NOOL-ettes: what would you do to Bernard
Archived233 replies · 3,631 views
He's yours, you;ve got him cornered, what's it to be.
Closed-
Whatever he likes 3 (10%)
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Whatever I like 4 (14%)
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Unprintable 14 (48%)
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Nowt, he's married 2 (7%)
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Nowt, he's minging 6 (21%)
29 votes · voting closed
Wino - went to the ballet a few moths back in islington, Sadler's \wells, -london. Was brilliant, modern ballet with chicago house, classic music etc... mental! Defo few interesting things on view!
As for the t-shirts, i'm happy to get them made up and anything else, i.e badges etc... just need some guidance (as i'm new) as to what people want etc....
Steve, thanks for the inspiration. Star!
It's like Robin Williams used to say[1]
"men in pants so tight you can tell what religion they are"
It was just starting to look a bit pornographic for my innocent eyes for a second there "ladies"
[1]every night in his improv show
Bonzette
Can I just say welcome to the madhouse!
T-shirts, I have no idea where to start. Badges...there are a few people on here who do the Vikings badges, which get given out to the NOOLers at the shows and they would know more about it than I do. I'll ask around...:D
Bonzette wrote: Wino - went to the ballet a few moths back in islington, Sadler's \wells, -london. Was brilliant, modern ballet with chicago house, classic music etc... mental! Defo few interesting things on view!
As for the t-shirts, i'm happy to get them made up and anything else, i.e badges etc... just need some guidance (as i'm new) as to what people want etc....
Steve, thanks for the inspiration. Star!
OH Bernard, what HAVE I done. I'm sorry mate, so sorry.
I notice not ONE of you gives a second thought for poor Sarah!
i've seen this in women before it's like "if he was mine, I wouldn't let me snipe him away, so you clearly don't want him enough.deserve him" Men, having that little cuttoff switch at the base of the penis that trips as the willie rises and transfers all brain function to the now active primary brain, are almost always unable to argue. Unless they REALLY love their legitimate woman.
Steve Campbell wrote: there's blood in the water now :D
lot of posting, not a lot of voting ladies.... I coulnd't include all the options with whips, chains, chocolate, silk scarfs and gangbangs with Phill, so make do with what's up there will ya? ( don;t see why not, it's practically your motto with guys)
Whips? Yes. Chains? I could be talked into it. Chocolate? Not a problem. Silk scarfs? Definitely. Anything with Phil? No thanks. I'd have to go one-on-one with Bernard. He'd need my full attention. I'm a young lass and he's---not so young, so I'll need to give his First Aid afterwards thus no time for poor Phil ;-)
Gee...I hope Bernard's wife doesn't visit NOOL!!
Heather
Steve Campbell wrote: It's like Robin Williams used to say[1]
"men in pants so tight you can tell what religion they are"
It was just starting to look a bit pornographic for my innocent eyes for a second there "ladies"
[1]every night in his improv show
Innocent eyes, Steve? Pah!
Are you sure it wasn't Robbie Williams?!!! Oh shit, I'll be done for libel as he's not into that sort of thing, is he?!! 
Steve Campbell wrote:
I notice not ONE of you gives a second thought for poor Sarah!
Hell, no.
Isn't he from "round your way"?
he might come round and prove himself a man :)
"no robbie, no, I'm Bernard's I tell you Bernard's alone, unHAND me you oaf"
(imagine another woman seen you beating robbie off....aaaaahhhh errrrrrmmmm...rephrase........saw you resisting Robbie's offers....I can see the headline now "screaming mental case committed")
Samantha Chapman wrote:
Steve Campbell wrote:
I notice not ONE of you gives a second thought for poor Sarah!
Hell, no.
Sarah?! Ha! She's had her turn with him...she needs to pass him on.
Heather
Steve Campbell wrote: Isn't he from "round your way"?
he might come round and prove himself a man :)
"no robbie, no, I'm Bernard's I tell you Bernard's alone, unHAND me you oaf"
(imagine another woman seen you beating robbie off....aaaaahhhh errrrrrmmmm...rephrase........saw you resisting Robbie's offers....I can see the headline now "screaming mental case committed")
He is from around my way, less than five miles away from me. But he's a cnut. He supports Port Vale (Stoke's bitter rivals) for starters and I hate him for that reason alone. In fact, don't get me started or it might turn into 'hate Robbie Williams thread'
Oh and his music is shite 
Actually, i must say, I've caught my dearest Leanne glancing in a certain way at Hooky more than once. BUT the one time I caught her letchin Bernard she was GONE, off in twisted little chick sex world. I thought I was gonna need a fish-slice to get off my sofa. a couple of days later the following comment emerged...
"I woulda SO been a fan back before they were old, woulda learned to like that awful noise too, there's still something about both of them, but yer man barney, I'd still SO do him"
That was before barney insulted green day, she's huffing with him now :)
Steve Campbell wrote:
That was before barney insulted green day, she's huffing with him now :)
Leanne LIKES GREEN DAY?!?!?!?!?
I voted for "What he likes"...
I have to admit that even though I'm 18, I have a huge crush on him...
He's just so adorable and cute!(And, he's good looking for his age, too.)
