Swollen Nutsack Soul Squadron

have yourself a good one, ya pillfairy :) Hope some of that pain and bad feeling gets on with its bad self and leaves you to feel slightly better tomorrow.

such a kind, sweet, well mannered girl.

Sadly your wishes have been ignored....so sore...so so very very sore.

Look, it's the CZ before its crippling disfigurement:

I like to visit Rogue Music (online at least) to check up on prices...and to see what's "Vintage Gear" these days and what's just "Old, Used Crap."

My buddy picked up a Roland SH-101 for $50 bucks at the hometown music shop ('cause it "didn't work"; um, did you guys ever think of plugging in the right AC adapter?).

Linux? My dad gave me his old W*****s 95 box which is to become a lean, mean Linux machine someday.

inconsolable

I binned the chasis and front panel when i moved house in august :( Kept the mod and pitch wheels as a keepsake and to hopefully give them at least the burial I promised the synth......viking sylee into the Irish sea.

Wonderful machines.....every dance band is obsessed with them, but only the ickle cz101....the 3000 was like 16 or 32 of them. Apprently (source good, SOS, but I refuse to believe) the CZ series was the first multitimbral digital instrument after the fairlight (remember none of the DX's were, not even the utterly bonkers DX1...........

more polyphony than keys if memory serves (no muti mode neither)...cost fuckin daft money too....i think they built about 15 of them :D

my mogue rogue? £37, haggled him down the 2 bills as well. To this day i think someone (not me) had messed the price tags up cos there was an evil looking early 1980's yamaha clavinova besides it, that I would have said was barely worth crossbow practice...with £320 sitting on it

Linux....I can't afford a mac, and even if i could they suck balls for games and until recently their OS has been as trnsparent as coal, once you get past theb happy smilie exterior, it's like a Dr who plot FFS. And windows is THE WORST OS I ever set finger on ..Jesus it stinks.

My windows box and I now have an arrangement....don't stop running any apps overnight, and i keep my hands out of tour registry fucko. That, and rigorous backups and cleanups, keep us ina a tolerant working relationship :D

My linux box just sits there doing everything including NOOL :)....it get's rebooted only on one of 5 occasions.

1. a kernel upgrade
2. another machine on the network (read as a WINDOWS machine) shuts off it's shares for no reason, hangs my /mnt dir and I can't be arsed fixing it properly so I reboot. 3.Hardware upgrade (well duh) 4.horrid video car burps and locks (once in a VERy blue moon and only with system overclocked to "psychotic" FSB speeds.)
3. power cut

I'm slagging off Campo in the "What song would like to hear" thread and he's not there to appreciate it. Lazy bastard.

Well I aint been over there much...no point til i have some tunes to discuss :D Besides, it really wasn't up to your usual high standard of abuse old chap.

Oh but how I've missed this thread.

Just read through it again.

It IS a true NOOl classic....think I'll make a cd of it and frame it :D

Must as the title makes me whince when I read it.

Think of the thread as a salve with which to soothe your pain by laughter.

melly wrote: Think of the thread as a salve with which to soothe your pain by laughter.

10/10 for effort, but laughing kinda sucks too.

only kidding, if it did, they'd be about 8 people on here i'd have to avoid and at least one that would be near fatal.

Well now, we certainly don't want you dead...

we'd never get our badges then.

I no longer wish to be cremated for the sole reason that I need these immortal words engraved on my tombstone:

In the past 3 days, the most popular thread for everyone has been " Swollen Nutsack Soul Squadron".

:rip:

I suppose you'll be needing a song played to go along with that eulogy.. perhaps "Big Balls" ?

great balls of fire ? I think i want my headstone to read simply "fuck off"

Yeah, well, that's all great and everything, BUT I'm gonna visit it every year and leave a note in lipstick sayin' you was loved. :beer2:

But that'll completely ruin the whole effect. GRRRRRR

Actually, I had a momentary vision of you and my other lady friends wailing by my graveside....then my mind cleared and I realised I'd better get a couple of beer pumps installed in me headstone, and some speakers, and some lights, oh and one of those patio heater things in case it's too cold to party on my grave. And when some dissapproving soul comes to should come to chase you off, you can show them all the lovely facilities I had installed for you, and then point them to my inscription :D

You're planning ahead, good man.

Maybe we'll all bring a little something to smoke by your side in those long wintery months. Maybe we'll start a bonfire nearby. We'll need fireworks, too.

melly wrote: You're planning ahead, good man.

