Swollen Nutsack Soul Squadron

Steve Campbell wrote:

And Jem....the kit's hired :D

When I get home tonight I'll post a photo of my kit.

Either here or in the "Show us your kit!" thread.

And not to sound too American-o-centic, Mr. Campbell, but, erm, do they have doctors in Northern Ireland? A diagnosis? High-quality leeches?

Get well already.

Steve Campbell wrote: you'd just sit there behind your bass grinning inanely at poor Jack saying "you know Barney! what's he like? is he as gorgeous in real life? does he smell nice"

I think the "does he smell nice" bit is what's really killing me.

Oh, um, hi there msh! I didn't see you there.

Are you gonna tell Jack to read "fanmail" or am I :)

GNU....would you believe they want to treat me with some hrrendous grug that can only be prescribed by a pecialist...and guess what...the dermatology Dept. of the local Hossy is "awaiting restaffing" it's been over a year. All the other shite I take is just to get by with.

I'm not broken, it's just that there's no way I want anyone else to have to BE down there, it's too much to ask....even if they actually wanted to. And yes, the pits aren;t great either, although this usually ruins the armpits mine arent bad, BUT it seems no matter what i do I just can't get to what I would consider a state of cleanliness fit to share a bed with a women. google it..... hidradenitis suppurativa

fucking nasty, but it's not gonna kill me so what's to gurn about.

Hello again, Gnu. :)

Steve, you gon on, you tell him. I just re-read the thread and am incapacitated.

I dunno, he already thinks I'm stalking him :D

BTW did you like my song for Jem?

(artist mode....must have praise)

I laughed myself out of my chair, it was great.

She liked it too. :) I wish I'd known it was so easy to impress amazing women :D

Hey how you doin MSH? You wowed me with your technical know-how. If i win the lottery this Sat, i'm gonna pay for you and Gnu to come to the NOOLer day!

But i probably won't.

Damn it

Oh i'd definitely pay, do you wanna come too? Fuck it, i'll buy a Lear jet and pick you all up.

With a lottery win jem we ( see how it's WE if millions are on the menu) can hire a fookin Jumbo and bring the whole bloody US order over. (but we'll filter the wankers by making them find their own way)

Missy Jem wrote: Hey how you doin MSH? You wowed me with your technical know-how. If i win the lottery this Sat, i'm gonna pay for you and Gnu to come to the NOOLer day!

You, Steve, Gnu and Bonz and so many others have kept a smirk on my face or a laugh in my belly, so hats off to you guys, too.

I'm praying for my own lottery win. But, I have true faith that if not this time around, I'll get over the pond to you guys soon enough, and then hell'll freeze over due to all the mischief breaking loose.

Hey we'd all come see you but...well we're foreigners...we might even be anti-american foreigners :D

we'll be over when the nation returns to it's senses :)

Well if you can't make the NOOLer day, we'll all stick a rose to our eye and walk around squinting all day, just for you!

Steve will anyway, he's weird like that.:)

Forsooth for I doest in the distance the soft tones of fair maiden pot bismirching the reflectivity index of my lord kettle hear.

I love it. You all can wear a rose on your lapel for me! Must be dyed interesting shades of blue! That was Steve's request, and why I've got such a colorful avatar, now.

All these ladies doin stuff just cos of ME it's really making me quite faint.

Respect's a great feeling, though, ain't it?

Semms to be....but most things invloving women go wrong for me eventually :D

Well, us BA's may just have to rectify this terminal bad luck and make you a success with a gaggle of women, now won't we? Kind of like a reference for a job app.

2005-? Managed and herded 'Barney's Angels' a privately funded elite group of boxerlusting women assassins.

Bless yer little cottons yer a princess. TBH, I already lucked in if you ask me :D

But today has not started well. Swelling have swollen (not my nuittsack in case you wonder....worse the entire area between balls and ass is swelling). This is making moving very sore, and pushing me into a game of painkiller bukaroo. Dunno if you ever played bukaroo, it's a child game where you pile stuff on a plstic donkey till it's spring trips ans flings everything off.....you can play a very simillar game with drunk passouts. Anyway...painkiller bukaroo is....can you get enough painkillers into you to actually be able to move around without yelling out loud....or will your guts call time out and eject everything first. I already had 2 pilss, and am still really sore AND my guts are defo communicating their displeasure.

