Worst movie ever!!!!! (o/t) — Forum Archive

7 May 2002, 12:56

Originally posted by Kimberly Raymond-Jensen > Originally posted by CandyTheBear> > > > Originally posted by depthcharge> > I thought Police Academy 5: Assignment Miami Beach was a pile of crap. They really fucked up an excellent series with that stinker.> > > > > > :\pimp2:> > >

Oh so true - but realistically, how could they possibly follow up the cinematic tour de force of "Police Academy 4 - Citizens on Patrol", surely an Eisenstein-esque thinkpiece reminiscent of Battleship Potempkin?

Also a huge thumbs down for my personal all-time stinkers: Boxing Helena, AI - Artificial Intelligence, Eyes Wide Shut, Starship Troopers and Jurassic Park - The Lost World. Putrid, the lot of 'em. CTB :cool:

Candy, Starship Troopers ruled! It had horrible acting, big ugly bugs and not much plot, how can you not like it? :lol: ! Really, I am embarrassed to say that I have seen this movie, but Waterworld sucked ass, and I don't like Kevin Costner :\puke: I love Starship Troopers for it's ultimate cheesiness!

You've got good taste in bad movies, Kimberley. Waterworld was absolutely, completely, unquestionably ~~pig bollocks~~ RANCID

7 May 2002, 14:37

Just about anything with Chuck "I can emote only constipation" Norris, but especially Invasion USA. So true-to-life, it's scary.....okay, it's not, it's awful.

Chuck Norris....:headoff:

7 May 2002, 15:00

Originally posted by Oh Shite! There Goes The Paranoid Android Again!! Worst movie ever?Absolutely ANYTHING with Robin Williams in it.

Talentless, irritating, flappy-gobbed, shitehawk c***.

:headoff: :headoff: :headoff: :headoff:

Definitely agreed on that; truly a Jack Lemmon for his time.

7 May 2002, 15:07

UP:

Starship Troopers. though Roughnecks: the Starship Troopers Chronicles is A THOUSAND PERCENT better. everything a completely CGI animated series should be, and more. and more true to the novel. though really, both are true to *bits* of the novel...and in both, Diz is a woman when originally Diz was a bit chara mentioned in ONE PARAGRAPH and was actually a MAN. but that's neither here nor there. ;) taken humourously, this movie is indeed entertaining. despite the 90210-ishness of most of the cast. and Denise Richards. can't see what the hell anyone sees in that bint, either. :confused:

DOWN:

agreed on anything to do with Robin Williams and Chuck Norris. :violent: and will raise you a few more absolutely terrible films: Slacker (why Richard Linklater has a career at all is BEYOND ME... :nonono: ), The Minus Man (granted, most movies involving Janeane Garofalo, much as i do :love: her, are usually crap...but THIS takes the CAKE! or the piss, perhaps. ;) ), Playing God (there are maybe FOUR amusing moments in the whole movie, and all involve the psychotic blonde guy who's not Tim Robbins whose name escapes me right now! :nonono: ), and Star Wars. Episode One: The Phantom Menace. ack. where do i begin? :skeptic: .

TURN AROUND:

firstly, let me say that i do indeed love David Lynch and most things he's done with all my heart. in case i hadn't already made that clear, which i probably haven't here. but WHY was it that Wild at Heart is the thing of his that got the most acclaim? :eek: eeeee! terrible for a million reasons, and the book isn't really any better! :nonono: the only good thing about it is the Wizard of Oz twisting, but that's IT.

The Ice Storm. bleuuuuuurgh! another one to make me stick sporks in my eyes, and of course full of unbelievable amounts of critical acclaim. :nonono: and Ang Lee is another case of unbelievable overhype...though i will love The Wedding Banquet forever and ever and ever...

again, all my opinion... :angel2:

7 May 2002, 15:19

i like the ice storm! it's very similar to american beauty, but i really liked it! it's a nice dark movie about dysfunctional families and i guess i really like those. plus, it has toby maguire, and he's a pretty cool actor (mind you, it's the only toby maguire movie i've seen. there's no way i'm gonna see that spider man dreck)

8 May 2002, 06:27

Originally posted by CandyTheBear You might have earned one yerself from me if you'd chosen a better footy team to support. ;)Now when are you coming to Melbourne for a ?CTB

You'd better start :love: -ing the Hawks, RandyBear. We're going to be flying the flag for Vic this year the way things are going.

About that :beer: ...

I actually showed up at the museum the other day looking for you. I went to the help desk and enquired.

"I'm looking for a bearish, brainiac-type who's heavily into the internet, obscure music and Star Wars.. Possibly answers to the handle Candy and is known to favour a Hawaiin shirt on the weekend. Can you help me out?"

Unfortunately I was advised that that description was fairly popular amongst staff and that I'd need to be more specific. Drats.

But seriously my long-suffering Moorabin mate.. Dust off your finest pint glasses, give the Bearess a leave pass and slip Technique into the carousel because it ain't that far away.

:\pimp2:

8 May 2002, 06:41

But giving Tabsy his thread back, I must add Breakdance 2 Electric Boogaloo to his wretched list. After the exhilarating body-poppin majesty of the first, the follow-up was, sadly, rather wack.

A disillusioned, mini-depthcharge almost traded in his white shelltoes and took his cardboard home after viewing that dud.

