Stupid things "brits" do :shrug:

Al Jarvis wrote: What the fcuk is a 'Brit'?!

I think the only true Brits are Cambo's lot in Norn Iron, but to get it phonetically correct you have to pronounce them as 'Briddish'. Not British.

as long as you lot promise not to say 'miTchigan' for michigan or 'merry-LAND' for maryland. it's not eng-LAND or scot-LAND now, is it?

and we'll do our best with southwark and edinburgh. really.

Steve Campbell wrote:

EDIT...CM comes from a place where ppl say "she's from Britain in England" and mean it, she can't help it :D

speak for yesself, m8 :)

Steve Campbell wrote:

70+% of american teens think Chernobyl is Cher's real name.

oh yeah! then what is Cher short for?

Cherilyn, according to imdb.com

Smarra[gold]dona wrote:

Steve Campbell wrote:

70+% of american teens think Chernobyl is Cher's real name.

oh yeah! then what is Cher short for?

Short for Shergar,the stolen champion racehorse..You can still see the horse-like features despite the surgery.I'd know that horse anywhere Cher and Cher alike.then again,ney

Al Jarvis wrote:

(I just had to use the 'Dog' suffix there cos I'm a good Cafflick boy meself! Well, slightly lapsed, obviously.)

ummmm, same 'ere. And the same for all my NO mates.

and seeing Celtic have a far bigger following than Rangers on these boards is there anything in this?

I mean Barneys lyrics do tend to involve guillt/regret. Which is about all I picked up from Cafflick indoctrination

Guilt's a hun thing...when you (ahem) "sin", you fookers get to confess it and yer all sorted, we're taught to carry it round our whole lives and prepare to be roasted for it :D

take it from me tho, prods can't party...i come from a race of anal morons....Bangor..orange as a satsuma....like living under Cromwell...Belfast ...50-50 council....pubs open all night and parties in the streets.

Lapsed left footer over here aswell,very lapsed...Catholics are far too big on guilt for my tastes.

Al Jarvis wrote:

Boatraceface wrote: Lapsed left footer over here aswell,very lapsed...Catholics are far too big on guilt for my tastes.

Does being Lapsed Cafflicks mean we're now Protestants?

I mean, they're not proper Christians really, are they?

That's the nicest thing you've ever said :D

Daft to some,but whenever Protestant is said,I always picture placard wielding ants..They are just King Henry VIII's whim so he could get knacker-deep time and again ar'nt they?I mean dumbfuckestants or what

Religious Zealot corrections on a postcard please

Steve Campbell wrote:

ChrissMari wrote:

Steve Campbell wrote: PS

I suspect this may be one of the very few genuine reasons to equate "brit" and English. I doubt any Scot, Welshman or psuedoboghopper would each a Xmas decoration.

I hate the word brit hence the quotes

See it's like this...let us take an example of something I'm very familliar with.......F1

Irvine twats 5 cars and causes a restart "a terrible error from the young ulsterman"

He wins "and British driver Eddie irvine scores a fine win"

David coulthard, loses, he's Scots....he wins, he's British.....these English broadcasters are a crafty lot.

When Scotsmen Sandy Lyle won The Open in 1985 and Paul Lawrie in 1999 they became British but now they're often both shooting rounds of 75+ and failing to qualify for tournaments, they are Scots again but Nick Faldo has always remained English!

I could go on for hours but I'll only become bitter and twisted and spoil what is a beautiful sunny day...

Super Ally wrote:

When Scotsmen Sandy Lyle won The Open in 1985 and Paul Lawrie in 1999 they became British but now they're often both shooting rounds of 75+ and failing to qualify for tournaments, they are Scots again but Nick Faldo has always remained English!

I could go on for hours but I'll only become bitter and twisted and spoil what is a beautiful sunny day...

to make you more bitter: in the 2002 winter olympics when the men's curling team (all scots) were doing well they were british. when they finally lost, the BBC chocked it up to that scottish team!

of course the women, who won the gold, were always british in the eyes of auntie.

Officially NI don;t exist in the olympics, as it's a GB team not a UK one.

Although until kneecapping and joyriding become Olympic events it's no loss to the nation.

EDIT: it must be bad when yanks can spot it a mile off, not just us paranoid provincials :D

Boring bit, read only if tragicly bored.......

A more serious issue was the FIA classifying Eddie irvine as Irish the first time he got on the podium, his parents house was attacked and all. Their plan seemed to be to call him Irish to balance out his entry registration as GB LOL. He actually told them to forget all of it an stick a shamrock flag up and play some silly pop song ( I can't remember which), but they was having none of it.