I can actually FEEL it getting worse, feel blood vessels being stretched and burst and they fill with goo....I imagine it's rather like a cologen or botchelism injection...felling your flesh stretch to accomodate.

I'm in an evil mood too cos I'm so sore, each time I make a typo and have to correct I alomst yell out loud. I'm also totally knackered having only had 2.5 hours sleep cos I was so so.

GGGGGGGGGGGRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRr

And I know you're thinking..."if I was there I'd So give you a hug".....no, no you wouldn't....I wouldn't let anybody get a noseful of what's seeping out of my skin right now.

sorry...just up and just skorry for myself and weepy

I likely wouldn't try to hug you only on the offchance you're like me when you're in annoying pain and you get beargrowly and ready to rumble anything that breathes on you.

Though, I *would* make you soup and generally cater to your every other non-touch need. I'm so domestic.

If there's one thing I'm great at, it's that nurse thing. :)

I'll pass a few feel better thoughts your way. Sooner or later the others will have to wake up and be around and they'll give you smiles and guffaws and keep that spirit up on you.

It's their sworn duty.

You're actually MUCH too sweet. I've got the "I;m gonna chuck coughs" now. So I have to reach for my Bong....hate getting blasted at this hour of day...but it really DOES stop you throwing up.....and all those years I thought those Medical users were just chancing stoners.

So bloody frustrating.....stuck here for the day again....thank god for NOOL.

If a few hits helps, I say more power to you. I've always felt pretty unlucky to be mostly immune to it - but I seem to make up for it in other ways when desperately in need. :p

I found my teddy bear, and got some milk so I'll be back off to try to get one shut eye in.

*bighug* Now, you take care. And smile. See you nutters later today.

Sleep well and may the staff of wherever you escaped from not find you during the night my sweet.

Stevie, you still in pain? Awww. I take it you've got a sick note for a while?

Good morning Missy Jem!

Mr. Campbell, you and the missus ought to compare painkillers sometimes. A couple of morphine with coffee, then some hydrocodone throughout the day...we've a bigass opiate stash and I'm not allowed to touch it. Not as glamorous as it seems, though, is it? I get so pissed off (American style) when I read that Colin Fucking Ferrell, e.g., is being "treated" for an addiction to painkillers. The missus has to jump through hoops to get them just so she can get out of bed and walk around, and then call to get permission to take an extra one. That's why it's so important to me to become a Hollywood celebrity...so I can get giant bags o' pills.

msh, can I call you Melly? Not Melly B or Melly C, though...gosh, you're much prettier than a Spice Girl.

And there's me off sendin you a good morning mail :D

I can't see me being back at work before the summer. that's make it a nice 2 years. I remember when the subjet came up in work "go see a doctor mate you look like you're dying" and seeing Leanne nearly weepin when she was lookin at me sit down....And I told them if I went to the doc it'd be a long time. Didn't think it'd be this long. Like i said i can;t get anything done until the specialist I've to see gets his new staff. And when I do see him I have this to look forward to... The only treatment apparently

ctually an acne treatment but they reckon it may work.

If that fails....they have to cut out all my pheremone producing sweat glands......yeaaaaah like I'm not unsexy enough as it is...now I wont even smell like a man. that means hige chunks out of my armpits and groin and god only knows how long immobilized in hospital. I dont do hossy....so I'm very much hoping it doesn't come to that.

Some days i feel like a total fraud, billy the chav living on his incapacity benefit and living the good life (my definition of the good life being 2 warm computers, a bass and NOOL), on those days it FEELS like I've got no pain and all my mobility back...but it's only a relative thing really as people keep pointing out..like the company's doctor last week, the bloody thing was on extra good behaviour I thought, goinna make me look like a real skiver....doc takes a look at it and says..."and that's it dormant in your book is it?" and shook his head. Days like today....I'll probably sit at this machine all day save for peeing eating and checking for post....even getting out of the chair is REALLY unbearable, and walking sucks because of the particular specs of todays swelling. Still could be worse....could have spacehopper genitals like I had on the journey the apollo....actualy it worked out quite well....with the skin (and only the skin I might add.....my bits are cool) of me sack swollen til it was 1cm thick, it braced everything against me thighs and prevent unwanted and painful relative movements. Pogoing hurt a great deal tho as the various mounting were no design for the extra load of all that swelling.

Hope I didn't make you ill. But you guys have gotta know why I get cranky sometimes, especially with matchmakers...I really am no use to any of you ladies, sorry :(