:\pimp2:

8 May 2002, 07:17

Originally posted by Taboo # 7 Just about anything with Chuck "I can emote only constipation" Norris, but especially Invasion USA. So true-to-life, it's scary.....okay, it's not, it's awful.Chuck Norris....:headoff:

I have been forced to sit through Invasion USA before ... Is there any plot in that movie ? All I seem to remember is seeing people being blow apart every 5 seconds ... Was a fan of ol Chuck when I was quite young though ..

8 May 2002, 07:27

Worst movie ?

"Eyes Wide Shut" - no redeeming features

8 May 2002, 07:55

I can think of a couple.

:\pimp2:

8 May 2002, 10:31

Originally posted by snucker anyone seen "i spit on your grave"? i hear it's the worst and most disgusting movie ever made. i've never seen it, but i was wondering if anyone can account for that claim.

:nono: I did last month. It is complete shit, not a thriller just a wank movie and not even a good one at that. Badly chopped by the BBFC, don't bother parting with anything valuable.

Utter,utter bollocks.

8 May 2002, 15:00

Originally posted by Jim Reilly > Originally posted by snucker> anyone seen "i spit on your grave"? i hear it's the worst and most disgusting movie ever made. i've never seen it, but i was wondering if anyone can account for that claim.

:nono: I did last month. It is complete shit, not a thriller just a wank movie and not even a good one at that. Badly chopped by the BBFC, don't bother parting with anything valuable.

Utter,utter bollocks.

it was cut? so i guess you never saw the famous castration in the bathtub scene...

8 May 2002, 16:47

Rockstars usually make appalling actors.....Prince in Purple Rain, Dylan in Hearts of Fire?, any of Bowies films....the only decent one I can remember was Jagger in a film with Emilio Estevez, where he plays a baddy - think it was called freejack - love that film.......honest guv;)

9 May 2002, 00:07

i actually OWN i spit on your grave. its basically about a gang rape victim taking violent revenge. there is a great scene where an asshole misogynist gets his balls sliced off in a bathtub. as he is staggering around the bathroom screaming and bleeding over everything, the woman sits in a chair in her living room with an opera record on, just listening to him scream. it is a fantastic source for samples, which i have used a number of times, even naming a symphony for a line in the movie (see aspiring musicians)

9 May 2002, 02:47

Originally posted by CandyTheBear > Originally posted by Kimberly Raymond-Jensen> > CTB, what can I say? I have great taste in music and horrible taste in movies! I am not sure why Depth thinks that there is a *FANCY* between you and I! Hey Depth, I am kind of confused at that! Enlighten me would ya! Is there something I should know? I am kinda cute and all , but I have no fans on this board!

I wouldn't have said you have no fans on this board, Kimberly - I just think my envy of you meeting Fugazi may have been misinterpreted, is all. :skeptic: The quality of your taste in music makes up for yer movie taste, BTW. :happytongue: CTB :cool:

CTB, I was hoping that we had made a love connection :eek3: ;) ;) I guess that I will have to find a new matey then! :lol: I really do have good taste in movies too, but every now and then I enjoy a crap movie! Not sure why, but I guess that I am easily entertained! So has anyone see the British movie Scum? Anyone???????? Someone needs to agree with me on how horrible this film was!

9 May 2002, 09:40

Originally posted by Kimberly Raymond-Jensen CTB, I was hoping that we had made a love connection ;) ;) I guess that I will have to find a new matey then! I really do have good taste in movies too, but every now and then I enjoy a crap movie! Not sure why, but I guess that I am easily entertained! So has anyone see the British movie Scum? Anyone???????? Someone needs to agree with me on how horrible this film was!

;) Very well, just for you - love connection established, albeit in a :computer: form. I have indeed seen Scum, and don't rate it highly. Really like Ray Winstone though - he was excellent in Sexy Beast. I'd like to point out here that I too enjoy a good crap film here and there - I even own The Phantom Menace on DVD (because: it's Star Wars. In spite of: just about everything else about it). So a small amount of bad taste proves good taste - ie. the exception that proves the rule. BTW, I checked out Cursive - not too bad. Thanks for the tip! CTB :cool:

9 May 2002, 09:54

Originally posted by Kimberly Raymond-Jensen The British movie SCUM. I must give it credit that the best line in the movie is "Where's yur toool." It wasn't the most horrible of movies, but the prison rape scene was pretty fucking horrible, and the ending,WTF ???? Has anyone ever seen it?

SCUM is a classic Sure,you've got some disturbing/powerful acts captured on film,such as the lad who slits his wrists or the greenhouse rape. I'll buy a copy if I ever find one,but i'm pretty sure it's been deleted.

9 May 2002, 10:30

Is Scum the one set in a borstal? If its the same one I'm thinking of, I prefer the female version (Scrubbers I think it was called??), starring Kathy Burke and Fat Pat Butcher in a terry towelling tracksuit :D

9 May 2002, 15:42

Originally posted by false head i actually OWN i spit on your grave. its basically about a gang rape victim taking violent revenge. there is a great scene where an asshole misogynist gets his balls sliced off in a bathtub. as he is staggering around the bathroom screaming and bleeding over everything, the woman sits in a chair in her living room with an opera record on, just listening to him scream. it is a fantastic source for samples, which i have used a number of times, even naming a symphony for a line in the movie (see aspiring musicians)

yep, that was the scene i was talking about. so i guess you're proud to have seen it and own it and like it? i don't think i could have the stomach for it...