Christopher Owens wrote:
Steve Campbell wrote:
That was before barney insulted green day, she's huffing with him now :)
Leanne LIKES GREEN DAY?!?!?!?!?
A matter if intricate semantics is that question, Chris.
I offer the following conversation into the record.
"found some green day live stuff on soulseek, you want it?" "audio or video" "mp3" "no ta, just video's thanks"(dribble, homer simpson fasion)
Dumb blonde she aint, but when it comes to music, she's a chick's chick.
(before you attack me like a pack of vicious jack russel's let me point out, that I AM AWARE that none of you lot are like that, and that your sexual infatuation with Bernard is purely secondary to, if not resultant from, the music, rather than as is tradition for those of your gender, the converse on both counts) (and breathe)
I was just wondering.....
how long we need to keep all the girls talking on this one thread......
Before their menstrual cycles all sync up.
Oh look, there's the doorman now, with my coat,
Back off you Barney angels wannabes and you too Steve, he's all mine (Barney not Steve) :D I've destroyed so many relationships quite successfully, ruining one marriage should be a piece of cake really. I'll be the one wearing "Barney, marry me" t-shirt next time you see me 
I Found Truth wrote:
Samantha Chapman wrote:
Steve Campbell wrote:
I notice not ONE of you gives a second thought for poor Sarah!
Hell, no.
Sarah?! Ha! She's had her turn with him...she needs to pass him on.
Heather
Ahhhh female logic, I must confess I admire it, it beats bloke logic, which is merely a series of basical procedures that all run on what is essentially the Dog's Code of Conduct: "if you can't eat it or fuck it, piss on it"
NObabe wrote: Back off you Barney angels wannabes and you too Steve, he's all mine (Barney not Steve) :D I've destroyed so many relationships quite successfully, ruining one marriage should be a piece of cake really. I'll be the one wearing "Barney, marry me" t-shirt next time you see me
now now Maya, calm down, let the blood flow back up to your brain for a moment..... If you all gang up..... theres more chance of getting access to him....then it;s ever bitch for herself.
Don;t they shows those scumbaggy backbiting gameshows over there in flippin uzbekistahn
EDIT: I wonder if Bernard (I keep calling him that these days I must be feeling guilty for all the horrid things I been saying about him), has seen "misery". Maya, possessive and psychotic is a big dick softener !
i wouldnt shag barney sorry i am a raving hetrosexual but there was once a fantastic top class race horse called DANCING BRAVE,i might have been tempted there
bansheeman wrote: i wouldnt shag barney sorry i am a raving hetrosexual but there was once a fantastic top class race horse called DANCING BRAVE,i might have been tempted there
"SING IF YOU'RE STOKED TO BE STRAIGHT ......."
or is it... (think rolf harris) "Get oats from a goat boys, get yer oats from a goat(fuckawallaby) get yer oats......etc"
Boatraceface wrote: Good horse Dancing Brave.It won the Arc de Triumphe
I would say Barney is a Brave Dancer
Most offensive thing I've EVER said on this fourm......
that's brave as in "isn't he brave" referring to some kid that akes timmy from southpark look cool trying to run a mararhon to raise money for homeless dogs
ERRRRRRR BTW, the girls have all gone....
either..... bean licking/peach stroking/horse feeding has become suddenly urgent to them or my coment about their periods falling into sync if we kept the thread going long enough upset them and they went away or the above but the formed a chat room to discuss Barney and make up stories about how small all our willies are or, the same but they're just writing VERY long upset posts to make me feel small :)
Boatraceface wrote: Good horse Dancing Brave.It won the Arc de Triumphe
the only thing dancing brave missed was the derby.
that derby day pat held it up slightly too long chasing sharastani.
it got within an inch of winning on the line but that derby day it did the quickest furlong ever in world history,still the record time
whoooops this aint the ladbrokes thread 
Samantha Chapman wrote: Where's Maya?!!!
You so wouln't ask that question whilst "fook-me-afraid-to-even-picture-da-situation", now would you? 
bansheeman wrote:
Boatraceface wrote: Good horse Dancing Brave.It won the Arc de Triumphe
the only thing dancing brave missed was the derby. that derby day pat held it up slightly too long chasing sharastani. it got within an inch of winning on the line but that derby day it did the quickest furlong ever in world history,still the record time
whoooops this aint the ladbrokes thread
All correct but for 1 detail mate.Grevelle Starkey was the Jockey what ballsed up the Derby(give the horse an impossible amount to do)Got sacked...Enter Eddery and the glory days
Barney is a stud by the way
Boatraceface wrote:
bansheeman wrote:
Boatraceface wrote: Good horse Dancing Brave.It won the Arc de Triumphe
the only thing dancing brave missed was the derby. that derby day pat held it up slightly too long chasing sharastani. it got within an inch of winning on the line but that derby day it did the quickest furlong ever in world history,still the record time
whoooops this aint the ladbrokes thread
All correct but for 1 detail mate.Grevelle Starkey was the Jockey what ballsed up the Derby(give the horse an impossible amount to do)Got sacked...Enter Eddery and the glory days
Barney is a stud by the way
