Best phrases when describing a bird.....

Boatraceface wrote: I know how that looks Ron... But I'm not trying eff all...Believe it or not,at the risk of sounding an arse,I have a few options away from NOOL,bird-wise.

However,might have been a bit hasty/harsh there..But I remember a previous post from Edelbrock slagging,specifically,Brit lasses...and just thought fuck that..

Hey, I wasn't claiming Brit lasses are bad, I was just mentioning that most comments on here where negative... not what I think when mentioning 'bird'....

but hey, no insult taken....

Fuck me,you take some insulting Edel! What do I have to do ? How about..I'd bone yer mam if she never had a face like a smashed toenail ?

Bad Face like a bag'o' spanners. Face like a bulldog chewin' a wasp. So ugly that her mam tied a bone round her neck when she was young so the dog would play wi her. One that I did actually use upon waking after a one nighter about ten year ago - Who the fuck put that hill there! (She weren't the slimmest lass)

Good I'd lick her out for a week. Wouldn't mind givin her DBF. Sit on me face, i'll guess yer weight.

Those were the days.

Quality thread.

Boatraceface wrote: Fuck me,you take some insulting Edel! What do I have to do ? How about..I'd bone yer mam if she never had a face like a smashed toenail ?

Come now! You can do better than that! I'll give you an example:

I was screwing yer sister last night, when all of a sudden she stuck her finger up my arsehole, claiming well BRF likes it this way!

EdelBrock wrote:

Boatraceface wrote: Fuck me,you take some insulting Edel! What do I have to do ? How about..I'd bone yer mam if she never had a face like a smashed toenail ?

Come now! You can do better than that! I'll give you an example:

I was screwing yer sister last night, when all of a sudden she stuck her finger up my arsehole, claiming well BRF likes it this way!

I know,she came home and said you had a micropenis

Boatraceface wrote:

EdelBrock wrote:

Boatraceface wrote: Fuck me,you take some insulting Edel! What do I have to do ? How about..I'd bone yer mam if she never had a face like a smashed toenail ?

Come now! You can do better than that! I'll give you an example:

I was screwing yer sister last night, when all of a sudden she stuck her finger up my arsehole, claiming well BRF likes it this way!

I know,she came home and said you had a micropenis

Hey its not the size but how ya use it! Even if its like banging a garden hose in a 55 gal drum....

She also said you had an arsehole like a welly top...

You don't know what a welly is,do you?

She told me she could tell when yer mom was on the rag 'cause yer dick tastes different

You must be thinking of your own sis cos I aint got one,haha...Served Edel,served! and tell yer faggot dad to stop pestering me!

Not that I agree with this thread at all, but my favorite when commenting on someone's looks is: Got a face like a bulldog licking piss of nettles

She's got a face like a burglar's dug. She's seen more bell-ends than weekends. She's seen more Jerry Helmets than Hitler. I'd suck her shit white etc etc etc......

.... I left her arse lookin like the Japanese flag.

Boatraceface wrote: You must be thinking of your own sis cos I aint got one,haha...Served Edel,served! and tell yer faggot dad to stop pestering me!

Hey my dad just called, he said just 'cause yer mom is family doesn't mean you get 'free-ones', pay up there sonny boy!

You two...

GET A ROOM!!!!!

MIMX wrote:

Gazman wrote:

Beef curtains

You clatty little man!

MIMX wrote: So is that what you say to a woman who's sitting indelicately?

"For Christ sake shut your legs, your beef's showing"!

"Fucks sake hen,pit yer snatch away.."

"Fucks sake hen,who hit ye with the axe?"

GlasVegas wrote: .... I left her arse lookin like the Japanese flag.

EdelBrock wrote:

Boatraceface wrote: You must be thinking of your own sis cos I aint got one,haha...Served Edel,served! and tell yer faggot dad to stop pestering me!

Hey my dad just called, he said just 'cause yer mom is family doesn't mean you get 'free-ones', pay up there sonny boy!

You tell Mr Micro Snr,when he's finished tossin your salad...don't mail me anymore,I don't give a rat's tits if he's got a two-cock gob!

Hey I have no reason to get into yer family's quarrels... you can tell that to yer dad on yer own time...

just make sure he uses listerine before you kiss him hello....

Think it was Bernard Manning to a femal audience member: "Ay up love, bet you've flattened some grass"

EdelBrock wrote: Hey I have no reason to get into yer family's quarrels... you can tell that to yer dad on yer own time...

just make sure he uses listerine before you kiss him hello....

Are you always this shit,knobbreath? Bet you look forward to christmas,when your old fella gives you a pootash on yer lip,with his finger after he's scratched his arse with it!

Right,I'm done..this is childish even by my standards

Im no saying shes easy,but she gets called "the mattress"

Gazman wrote: Im no saying shes easy,but she gets called "the mattress"

That reminds me: In the Marine Corps females are called woman Marines or WM fer short.... WM also stood for "walking mattress"

BRF----freakin' light weight

like throwing a hotdog down a hallway

swinging a bat in a wind tunnel...

Gazman wrote: Im no saying shes easy,but she gets called "the mattress"

Is She no known as the local bike?

'Cause everycunt's rode her!

(The language on this site is fucking appalling so it is)!:(

MIMX wrote:

Gazman wrote: Im no saying shes easy,but she gets called "the mattress"

Is She no known as the local bike?

'Cause everycunt's rode her!

(The language on this site is fucking appalling so it is)!:(

Thats that bird "tandem",

she takes two at once

Skank.

Theyre aw cow's bar yer maw....

This is just hammering women a wee bit, too say the least! Best phrase to describe a bird...Warm-blooded egg-laying vertebrates characterized by feathers and forelimbs modified as wings...

So, a hen...

...or, something to get your cock into!

MIMX wrote: This is just hammering women a wee bit, too say the least! Best phrase to describe a bird...Warm-blooded egg-laying vertebrates characterized by feathers and forelimbs modified as wings...

So, a hen...

...or, something to get your cock into!

nice plummage... wouldn't mind sucking off a bit o' bar-b-que sauce on them thighs, legs and breasts

Do not click :nono: