Squirrel Flavour Crisps!

and other nonsense flavours!

Jeffers, you will be pleased to know no squirrels were harmed in the making of these crisps.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1109709/To-blazes-Squirrels-blamed-hour-MPs-home.html

Twisted fire starters

El Jarvo wrote: Squirrels are cunts. End of.

I've ended up getting a squirrel-feeder for my garden, because they just rob and trash every-fucking-thing I leave out for the birds. If you can't beat 'em, etc. However, even with their own feeder they still give the rest of my garden a good thrashing whenever there's food about. At one point last autumn the little fcukers literally brought down every feeder I had around the garden and dragged them into the middle of a lawn in a nice 'fuck you' pile. If I hadn't have seen it with my own eyes I'd have thought a spoilt child had run amok in my garden trying to spite me.

Anyways, if you're gonna serve them up as food people find them more palatable when they're dished up as 'tree lamb'.

Or Dogfish tastes better as "rock salmon". Can't really understand that, "shark and chips" would sell quite well I'd have thought.

If you look at the bottom image and the text above it, you could be forgiven for thinking that Lord Mayhew himself is a squirrel.

Can Squirels burp?

If not, maybe the old anti-seagull technique of bread and bicarbonate of soda would do the trick? KeeerrrrrrBOOOOOM!

Of course, if one is friendly with the local avifaunal population, this might not be the best approach, unless you fancy finding a load of detonated starlings in your garden.

That is evil!!

Dodjem wrote: That is evil!!

Certainly would be if you did it to squirrels or starlings. Seagulls on the other hand deserve anything and everything they get. Not done it since I was ten, but only because I found more amusing and ironic ways of sorting them out.....A personal favourite is, when returning from a boat trip, with 500,000 gulls following the boat and shiting all over it.....take two mackerel, remove the heads, and tie the two heads together with about 50 feet of line, throw the fish heads in opposing directions and wait. The best bit is, that the non-greedy gulls will just have the fish head pulled out of the gobs.....the greedy ones will get orally disemboweled.

Oddly when a gull gets itself into my line, I'll save it's neck despite the fucker ripping chunks out of me for my trouble.....and despite the fact it'll jump into the guy next to me's line in 3 mins time......either to take a feather (mackerel eating feathers I can deal with, they're the dumbest of dumb fish....but gulls HAVE fucking feathers how the hell can it fool them?)....or trying to grab a fish someone just returned, while it's still a bit stunned.....total wankers.

Remember the hedgehog flavoured crisps?

How the feck would ye know if they actually tasted like hedgehogs (apart from the obvious)

, Glasgow

Doctor? wrote:

Dodjem wrote: That is evil!!

Seagulls on the other hand deserve anything and everything they get

and pigeons,a feckin hate pigeons

Gazman wrote:

Doctor? wrote:

Dodjem wrote: That is evil!!

Seagulls on the other hand deserve anything and everything they get

and pigeons,a feckin hate pigeons

I don't generally mind them as long as they aren't having a pigeon gangbang on my windowsill at 4am. But, Bangor has a huge feral cat population, so we don't have too many pigeons....gulls are sadly too big for all but the most ambitious cats.

Doctor? wrote:

Gazman wrote:

Doctor? wrote:

Dodjem wrote: That is evil!!

Seagulls on the other hand deserve anything and everything they get

and pigeons,a feckin hate pigeons

I don't generally mind them as long as they aren't having a pigeon gangbang on my windowsill at 4am. But, Bangor has a huge feral cat population, so we don't have too many pigeons....gulls are sadly too big for all but the most ambitious cats.

Im feckin scared of them Steve,pure fear I freeze up if i see them in my road,i have to cross the road to get away from them

One even shit in my coffee once!

Gulls fecal dive bombing is just as nasty...I've had my chips, my sandwiches and my tackle bag targetted, repeatedly. Chap I was out in a boat with last summer caught one right on the forehead....that was a hectic day, we had about 100 of them round the boat while fishing (usually the greedy cunts wait until you're headed in, already loaded with fish), fighting, fucking and snapping at lures and fish attached to them.

we put forward loads of flavours in that internet vote. cant believe they didnt pick my chocolate and cheese one :( i will still work out a way to get choc and cheese to the public 100's of people voted fish and chips. common fuckers

i LIKE plane crisps till they fly OFF!

Shut up Rocket, no one likes you anyway.