Steve Campbell wrote: EDIT: it must be bad when yanks can spot it a mile off, not just us paranoid provincials :D

i lived amongst the 'paranoid provincials' for 4 years, cambo. i studied their habits well (especially their mating habits, but that's a different story).

AgentWood wrote:

Steve Campbell wrote: EDIT: it must be bad when yanks can spot it a mile off, not just us paranoid provincials :D

i lived amongst the 'paranoid provincials' for 4 years, cambo. i studied their habits well (especially their mating habits, but that's a different story).

ROFLMAO....had a pile of stenchy socks in yer room then did ya Woodsy?

PS I bet your travels in and out f the country have a perceptible effect on the national average IQ :D

I got a bollocking off US immigration for writing "England" as my country of origin on the green form. I should have put "UK".

So I must be UKish, not English...

Old Blue wrote: I got a bollocking off US immigration for writing "England" as my country of origin on the green form. I should have put "UK".

So I must be UKish, not English...

it may seem absurd to you as you feel english not british, but since the united kingdom is the official name of the country that's the name immigration requires on its forms.

americans put USA but are not USAish. same thing. nor can we put the name of our state on the form--and some americans feel more 'patriotic' towards their state than their country. like me with colorado (all hail to the beautiful and bountiful centennial state). *prostrates*

AgentWood wrote:

Old Blue wrote: I got a bollocking off US immigration for writing "England" as my country of origin on the green form. I should have put "UK".

So I must be UKish, not English...

it may seem absurd to you as you feel english not british, but since the united kingdom is the official name of the country that's the name immigration requires on its forms.

americans put USA but are not USAish. same thing. nor can we put the name of our state on the form--and some americans feel more 'patriotic' towards their state than their country. like me with colorado (all hail to the beautiful and bountiful centennial state). *prostrates*

We are USian ;) or United Statesian

ChrissMari wrote:

AgentWood wrote:

Old Blue wrote: I got a bollocking off US immigration for writing "England" as my country of origin on the green form. I should have put "UK".

So I must be UKish, not English...

it may seem absurd to you as you feel english not british, but since the united kingdom is the official name of the country that's the name immigration requires on its forms.

americans put USA but are not USAish. same thing. nor can we put the name of our state on the form--and some americans feel more 'patriotic' towards their state than their country. like me with colorado (all hail to the beautiful and bountiful centennial state). *prostrates*

We are USian ;) or United Statesian

okay....

Al Jarvis wrote: Who, these days, give a fcuk about the Union? Bar the Far Right, of course?

3rd unshakable mental image of the day.... Her Maj as a Nashnal frunt fug. LOL

Is England not a country, then?

Old Blue wrote: Is England not a country, then?

not in international law, you have no national Govt for one thing.....we had one of those, but they just called each other names until you lot took over again LOL

Then when we call ourselves "American" the rest of North America gets their panties in a twist. Out of South America we are called Norte Americanos.

I think the stupidest item "brits" do is give up their own culture. Seriously, NFL Europe? do they even watch it? English Italian food? Where is the little Sicily in Manchester? Go into a pub and buy a pint of Budweiser, bleck:dead:? Keep up the monarchy so US tourists can fawn over "the good ol' days" of empire?:knight:

Stupidest thing Americans do, believe the rest of the world needs help. I am talking about everyday Americans not just Bushies. Oh and by the way, at least our president is in office no more than 8 years (except for the Socialist Roosevelt). Unfortunately we (the people)are creating a class system headed by Democrats and Republicans that keep in office by developing a socialist system, again back to Roosevelt. I think of it like the cliques in hign school. Always some group trying to assert their perceived superiority over another group, kind of like Leninism.

the smartest thing the english could do is burn down stamford bridge.

Following George Bush and eating McShit are quite stupid :D

Binocher wrote: Following George Bush and eating McShit are quite stupid :D

it's a good thing i don't follow george bush then, isn't it? ;)

AgentWood wrote:

Binocher wrote: Following George Bush and eating McShit are quite stupid :D

it's a good thing i don't follow george bush then, isn't it? ;)

Cuban food for you with talk like that young lady !! :D

Oh I actually thought of a good one...hold a lawn tennis tournament in England in "summer".

(the daftness of this is of course dwarfed by their believing Tim Henman might not get spanked by a 16 yrold in the first round)