Maybe we'll all bring a little something to smoke by your side in those long wintery months. Maybe we'll start a bonfire nearby. We'll need fireworks, too.

I couldn't shake the thought of Jem standin there saying "miserable irish twat, I drag my arse all the way up 'ere and 'e's not even got the beers in forruz" Most of you would be too ladylike to complain about the facilites at a grave, but jem's from Bolton, she'll go off on one if I aint burried withing 200 yrds of a chippy.

a grievin' gal's gotta eat to cry for those long hours in the night.

Waiting for the Siren's Call. Whining for the Butty Stall.

No fair melster, that was my mornin coffee I just sprayed.

Couldn't (wouldn't) help it. It was just begging to be said. All it really was a matter of was who.

Can't be bothered to take into account of things like coffee, morning, or just getting up as a signal to ward of on being humorous.

I mean, really, for me it's such a rarity.

There's something wrong when I'm listening to Morning, Night and Day and start chuckling at "I just want some action".

The playlist is just about to switch over to the KLF, so I won't be giggling for too long.

I wouldn't worry about it Melly....Jemma and Bonzette have caused untold damage to my computer over recent weeks....FFS Bonz made me explode with such violence that it got my new flat panel monitor.....luckily only a fleshwound.

Maybe I should start selling "nool gaurds" to hold up when reading postage by the usualy suspects.A bit like smoking a spliff thru a halloween mask cos it's full of exploding seeds.

I'd wished I'd had one those guards when I first started reading here the second time around.. it was tough to come back and see all this chaos and mirth flying out at me from all angles.

A bit like the result of an exploding seed hitting your friend across the lounge. They never know to duck cos know one knows which way it's going, but ooooh does it sting once it sets in.

I can't for the life of me figure out why he bothered to chase after me to get a hit in for it, either. He swore I'd rolled it especially for the bang factor.

I also might have glued his strings to his fret, but he didn't figure that out until he'd stop being so stoned, the next afternoon.

melly wrote: I'd wished I'd had one those guards when I first started reading here the second time around.. it was tough to come back and see all this chaos and mirth flying out at me from all angles.

A bit like the result of an exploding seed hitting your friend across the lounge. They never know to duck cos know one knows which way it's going, but ooooh does it sting once it sets in.

I can't for the life of me figure out why he bothered to chase after me to get a hit in for it, either. He swore I'd rolled it especially for the bang factor.

I also might have glued his strings to his fret, but he didn't figure that out until he'd stop being so stoned, the next afternoon.

This time I DID set the coffee down before reading.

you EVER come within 6 feet of my bass and I'll use it on you ! :D

c'mon Melly you aren't telling me you never strategically loaded a doobie to cause maximum seed-pyrotechnices or (in the case of hash) what I like to call Abdominal Arclight (in the B52 sense).

the most devastation I ever seen was caused by an ill concevied chilum we made out of a small lenght of brush-shaft (we usually used a carrot, the reason for which will become apparent as [hase II of the tale comes around). Anyway, the first thing to happen was that after mixing a modicum of baccy and a great deal (bout 20 bloody quid's worth, a night's smoking for all of us usually) of the finest slate hash into a beautyful homogenised powder (which takes fuckin ages).....we filled our little pipe with about hafthe mixture and passed it to $DUDE for the first smoke....with the words "go easy lad until you know what it's like". $DUDE promptly takes a tug on the thing that, frankly I would not have attempted even if it hadn;t been lit, and that looked suicidal from the outset. Sure enough about 1.5 seconds into this mamouth toke, all systems went into reverse. With one almighty bodypopping choke he blasted the entire contents of his lungs right back through the thing in a period too short to measure. krakatoa had NOTHING on this....bits hit the ceiling, the curtains..alll of us...the floor....everything was covered in tiny firebrands that took some SERIOUS stamping out.

So after we'd put ourselves and the house out and spent quite some time mourning the loss, and caling $DUDE names, we deciced to try again with the remaining mixture. This time we all took heed and there were no adventure. Except..... As I mentioned normally a modified carrot is used because chilum mix as we made it was one step down from thermite, and the dense wet tissue of the carrot was the PERFECT material to burn it in. A brush shaft however is not. After the pipe had been round a few times we started to think we'd done all right in losing the first one.....after it had been round a few times more we started to wonder what was going on.

At that point we found we'd been smoking the pipe itself for quite some considerable time, it having combusted quite readily in the presense of 1000oC smoking mixture.

Henceforth that night was known by all present simply as "the night we smoked the chilum"

Dope doesn't do you any harm....it's being a fucktard cos you're hammered that causes the problems :D