubt in the validity of divine mystery, ask a MS employee how windows works.

You're talking Windows Vista I take it? Ask them why its so f'ing late more like it!

Second opinions are worth seeking so how about a panel effort Mr C?!

Be my guest Mr L.

Vista's install media=2GB+ LOL

Actually I've fookin got a question for you Campbell

Why after installing 'Grand Prix Legends' is my laptop completely fucked

Luckily I have another admin account on it so I can try and repair without a re-install.

Ah well, at least I like a challenge

Steve Campbell wrote:

Snorrimon wrote: What is an oryx and can you suggest a use for one...

Snorri xxx

It is a type of deer or antelope and it's greatest use would be as a mobile larder for big cats.

Oryx are generally found in semi desert environments like the Kalahari down here, so they wouldnt run into lions too often. They have the longest straightest horns you ever did see though and are completely f'ing lethal in a fight!

No idea, it's a very passive and friendly app in general.

Wont run on XP on a fast cpu unpatched but it really shouldn't even touch your system files.

It only installs 2 system files if memory serves, papycpu.sys and papyjoy.sys, neither is required and can be removed and deregistered if you really need to.

http://www.simracers.co.uk/gpl/ultimategpllinks/gpl_ultimatelinks.htm

EDIT Hmmmmm half the links there are down...FFS, still it tells ye what ya need :D

probably a coincendence

why is it sometimes my cupeths decideths to runneth over?? my tops won't fit half of the month

also, why is it that everytime i get measured for proper cupeths that they are always not swollen?

ChrissMari wrote: why is it sometimes my cupeths decideths to runneth over?? my tops won't fit half of the month

also, why is it that everytime i get measured for proper cupeths that they are always not swollen?

1. That would be down to your natural rhythms dear girl.
2. as to why u never get measured at the right time, well maybe that's cos at the right time you don;t feel like shopping?

Steve Campbell wrote:

ChrissMari wrote: why is it sometimes my cupeths decideths to runneth over?? my tops won't fit half of the month

also, why is it that everytime i get measured for proper cupeths that they are always not swollen?

1. That would be down to your natural rhythms dear girl.
2. as to why u never get measured at the right time, well maybe that's cos at the right time you don;t feel like shopping?

How do you make yorkshire puddings?

Bonzette wrote:

Steve Campbell wrote:

ChrissMari wrote: why is it sometimes my cupeths decideths to runneth over?? my tops won't fit half of the month

also, why is it that everytime i get measured for proper cupeths that they are always not swollen?

1. That would be down to your natural rhythms dear girl.
2. as to why u never get measured at the right time, well maybe that's cos at the right time you don;t feel like shopping?

How do you make yorkshire puddings?

Is this another veiled breast reference, this time, one too far over my head?

If not, you drop some pancake batter (ish) into some bun trays with pre-super-heated oil in em, and fuck it all back in the oven. Next!

Hey now, what you doing?

Snorri xxx